Anaisthitos or Loveless
by Iwannabeamongoose
Summary: They're all brainless bimbos and selfish pervs. That's what Shikamaru and Temari think about members of the opposite sex. Aren't there any that are different? Only the title is Greek Rated T for safety. Read and Review! My second ShikaTem fic
1. Cold Water and Fangirls

**Anaisthitos (loveless)**

**A/N: Don't worry, there is no greek in the story, besides the title (if it is mistranslated, please tell me ). Hey, this is my second Shika-Tem fic. Right now I am pretty busy starting high school, so I am not sure when I will be able to update (pretty soon). This first chapter is going to be kind of cornily emotional, but please hang with me, I promise it will get better. I first got the idea for this fic when I was listening to music (as it usually happens) by Garbage and Dream. Don't ask me how. As always, I had trouble with the title, so I might change it (I'll need suggestions, though). Please read and review, even only to flame it.**

Freezing water seared and soothed his feet, causing both pain and comfort at the same time. The river's current gently pulled at Shikamaru's legs, like a woman tugging on her lover's hand, beckoning him to follow her. Feet just dangling there, the lazy ninja sat, shoulders drooped, on the riverbank, staring listlessly ahead, with his chin resting on a single cupped hand. Fluffy clouds floated above him, yet he paid them no attention. For once in his life, Shikamaru couldn't relax. He couldn't explain it. Something wasn't right with him.

A troubling emptiness had been growing inside him, gnawing at his core. He was still the bored genius around his friends, but... he didn't always feel that way all the time. Shikamaru could not go to get barbecue with Chouji or be dragged to one of Ino's favorite new designer stores without getting the same nagging impression. Increasingly and increasingly he felt the sensation that something was missing in his life. Something feminine.

Eyebrows slightly furrowed, brown orbs downcast, Shikamaru contemplated his girl problems for what had to be the thousandth time that week. _It's not like I don't know what I'm missing... It seems like everybody's started hooking up. Ino's had, what, like six boyfriends in the last three months? Naruto and Hinata, they make a good couple. Hell, I heard that even Shino's been seen eating lunch with some kunoichi. Not to mention, pfff... every woman and girl in Konoha between the ages of 10 and 25 are rejoicing the fact that Sasuke's icy view of them is starting to thaw. Ne, how troublesome... _

Shikamaru sighed and took his numb feet out of the ice water. Purple splotches covered them, and they throbbed, but he didn't care. Despite his disgust with his own vanity, Shikamaru stared bleakly down at the reflection framed on the surface of the river. At fifteen, Shikamaru thought of himself as neither ugly nor handsome, but somewhat dull looking. _I'm not exactly the type of guy that most girls want as a boyfriend. Lazy and boring. I won't get any woman like that..._

Angrily shaking the thoughts of self-pity from his head, Shikamaru refused to feel sorry for himself. Remembering the calming effect of the river, the depressed shinobi looked down at the water. _I'm gonna need to get more than just my feet wet. _Carefully laying his Chuunin vest on the grass, Shikamaru closed his eyes before wading out into the river. As the frigid liquid reached his stomach, he let out a sharp gasp, but continued on. He only stopped when the water was up to his neck, feeling a strange sense of relief in the numbness of his body, Shikamaru exhaled before undoing his hair tie, throwing it back on the riverbank and dunking his head. All around him, the current swirled, and several trout swam in place lazily several feet from him. He remained submerged in his state of blissful senselessness until his body begged for oxygen.

Finally, he resurfaced, ears popping, and filled his lungs with air. Satisfied, he returned to land and shook his hair like a dog before tying it back up. Looking down at his drenched clothing, Shikamaru groaned to himself. _Mom's gonna kill me. _Shivering, the lazy ninja scooped up his vest and headed home.

Walking through the streets, Shikamaru noticed that the golden Konoha sun was starting to set. He hadn't realized how long he'd been gone. When he'd left his house it had been a brisk spring morning. _Crap, Mom's gonna kill me, resurrect me, and kill me again... _Grimacing, Shikamaru rounded a street corner and froze in his tracks, eyebrows twitching in disbelief. There, in front of a ramen shop, stood the fangirl magnet himself, Uchiha Sasuke, surrounded by a harem of no less than twenty girls. _Shit, I wonder if it's too late to go back and jump in the river again... _Mood darkened by this sight, Shikamaru attempted to sneak past unnoticed, grumbling to himself. Taking one last glance back, he noticed a familiar blond head. Before he could stop himself, he called out.

"Oy, Ino!" His teammate turned her head in annoyance, but reluctantly came over when she saw who it was.

"Hey Shika, what's up? Er... Why are you all wet?" She examined his appearance only for a moment before antsily looking back at the crowd which surrounded Sasuke. Shikamaru could tell she wanted to return.

"Hn, long story. But, hey, what happened to what's-his-face, your new boyfriend, I thought you two were getting serious." He could see her tapping her feet impatiently.

"Oh, Taido. We're totally through. When word came out that Sasuke was putting himself on the market, I dumped Taido. He was a jerk anyways. Well, I gotta go, Sasuke says he's going to eat dinner with one girl and he's choosing now. See you later!" Without waiting for a response, she rushed back to the swarm of squealing girls gathered around "Mr. Hunksicle".

Fighting jealousy, Shikamaru thrust his hands deep into his pockets and continued on home, determined to keep a bored, indifferent expression plastered on his face. _Why is it that almost every girl I know is obsessed with Sasuke? It's disgusting the way they drool over him, the way they drop everything and rush to him whenever he's around. Seems like almost every girl in Konoha is nothing but a fickle fangirl. _A sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, Shikamaru made a silent vow. _I'm not gonna let any of this effect me. It's all too troublesome. If I don't fall for any girls, then there is no way that I can feel this way. That's all there is to it. No more getting caught up in bimbos._

Frown changing into a resigned expression, Shikamaru looked up at the sky. The clouds were a beautiful pinkish orange. Staring past them to the faint shape of the moon that was starting to appear, the spiky haired chuunin softly murmured an inquiry to the heavens.

"There's gotta be a couple of girls that aren't like that, right?"

He received no answer. _What did I expect? Baka... _ Eyes downcast, Shikamaru walked the last few blocks back home in silence. As he walked up the front steps, a frying pan flew out the open window and struck him in the face. His eyes crossed and he toppled backwards, hitting his head on the bottom step.

"SHHHIIIKKKAAMMMAAARRRUUU!!!" His mother's angry face appeared out the window. _Oh right, almost forgot. Unnn... _

Quickly rising, the leaf nin had to perform a set of strange dance-like maneouvres to avoid more projectiles. Dodging a toaster and a ladle, Shikamaru entered his house and angrily took a blender from his assailant's hand. His mother only glared.

"Where have you been? Dinner's getting cold, you were supposed to do the laundry and take out the trash, not to mention–" She stopped in mid sentence when she noticed that he was sopping wet.

"BAKA BAKA BAKA! You're dripping on my best rug! What happened? You have a lot of explaining to do, Shikamaru!" Wearily, Shikamaru explained that he had just been relaxing and had felt like taking a swim in the river. He left out the part about being depressed, and the nausea he'd felt on the way back. After the story, the silence between the two was broken when Shikamaru's stomach growled louder than Akamaru. Yoshino gave her son one last smack upside the head before herding him into the dining room. _Thank Kami she didn't ask any questions. _Despite the aching imprint of a frying pan on his face, Shikamaru could not help but cheer up at the thought of eating._ Damn, I'm hungry. NEEEED FOOOOD. _

Shikamaru groaned loudly in annoyance when he caught sight of what was on the table. A single bowl of cold Champon was all that remained of dinner in Shikamaru's empty place. In the spot next to it, heaps of dirty dishes and platters were stacked precariously, looking as if they were about to tumble over at any moment. Shikaku lay back in his chair, the top button of his pants undone to release his comically large gut. When he caught sight of his son's expression, Shikaku chuckled gleefully. Rising slowly, the lazy father patted his stomach and then ruffled Shikamaru's hair.

"Sorry, boy. You snooze, you lose." Before Shikamaru could reply, his mother's voice came from the kitchen.

"Shikaku! You're on dish duty!" Shikamaru smirked at his father and made a whipping motion. Shikaku only grumbled before calling back reluctantly.

"Coming, dear!"

As his dad scurried from the room, Shikamaru sat down to his bowl of noodles, smile turning back into a frown. Stifling a yawn, the leaf nin gulped the Champon down wolfishly before deciding to turn in for the night.

He stumbled up the stairs and into his room, almost tripping over a pile of dirty clothes on the ground. Cursing, he hastily stripped off his long sleeve black shirt and pants and added them to the mound o' stink. Stretching, he flung his hair tie onto his bedside table before approaching his bed. Tired and cold from his dip in the river, Shikamaru threw back the covers and collapsed face down on his pillow. Groaning, he turned onto his side and pulled the comforter up to his neck. A glow caught his eye. Propping his head up with one hand, he stared out at the sand-yellow moon which illuminated the midnight sky, casting pale rays through the window and onto his bed. _There has to be some girl for me. They can't all be the same, can they?_

Eyelids drooped and finally closed, as Shikamaru left the moon to contemplate his rhetorical question. Shikamaru dreamt of cold water and clouds.

**A/N: Well that's chapter one. I know that it's quite short, but chapter two will be up soon (maybe even tomorrow). Also, for those of you wondering, chapter three of my Teen Titan's fic Acid Burn will be up in about a week (I'm in a bit of a rut motivation wise). Thanks for reading **

**- Iwannabeamongoose**


	2. Hot Sand and Weirdos

**A/N: Oops, I forgot to say in the first chapter that the universe may be a little screwed up. For instance, I plan to show Shikamaru's abilities as they are right now in the manga, but Asuma is not dead, Sasuke is still around, etc. Confusing, I know Thanks for all the reviews **

Temari sat cross-legged, fiercely watching eddies of sand swirl through the desert

that stretched out before her. Sandstorms ravaged the dunes, metaphorical to the feelings

she felt inside. In other words, she was quite pissed. _Why the hell are all guys the same? _

Since she had turned 17, suitors had begun to flock to her, all claiming that she was something along the lines of 'their heart's deepest desire'. Normally she wouldn't have minded such attention, but there was always something weird with her would-be husbands, even if they were handsome or seemed nice at first glance.

First off, she could tell that none of them loved her. When Temari looked into their eyes, instead of the undying love they claimed to have for her, she saw primal hunger and greed.

Some were simply looking for a ticket to power, since marrying Temari would tie their clan to that of the Fifth Kazekage, Gaara of the Desert. If she ended up marrying one of them, she would be cast away after the marriage was consummated, left to rot while her husband enjoyed his new lifestyle. Sadly enough, at the time being, this was the type of suitor she preferred.

The other typical kind was much worse. They also stared at her with greed, but with a different kind. Their eyes were never still, always examining her profile, her curves, seemingly every part of her body _besides _her face. When she stood uncomfortably in front of them, her skin crawled and she felt a strong urge to break down and puke. Most of the wolves, as she had dubbed them, were at least twenty years older than her. Temari visibly cringed when she thought about what life would be with one of the wolves as her husband.

Sighing, the sand kunoichi uncrossed her tan legs and seized two fistfuls of sand. The grains scorched Temari's hand as they passed through her fingertips, but she relished the warmth that they brought her. Frowning slightly, she let the last of the sand fall back to the dune beneath her. _I guess I should be happy that none of them are in love with me. That would be gross. One thing is for sure, Temari no Sabaku is __**NOT **__marrying some slovenly old man just because he would make a good ally to the Sabaku clan. Thank kami Gaara is letting me choose my husband. I'd hate to think what would happen if daddy dearest was still Kazekage..._

Temari watched as one of the miniature sandstorms began to whirl towards her. Without batting an eye, she rose and stood there, arms spread wide as the seemingly powerful force approached her. Many of the Suna villagers feared the sandstorms, claiming that anyone caught in one would be buried alive, or have the skin ripped right off their bones. Temari simply snorted at their ignorance; people could be so stupid. As the grit washed over her, she felt calm, and yet very alive at the same time, a sensation that filled the void created by her countless meetings with suitors. Finally, the rough caresses ceased and she was left unscathed, if a little dirty, in the same spot.

Exhaling slowly, she plopped back down on the soft dune, surveying her beautiful desert with teal eyes. Smiling contentedly, she made a decision that would most likely infuriate the entire village of Suna. She would not marry anyone. _They're all pigs, for one reason or another. Some of them are even more perverted than that sage guy in Konoha... _Temari grinned gleefully when she imagined the varied expressions of disbelief and anger on the faces of her "admirers".

_Not to mention, I'm most definitely not going to act like one of those silly girls in fairy tales, waiting for Prince Charming to sweep her off her feet. Ha, I'd like to see some guy TRY to sweep me off my feet. _Temari lazily made the motion of swinging her fan and smiled slightly sadly. _If he did... WHAP. No more Prince Charming. _

_They say you know the second that you're in love... I wonder if that's true. Seems like more fairy tale bull-crap to me..._ The troublesome woman lay back and simply watched the blue sky that extended as far as her eye could see. _No clouds. Pff, seems like a cloud in Suna is about as rare as an honest man. _Temari's train of thought was disrupted as a shadow fell across her. "Gaara? Is that you?"

It was not Gaara, nor was it Kankuro or Baki-sensei. A willowy masked figure stood high above her, arms folded, carefully examining her. The man was at least six and a half feet tall, but had a wiry complexion. Judging by the veins on his hands, he was somewhere in his early forties. Temari stumbled to her feet and drew her fan, sizing up her opponent. Despite her open hostility, he made no move to attack. When at last he spoke, his voice was silky and dripping with false sweetness.

"Relax, my vibrant desert flower. I do not wish to fight with you. Please..." He did a small, fanciful bow, yet still did not reveal his face. "I have come with a _proposal, _that is all..."

Temari continued to watch him warily, expecting him to draw some hidden weapon, or begin to form hand seals. Judging by his arrogance and the interest he seemed to have in her, this was yet another man seeking to woo her. _Who knows, he might be one I've already met. Hell, I've lost count..._ _CAN'T I ESCAPE THEM FOR JUST ONE HOUR?!?_

"Cut the crap! If I hear _one_ more lame pickup line, I _swear_ I'm gonna have to kill somebody." Temari paused and looked around for good measure. Her snarl turned into a sweet smile. "And it appears that you happen to be the only person around... Now, leave me alone."

The tough girl shuddered as she thought she heard the suitor lick his lips beneath his chujo mask. Still appearing not to lose faith in his own abilities with women, the man gave a muffled response.

"The best women are the feisty ones... Are you sure you do not wish to accompany back to the house of my clan?" Temari nodded her head vigorously, repulsed by the very idea of the least bit of intimate contact with this stranger. The disguised pervert only shrugged his shoulders before taking up a fighting stance. _Now I have an excuse to beat the bejeezus out of him... Finally, a chance to vent. Nice..._

"Then I suppose I'll have to get my hands dirty." The man sighed before examining his finger nails. "And I _just _got a manicure. Oh that is most unfortunate... Ah, well."

He had just finished making his second hand signal when voices reached them from a few dunes away calling Temari's name. For a moment, the kunoichi's concentration was broken, and she looked away from her assailant to a group of small children that were tugging Kankuro by both arms towards her. Remembering the weirdo, she turned back to where he should have been. Sand swirled in his empty place, and there was no trace of him anywhere. Her expression blanched. _Was it all a mirage? ...No way... Where did he go? _

She was starting to convince herself that she had imagined the whole thing when the corner of a white object caught her eye. Bending down, she brushed sand off the mask before examining it closely. It appeared to be an ordinary chujo mask, used to represent young aristocrats in plays. The only thing unique about it was a heart painted in sickening pink on the left cheek. Temari turned away, fighting back a nauseous feeling that was swelling up like a wave within her. She tucked the mask inside her sash, but could not shake the mental image of the creep and his mask. _It's his way of saying that he'll be back. One time or another. Tomorrow or next week. He will find me. _

The wind kunoichi shook the brief fear from her mind before narrowing her eyes and clenching her fists. _When and if he does, I'll be ready and waiting. _Several shrill, excited voices broke the sand nin out of her trance.

"Hey, Temari-sempai! We're gonna play ninja with Kankurou-sama, do you want to play too?" The ninja academy children smiled up at her innocently, obviously oblivious to what had just gone on. Temari's tough expression relaxed and she smirked at her brother, who was barely tolerating the kids. Kankurou rolled his eyes and mouthed the words 'Get out while you still can'. Temari laughed and crouched down by the kids. Surprisingly, unlike her brothers, she had a way with children.

"I have a meeting with the fifth Kazekage," The young Sunese looked down cast. "But, as soon as I'm done, I promise I'll come back." With that, the wind kunoichi rose and began walking back towards the village of Suna. Behind her she heard a yell as the young ninja took Kankurou's cat ear hat and ran away with it, the annoyed puppeteer in hot pursuit.

Lost in thought about her meeting with the mysterious man, Temari wandered through the archway of the city walls and into the bustling streets. Walking through the various roads and marketplaces, Temari could not help but notice the immense number of couples. They were frigging everywhere! Making out in doorways, groping each other on benches, whispering in each other's ears and laughing like idiots. _I guess animals aren't the only ones with a mating season. _

Despite her best attempt to tune them out, Temari was always watching the couples out of the corner of her eye, torturing herself with the thought of what it would be like to love someone and have them love her back. _Get the thought out of your head. It's not going to happen. _

The kunoichi looked up and found herself thankfully in front of the Kazekage's office building. Her eyebrows furrowed as she remembered the circumstances that had led to her scheduled meeting with Gaara. He had approached her after an incident involving a heavy golden cup, an awful dinner, and a suitor with severe head trauma. He had simply sighed and asked her to drop by later for a talk.

_I doubt that he's going to punish me... After all he gave me the right to choose my husband. Not to mention the fact that I'm his older sister. Ha, he knows he can't control me, and has never tried. It seems that he understands my situation at times, and yet he keeps herding more and more slovenly pig-men into my life. Meh, he still makes a hell of a better Kazekage than father did. _With that final thought, she opened the door to his office and sauntered in.

"You wanted to see me, Gaara?"

Gaara looked up from his desk and smiled slightly when he saw her. He motioned for her to sit down. By the way he fidgeted uncharacteristically, she could tell he was dealing with something that was completely foreign to him. He opened and closed his mouth several times before grunting and finally speaking.

"Yeah. As you know, right now is a difficult period in your life. I know that you are not fond of most of the suitors..." Temari snorted at this comment, temper rising slightly.

"At the moment, my top candidate is a forty-five year old, four hundred pound bald guy... Believe me, I am not fond of _any _of those fatheads..." Gaara narrowed his eyes slightly and she abruptly stopped speaking, sorry that she'd taken out her frustration on him.

The fifth Kazekage sighed and rubbed his temples, before continuing, choosing his words even more carefully.

"I know that I don't understand how you feel, but I think you are far overdue for a break..." Gaara trailed off as he caught sight of the white mask that poked out of Temari's sash. He nodded to it, a quizzical expression on his normally indifferent face.

"What's that?" Temari pulled the chujo mask out and handed it to Gaara, and gave him a troubled look.

"I had a 'meeting' with one of the suitors out in the desert. He wore this mask and did not identify himself. I don't know what would have happened if Kankurou and some kids hadn't come along... As soon as they were within earshot, the guy just up and disappeared, leaving this behind." Temari forced a smile as her brother examined the heart painted on a cheek. "You know how much I hate hot pink..." Gaara suppressed his rage at such a dishonor to his sister before speaking again.

"This is more serious than I thought. As I was saying, I think it is high time that you took a bit of a vacation..." At this Temari raised her eyebrows and grinned slightly.

"About time! Thank kami! So, where are we going?" Gaara pulled a paper from a drawer and held it out for her to see.

"Not we. Just you. And it's more of a temporary transfer."

Temari stared down in disbelief at the sheet of paper. It was a letter from the Hokage, approving Gaara's request that his sister live and work in Konoha for an indefinite amount of time. She slowly raised her vision to her brother before snarling.

"Konoha?!? But–" Gaara cut her off with an icy expression. Whenever Gaara got that look, he was adamant in his decision.

"If what you told me about the masked suitor is true, then it is best that you are sent someplace that is our ally, for both your comfort and your protection. A decoy caravan is setting off for the Land of Honey tomorrow morning. You will be traveling under the cover of darkness. I'm sending Kankurou and Baki to accompany you to Konoha, but you will be staying with some host family that Tsunade-sama has picked out." Temari sighed in resignation, unhappily looking down at her feet.

"So, I leave tomorrow night? Gaara nodded before rising and gently placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I promise that we'll visit whenever we can. It'll be tough to drag Kankurou away from his girlfriends and booze, but I think I just might be able to convince him to come." Temari smiled slightly, in spite of herself. Gaara and his sand could be _pretty _convincing at times.

"Well, I guess I should pack. I'll see you tomorrow Gaara." With that she left, wondering how she would survive in Konoha. She normally brimming with self confidence, but at the moment she felt she felt slightly worried.

_Every other time I've been there, I wasn't alone. Ugh, and no doubt I'll be grouped with the fifteen year olds. Hmm, I wonder if Tenten still hates my guts... And is Naruto still an irritating loudmouth? _

She stepped out of the building and into the dying light of the sunset. She casually glanced up and caught sight of something that surprised her. There, in the middle of the golden-red sky, a small cloud floated lazily, propelled by the slight breeze. _What was it I thought earlier? A cloud in Suna is as rare as... _Temari could barely stop herself from breaking down laughing at her own naiveté._ Oh, please. This isn't some dumb fairy tale. Get a hold of yourself. _

Temari shook her head. _Honestly. That would be so corny... Wait, what was it I promised to do? Oh right... the kids. Better make sure they haven't eaten Kankurou alive... or the other way around. _With that, the sand nin set out to look for her brother, giving the cloud no further thought.

**A/N: Well there's chapter two. I'll try to get number three up soon, but as you know the last week before school starts is somewhat hectic. Also, I know Gaara is a little bit out of character, but I imagine that he acts a little different around his family since his encounter with Naruto. Also, can somebody please tell me how to put more spaces in between the lines!!! It's driving me crazy...**


	3. Shikamaru the Sherpa

**A/N: Thank you to all my reviewers, especially sandgurlz, darkgal69, and **

**ShikaTema.rox.like.hell. This chapter took me a while to finish, since I am under **

**stress from being about to start school and having soccer tryouts EVERY SINGLE **

**DAY! With that said, R and R and enjoy chapter three of AoL.**

Sunlight bathed the bed in a golden glow, stirring the lazy chuunin from his peaceful sleep. Shikamaru grunted and shut his eyes tighter, rolling over and settling back into a comfortable position. It didn't last long, as a voice louder than a foghorn blared directly into his ear.

"RISE AND SHINE! Big day today."

Jumping two feet in the air, Shikamaru looked at his mother and blinked a few times before he regained the ability to speak. He glared down at her.

"I thought you agreed that you wouldn't sneak into my room and scare the living crap out of me anymore. Or was that only in my dreams?" he stopped and rubbed his chin. "And how is this day different from any other?"

"There is going to be a ninja from a Suna staying in Konoha for a while. They're going to be living with us." Shikamaru's jaw dropped and his eyebrows twitched.

"And you think to tell me this the day that they arrive? What's wrong with you, troublesome woman? Unnnnn."

"Don't talk to me like that. Now, get off your lazy ass and be down for breakfast in five minutes. Actually, make it ten. You need to clean up your room, the guest will be staying in here." She punctuated her remark by waving a ladle at him menacingly before exiting.

Shikamaru dragged himself from bed, wiping a small bit of drool from the corner of his mouth. Scratching his head, he surveyed the hopeless case that was his room. _Ugh. This is so troublesome._ He quickly got dressed in his black clothes and chuunin vest and crouched down next to the mound of clothes on the floor, having one last sentimental moment with it.

_Dear old mound o' stink, you've always been there for me, sitting in the middle of the floor... wait, why am I talking to clothes? _The bored teen grabbed the heaping pile of laundry and threw it in his hamper.

It had been two days since his dip in the river, and things were slowly starting to get back to normal. He still felt the occasional pang of jealousy whenever couples were around him, but nothing too bad.

He'd spent the last two days eating or just chilling with Chouji and playing shougi with Asuma. For some reason or another, he'd just felt annoyed whenever he thought of Ino.

Shikamaru finally gave up on trying to find a place for every thing in his room. _How troublesome. Hmm, I wonder... _

With a grunt, he simply lifted a pile of junk from under his bed and threw it in his closet, repeating the procedure until his room was relatively clean and his closet was stuffed. Muscles straining, he pushed against it with his back until it finally closed. He admired his handiwork and smiled lazily before heading downstairs.

As he entered the kitchen, he saw his father greedily eyeing the waffles in his place. "Not a chance, old man." Just as he sat down to eat, he heard his mother's irritating voice coming from the kitchen.

"Oh, and just to tell you, Shika, you're supposed to pick the suna ninja up at the gate in... ten minutes." She only smiled innocently as his eyes bugged out and he sprinted out of the house, pausing only to wolf down one waffle and call back a very loud and drawn out "Troublesome!"

Shikamaru ran through the streets, filled with inspiration for the first time in a while. _GAAAHHH. Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, CRAP! The Hokage will skin me alive if I screw something up with a foreign ninja village. Why did my mom tell me about this today?!? ...Kami, do you hate me? _

Finally, after fifteen minutes of record breaking sprinting, Shikamaru rounded a corner and came to the gate, sputtering and out of breath. Three figures came into sight. One was a grown man with a cloth that covered half of his face. The next was a teen, wearing a strange black suit, complete with a cat ear hat and purple face paint. The last was... Immediately Shikamaru's breath caught in his throat.

_No effing way... You don't hate me Kami, you're just on a mission to inflict a slow, painful death on me. Please don't let it be her... _As he was about to slink back the way he had come from, a voice acknowledged him.

"Oy, crybaby, are you the one who's hosting me? You're late... You wouldn't want the Hokage to hear about this, would you?" Kankurou and Baki both laughed as Shikamaru reluctantly approached them, shoulders slumped.

The two men said their goodbyes and leapt back into the forest, beginning the long journey home. With that, Temari turned back to Shikamaru, who was still staring sullenly at the ground. She felt a rush of annoyance.

"Look, I don't want to be here any more than you want me to. So just be a _good _boy, and I won't have to put you in a world of pain. Got it?" Temari ended her statement by throwing her bags at him, sending him flying backwards with an "oof".

He rose slowly and glared at her, but said nothing. _Living with mom and HER? This is gonna suck sooo bad... _Sighing, he decided it would be too troublesome to complain and hefted her bags over his shoulders. His knees buckled under their weight and he almost collapsed.

"Kami, what did you bring, your whole house?" She smirked at him. He could tell she was enjoying herself at his expense.

"Nah, only the west wing. I'm tired. Take me to your house... sherpa." Shikamaru continued to glower at her, but started struggling back home. The only interactions they shared on the way back were Temari's jabs whenever he stopped to rest.

"Come on, Pineapple-head, I thought you were a man." She laughed evilly as Shikamaru growled at her.

Finally, after an hour of back breaking work, Shikamaru collapsed on the front steps of his house, breathing heavily. Temari simply stepped over/on him and knocked on the door. Shikaku answered the door, a bored expression on his face. When he surveyed the scene before him, he broke into hysterical laughter.

He waved Temari inside after greeting her, before hauling his son up. Smirking at his son, he made a whipping motion before carrying the bags to the foot of the stairs.

"How are we going to survive with two women like that in the house?" Shikaku turned and grinned in response to his son's question.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I plan to hide in the bar for a while. Hell hath no fury like a kick-ass woman. Or in this case TWO kick-ass women. See ya!" Before he could complain, his father had scampered out the front door.

And so Shikamaru was left alone with numbers one and two on his "most troublesome women list." _Well I bet they'll get along just greaaat. Ok, do I know of any bomb shelters nearby? No... Oh what's the use. Anyways, a man doesn't run from women... What a drag..._

Shikamaru entered the kitchen to see that, sure enough, his mother and Temari were chatting like they'd been girlfriends since middle school.They had just prepared tea and were sipping it while talking casually.

"Well, Temari, I'm so glad there's another woman in the house. You have no idea what it's like to live with two unimaginative slackers... Shikamaru, would you be nice enough to show Temari to her room?"

The shadow manipulator had lived long enough with his mother to know that she did not make requests. She made demands, and if you did not follow them, you were in for fiery, agonizing demise. _Well, at least figuratively... most of the time._

Grumbling incoherently, Shikamaru beckoned Temari to follow him and headed upstairs. As soon as they entered the room, Temari had thrown herself onto the bed and was staring at the ceiling through sleepy eyes.

"So I get your room, eh Chuunin boy? I would have guessed cleaning was too troublesome for you..."

"As I recall, I made Chuunin before you did... old lady. And yes, I hate cleaning. Now go to sleep and leave me alone." Temari closed her eyes and only grumbled back, before falling asleep.

Shikamaru smirked at her and murmured a last piece of advice to her sleeping form.

"If I were you, I wouldn't open the closet door." He shut the door softly, not wanting to wreck the only hours of peace he'd have for a long while. _Hey wait... Where am I going to sleep? _

Filled with annoyance, Shikamaru crept down the stairs and into the kitchen, where Yoshino was washing dishes.

"Mom, where am I supposed to sleep while Temari is here? And just how long _is_ the sand witch staying?"

"How dare you talk about a woman like that! I'll have you know that Temari-chan is a very nice, strong young lady, and she may stay as long as she wants. While you're here you might as well help me with the dishes, got it? ...Shikamaru?"

Puzzled by the lack of complaint, she turned around to see that her son had vanished, leaving behind only a transparent outline. Yoshino just shook her head.

"Well, I suppose it's nice to see him actually motivated for a change..."

Meanwhile, Shikamaru was walking through the streets, hands shoved into his pockets, headed towards his father's favorite hang out place.

_If I were 20 I would be right beside him drinking right now. He's so lucky. _Lost in thought about how unfair his life was, Shikamaru didn't notice Chouji eating in a nearby cafe.

"Hey! Shikamaru! What's up? Something wrong? You look annoyed." The big boned teen motioned for Shikamaru to come sit with him. Shikamaru accepted, feeling slightly better.

"Hey Chouji. Did you hear that Suna sent a ninja over to stay for a while?" Chouji shook his head and said something not understandable between mouthfuls.

"Well they did, and the ninja's staying with me. One guess who it is..." Chouji stopped chewing and almost choked on a piece of beef as he laughed at his friends misfortune.

"Temari?" Shikamaru gave him a grim look, as if the world was about to come to an end.

"Temari." Chouji laughed some more and pounded a fist on the table.

"I bet your mom really likes her. Has she beaten you over the head with that fan yet?" Shikamaru did not share his friend's good humor.

"My mom treats her like a long-lost best friend. At least she hasn't hit me with the fan yet, but she was tired, so I wouldn't rule it out when I get back home." Chouji finally finished eating and rose, wiping barbecue sauce from his face. He frowned slightly.

"Damn, I just remembered. I promised to take Ino shopping." Chouji looked at the ground unhappily. "She keeps looking for something to impress Sasuke... And everything she wants costs so much..." Chouji snapped out of his slight depression and grinned again, prodding his friend in the ribs.

"Soooooo, Shikamaru... Is this finally going to be the time when you confess your undying love for Temari? Hee hee, are you two going to go on secret "missions" together?" A vein pulsated in Shikamaru's forehead and he threw his hands into the air.

"Oh yeah, that's really going to happen... I mean I'm just _crazy _about Temari no Sabaku!"

He spoke the second sentence louder than he'd meant to and cringed in embarrassment when everybody in the restaurant stopped talking and looked at him. Chouji grinned at him and started walking away.

"I knew it... anyways, see you later!" Shikamaru groaned and cradled his head in his hands, cheeks flushed red. _Oh man, I can't believe I just said that... I'll never live this down... And to think, Chouji claims to know me better than anyone else. _

Shikamaru's thoughts were interrupted when the owner of the restaurant came out, brandishing a cutting knife. Despite the fact that they were in Japan, the man spoke with a distinct Brooklyn accent (A/N This is of absolutely no importance to the story, I just like being random sometimes...).

"Hey, kid. I know you're in love or something, but that don't really matter to me. Buy something or get lost!" Shikamaru stared sullenly at the man, but decide to leave anyways.

Looking up, Shikamaru saw to his surprise that the sun was starting to go down. _Wow, I survived my first day with Temari. Never mind that she was asleep for the whole time... Well, I should probably get dad and go home for dinner. Wouldn't want mom to have to drag dad home by the ear._

After about five minutes of walking, Shikamaru came to Shikaku, Chouza, and Inoichi's favorite hangout. Shikamaru gagged as the rank smell of booze and beer nuts invaded his nostrils. _I don't understand how they can take it... I can't believe I wanted to be here about an hour ago..._

By the way the men swayed in their seats and laughed rowdily, Shikamaru could tell they were drunk of their rockers. _Shit. No doubt mom is going to find some way to pin this on me... _Chouza turned and, between hiccups, hailed Shikamaru.

"YEAH! REINFORCEMENTS! WOOHOO! TAKE A SEAT, BOY!" As Inoichi passed out face down in a bowl of nuts, Shikaku pounded his son on the back.

"It's good to finally see you here with us, Shikamaru. How old are you now? Seventeen? Eighteen?" _Damn, he brings a whole new meaning to the word 'wasted'._

"Dad. It's almost dinnertime. You know what Mom will do if we're late..." Abruptly, Shikaku's eyes lost their drunken haze and he sobered up. A fearful expression briefly passed over his face.

"Got to go, Chouza. See you Inoichi. Same time tomorrow?" Chouza grunted in response, while Inoichi simply gurgled. _Does that mean yes? _Shikaku grinned back at them before following his son out the door.

They jogged home, not wanting to incur Yoshino's deadly wrath. Halfway there, Shikaku started looking strangely at his son.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" Shikaku sighed before returning his gaze to his son's face.

"Shikamaru, what do you think of Temari?" Shikamaru thought about it for a split second before replying.

"Well... To start off, she's aggressive, annoying, loud, and just downright troublesome. But I suppose those are all parts of being a strong woman." Shikaku gave a small smile and closed his eyes.

"That's what I thought you might say." Shikamaru was starting to get very annoyed. _What's that supposed to mean?_

"What do you mean by that?" Shikaku opened one eye and glanced sideways at the fifteen year old, the knowing smile still on his face.

"Well Shikamaru, I know you think that I'm crazy for marrying your mother, but it runs in the Nara blood. There's something about strong women that catches our eye, and even though we might deny it at first, but one thing leads to another and eventually you may find yourself taking the 'troublesome' woman to bed..." Shikamaru let out a cry of disgust and put his hands over his ears.

"LALALALALALA I'M NOT LISTENING! Dad! I am not attracted to her at all! She's just a loudmouthed sand-witch!" Shikaku smirked and pointed at Shikamaru's face.

"You're _blushing._" He then clasped his hands to the side of his head and spoke in a falsetto."Oh, Temari!"

Shikamaru only grumbled, thankful that their house had come into sight.

"You are so childish..."

As they entered the house, Yoshino was just setting food down on the table. She looked up and smiled sweetly at them.

"Oh good, you're here. If you'd been two minutes later..." There was no need for her to finish her sentence as both Nara men gulped visibly. _No way I'm marrying a girl anything like Mom..._

As they sat down, Shikamaru realized that there were only three place settings. _No Temari? Is my luck actually starting to change?_ Puzzled, he looked at his mother.

"Where's Temari? She didn't go out or anything, did she?" Yoshino looked up and smiled slightly.

"No, she's still asleep. It's a long journey from Suna and I don't think she's slept in two days. Why do you ask? Are you concerned?"

"Nope, not at all. Just curious."

The rest of dinner passed in relative silence, until Yoshino scooped some left overs onto a plate and handed it to Shikamaru. She pointed upstairs and motioned for him to go.

"Take this up to Temari. I'd imagine she's starving."

Muttering under his breath, Shikamaru crept up the stairs towards his room. Once he reached the closed door, all he heard was quiet breathing. He gently knocked twice before opening the door. Temari lay sleeping, curled up under the covers.

She had taken off the clothes she had traveled in and was wearing a silk shirt. Shikamaru could not see and had no wish to see if she was wearing any pants. _She looks much more gentle in sleep than she does when she's awake..._

Temari mumbled softly in her sleep, making Shikamaru jump_. I'd hate to see what she'd do to me if she caught me watching her like this. _Moved by something he didn't quite understand, the Chuunin set her plate of food down on the bedside table, never once taking his eyes off her

sleeping form. When he was done he tip toed back to the open door, and turned around one last time.

"Goodnight Temari." He murmured softly. He closed the door and slipped downstairs, puzzling over how he felt towards Temari.

**A/N: Thanks for reading chapter three! I'll get the next one up as soon as I can. Review!**


	4. Midnight Snacks and Hard Floors

**A/N: Ugh... the first week of high school... Troublesome doesn't even begin to cut it... Well, I had to work hard, but FINALLY here is chapter four. They might be slightly OOC, and this chapter ended up kind of emotional. I'm just setting the plot in motion. As for updates, I am aiming for at least one update every week, and goddammit I'm gonna try, but if I'm swamped, I don't know what's gonna happen. Anyways, thanks to all of you who've reviewed, because every time I get a review, I feel inspired to write. YAY **

Grumbling, Temari opened her eyes. Yawning sleepily, she stretched and rubbed her eyes. After her brain had booted up, she remembered where she was. She scratched her head and realized she'd forgotten to take out her hair ties while she was sleeping.

_Ugh... Comfy bed though... Damn, I'm hungry... How long was I asleep? _Rising, she opened the drapes and stared out into the early morning sky. It was about four in the morning and the sun was yet to peek the tip of it's head over the horizon. Just looking outside, Temari felt a pang of homesickness.

_I already miss Suna. There were beautiful sunrises there... ugh, how am I going to pass the time here? _Opening the window, Temari leaned out, head resting in one hand.

Here in this strange village, she felt more alone than she ever had before. Cool air blew across her face, and crickets chirped in the grass beneath her, but it wasn't the same as her beloved desert.

The serene moment was ruined as Temari's stomach let loose a monstrous growl, shaking her very frame. _Right, I haven't eaten in almost two days. _Temari paused as she noticed an aroma that smelled like beef and noodles.

Turning around, she hunted around for the source of the smell._ Mmm something smells gooooood. _Unable to stop herself from drooling, Temari followed the scent to a plate of food on the bed side table. Casting away the little self restraint she possessed, the sand nin wolfed down the leftovers, but still could not shake the feeling of hunger.

_Ugh, if Kankurou were here he'd be laughing at me... _Collapsing backwards onto the bed, Temari stared at the ceiling, as her brain struggled vehementally with her stomach. Finally the stomach delivered a dropkick to the brain, and she made her decision._ No doubt it's rude, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to perform an S ranked mission in Konoha. Operation: Raid the Fridge and Get a Midnight Snack... commence. _

With that, Temari slipped down the stairs, creeping so as not to wake her hosts. _Shikamaru would never let it go if he caught me doing this... _She envisioned Shikamaru smirking and lecturing her on how 'a woman shouldn't do such a thing.' The troublesome woman paused at the base of the stairs and struggled with herself until finally giving in.

_Ah fuck it. I'm hungry... And it would serve Shikamaru right if I woke him up... _Oblivious to the form sleeping on the couch, Temari opened the refrigerator door and took out a mound of leftovers, piling them on her plate. As she turned to sit at the table, her heart nearly stopped when she heard a soft snore followed by a thump and cursing.

Across the room from her, Shikamaru had rolled off the couch while sleeping, but was still unaware of her presence and was quietly swearing his heart out. _Oh shit... I forgot he was gonna sleep here... Damn he scared me... _Quickly regaining her composure, Temari smirked and waved a fork at him, munching on her midnight snack.

"Smooth. You must be a real hit with the ladies, huh?" This time it was his turn to be surprised as he fell backwards from the couch he had just gotten back up onto. He popped up again, angrily rubbing the back of his head. He scowled at her in annoyance.

"You know this floor is hard... Not to mention, why are you up at..." Shikamaru craned his neck so he could see the clock behind her. "4:30 in the morning. You know, other people need to sleep too. _Some _of us didn't spend the whole day sleeping like a baby..."

Temari's retort caught in her throat when she realized he didn't have his hair up in a top knot. It hung down to his shoulders, in away that made him look kinda sexy. Luckily for her hormones, he had a night shirt and sweat pants on. _ He looks much different... _

Swallowing her surprise and ignoring his comment, Temari casually brushed a strand of short sandy hair out of her eyes and nodded to his mane of sorts.

"You look better with your hair down. A little bit like a girl, but that's still an improvement." She thought she saw him blush for a moment, but dismissed it as a trick of the dark. He rolled his eyes and stifled a yawn.

"You just couldn't leave it as a compliment, could you?" Bored expression plastered on his face, he vaulted himself over the side of the couch, landing in front of her. He took a seat across from her and stared glumly at the wall.

"You're getting up now? I didn't think of you as the type to be an early riser..." He yawned again and looked at her with surprisingly alert eyes.

"Eh, I don't sleep much. Especially not on a couch." He glanced sideways at her and smiled coyly. "Plus, you make a lot of noise when you're eating. I'd never be able to go back to sleep. Very unladylike..."

_Not again... He makes me sooo angry! _Temari reached forwards and smacked him upside the head, before settling non-chalantly back into her seat. _Ahh, much better. _She pretended to be very interested in her fingernails.

"Watch it Crybaby. Wouldn't want to start a war, would you?" He stared at her in disbelief before suprising her by chuckling.

"You'd start a war just because I called you unladylike? Pfff... women."

Intent on changing the subject before she let her anger go and ripped off his head, Temari went on the offensive. _My turn to piss him off..._

"Sooo... do you hang out a lot with Sasuke Uchiha? I hear he's a hunksicle... When do I get to meet him?" Judging by the momentary spasm and slight frown, she'd hit upon a nerve. He hid it quickly, and leaned back in his chair, eyes closed.

"If you're looking to join the fanclub, I suggest you get your application in right away. I think there's a pretty damn long line... As for me, I have trouble stomaching him." Rubbing his temples, the leaf nin frowned. Grinning fiendishly, Temari went for the kill. She stuck her lip out and crossed her arms.

"Seems you're not a big Sasuke fan. Jealous, are we, Mr. Loser?" His eyes shot open, and she stopped talking, regretting for once, what she'd said. Instead of the anger she'd expected and wanted, he had had a completely different reaction.

For a moment, she thought she saw a look of extreme hurt in his eyes, before it disappeared, to be replaced by resigned deadness.

_I went too far. Shit, I was just messing with him... I just hope he doesn't cry again... _

At a loss for words, Temari started to reach out to him, but he drew back and rose, eyes hidden by long hair. She looked up at him, filled with a concern she didn't think she had for him.

"Listen, I didn't mean it like that..." _Well, then how did I mean it? _He shook his head and looked out the window.

"It's fine. I'm not gonna pretend that I'm not a loser." His gaze returned to her and relaxed a little when he saw no sarcasm or malevolence in her eyes. They stayed there in awkward silence until he sighed.

"Alright, I'm up. Let me get dressed and then I'll show you around Konoha or something." Pausing, he turned around and, staring at the ground, cleared his throat. _What's his problem?_

"Umm, I'm sorry to ask, believe me, I am... But, you didn't leave any uhhh... personal... _garments _on the ground did you?"

Temari puzzled over what he meant for a few seconds before frowning menacingly at him. _Well at least he's feeling better..._

"No, I didn't. Don't go looking for them, got it?" She threateningly pointed to her fan, which still lay at the bottom of the stairs. Shikamaru laughed nervously, putting up his hands in defense.

"Hey, just trying to keep my Not-Getting-Beaten-To-A-Pulp-By-Fans streak alive. You wouldn't believe how hard that actually is..." Temari narrowed her eyes at him.

"I'm watching you..."

She smirked and pointed to his head."And your hair is still down." Shikamaru rolled his eyes in annoyance before disappearing back up the stairs. Temari settled back into her chair, smiling slightly at her victory. _Maybe things won't be so bad here... _

About five minutes later, Shikamaru came down the stairs, dressed in his normal attire with his hair tied up. Signature bored expression on his face, he made a "quiet" signal and pointed to the door.

Temari slung her fan into its carrying pouch before following him out into the brisk morning air. Shikamaru turned and beckoned around him before shrugging his shoulders.

"Well, it's five in the morning. There's not much to do... anyplace you want to see?"

Temari thought for a minute before shaking her head.

"Not really. Konoha bores me, to tell the truth." Shikamaru shook his head and sighed in exasperation.

"I can't believe you woke me up for this. Troublesome woman. And I don't see how you can prefer a plain, hot desert to this." Temari felt her blood start to boil and instinctually reached for her fan. _How dare he insult Suna?!? His streak won't last if he keeps this up._

"No clouds in Suna... It would bore even me." _That does it. _

Giving in to her impulse, Temari drew her fan and hit him across the head with it, knocking him face first onto the ground. He lay there sputtering before turning over and dazedly staring up at her.

Wincing, he tenderly rubbed the large welt that was already rising on his head. When the befuddled look left his eyes, he scowled at her, before whispering through clenched teeth.

"I hate you with the very core of my being."

She laughed and hauled him up by his collar so that they were face to face.

"If I had my way, I wouldn't even be here." Sighing, she looked down the street. "Just show me where the normal Konoha dweebs hang out. Got it, Pineapple head?" As she turned around to wait for his response, she saw how close she had brought him to her, and that he was staring at her in bewilderment.

"Right... Sorry." She couldn't help but blush slightly as she released him. _Even if he's just fifteen, he's better looking than most of my suitors... But looks don't change things. He's still a boring, annoying crybaby. So there... Why am I arguing with myself? _

Rubbing the back of his head in annoyance, Shikamaru shot her one last death glare before starting to walk aimlessly down the street, hands deep in the confines of his black pant pockets. As the sand nin jogged after him to catch up, he waved a hand wearily towards various dark storefronts.

"Let's see... That's were Naruto and Hinata had their first date. You could tell Naruto loves her by the way _he _actually treated someone else to all-you-can-eat ramen."

Temari giggled slightly, causing Shikamaru to look at her like she was covered with ants. She furrowed her eyebrows in response.

"What? Is it against the law for me to giggle? And no, I haven't been replaced by an enemy ninja..." _I just wish someone would do something like that for me..._

Shikamaru searched her eyes for a moment before continuing on farther down the street.

The odd couple walked side by side, with Shikamaru recounting various funny stories about some of the places.

"... and that's where Ino has her boyfriends take her for weekly anniversaries. Well... in the cases of the ones that last more than a week."

Temari snorted in response, imagining the other blonde sitting in one of the seats in the same position, with scores of boyfriends coming and going. _She seemed like that kinda girl... _

In spite of herself, Temari found that she was enjoying the tour. _When Shikamaru's not half asleep, he can be funny. Too bad that doesn't happen very often..._ Meanwhile, As Shikamaru passed a certain restaurant, Temari noticed the leaf chuunin stiffen slightly. Despite his reaction, he gave no explanation, and instead just strolled on, looking straight ahead.

Curiosity getting the better of her, the wind kunoichi stopped and put her hands on her hips. Shikamaru turned around to look quizzically at her. She pointed to the building.

"What's wrong? Don't pretend you didn't just flinch. What happened there?" Shikamaru turned around and feigned innocence.

" Huh? I didn't flinch. Troublesome woman... But I'm glad to see you care so much..." Temari saw right through his fake smirk and just cocked her head to the side and waited, arms crossed. Finally the fifteen year old sighed and kicked a rock from the middle of the street, sending it flying into a lamp post.

"Fine, you really want to know? I told you it's nothing, just where the Sasuke fan rallies usually take place. He does some kind of sick raffle to choose who's "lucky enough" to be his date. Even so, most of the girls in Konoha are crazy about him."

Temari looked at him in disbelief, before breaking down laughing. _What a creep. _Shikamaru turned around to stare at her, trying to discern whether she was laughing at him or at something else.

Shaking her head, Temari stopped laughing and looked at him with piercing teal eyes. She smirked slightly, causing him to cock an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, I just realized that Konoha is even more ridiculous then I thought. Weak ninja, swarms of fangirls _and _narcissistic jerks. Bleh, I can't believe I wanted Sasuke the first time I saw him."

She could see that Shikamaru was relieved, but he hid it by sticking out his tongue and making a retching sound.

"Too much information... and we're not _that_ weak."

After one strange, fleeting glance at Temari, Shikamaru rubbed the back of his neck and closely examined the lightening sky. The sun was just starting to rise, and they'd been out a good hour and a half.

After a few seconds, his brown orbs returned their alert gaze to her, and he motioned with his head in the general direction of his house. She nodded in agreement, and they wordlessly drifted through the empty streets, happy just with each other's company. As they walked in silence, birds began to twitter, and the first rays of sunlight were reflecting off the early morning dew.

When they finally arrived back at the Nara doorstep, the village was beginning to wake from the dead, and the smell of frying bacon reached them as they stepped through the doorway. Even though she had eaten a short while ago, Temari's appetite reawakened.

Shikamaru however, made a move for the stairs, yawning and scratching his head. Angry to be left without a farewell, Temari put her hands on her hips and cleared her throat noisily. Shikamaru turned for a moment and raised his eyebrows in innocence.

"Well?" His innocence turned to annoyance and he snapped back.

"Well, what?" Temari glared at him.

"Well, where are you going? It's not polite to leave a guest standing in the hallway, especially when you're just wandering off somewhere without telling me. You're supposed to be my guide."

Shikamaru exhaled slowly, controlling his irritation. Finally, he straigthened up and put his feet together. _Seriously, when did he get so tall? _Rolling his eyes, he lifted his chin to make himself look snooty.

"Would her majesty mind if her humble servant took a shower? Or does she need a guide to find the kitchen for her?" Temari snorted and waved him away, to which he mockingly bowed and stiffly walked up the stairs.

As she sat down at the kitchen table and greeted Yoshino, she couldn't help but think of her early morning and walk with Shikamaru. Even now, she wasn't sure if she'd enjoyed the morning, or despised it _What a weird guy..._

**Thus ends chapter four! Yeah, I'm not sure if I like this chapter or not, but I am determined to finish this story. I have no idea how many chapters are left, but it's not close to being over. Oh and for all of you who are thinking "OMG TEMARI ATE SO MUCH!!! WHAT A PIG!" I urge you to go two days without eating anything and see how you feel. (I did it once, and it was no fun.) Thanks for reading, now review!!!**


	5. A Bad Day

**A/N: Well, I had like five tests the second week of school, so this was hard to write, but I managed. I really like part of this chapter, but other parts kinda suck... Anyways, I would really like to thank all of you that reviewed, especially the ones that have reviewed every chapter so far . R&R!**

Water once again flowed all around him. This time it was warm instead of frigid, but it had a similar effect, calming his confused mind. As he coursed his shampooed fingers through his long hair, his mind wandered over what had happened already that day.

He hadn't been lying when he said he didn't sleep much, but that was because his mother always dragged him out of bed at ungodly hours.

No, for some reason, something in him had inspired him to get up, providing a motivation he usually did not have. Also, even though he called himself a loser quite often, and didn't really mind when Ino called him one, when the L-word had escaped Temari's lips, he'd felt different.

No indifference, no playful annoyance. He'd felt something like a crushing disappointment, like Rock Lee or Neji had punched him in the stomach.

He had no idea why, but it had hurt so much more when she had said it. Lost in thought, Shikamaru leaned his head and a hand against the wall of the shower and just looked down at the whirlpool created by the drain. Water streamed from his chin, ears and nose, falling downward in slow motion.

_Why do I care so much? There's no way in hell someone like me could love someone like her. It just wouldn't work. She'd rip my head off before we were even down the wedding aisle._

Finally, Shikamaru broke out of his trance, and remembered what had come after the pain. He was still unsure of it, but he thought he had seen actual concern and remorse in her eyes, but that seemed a little unlike her. _She's a kick-ass girl. That, there's no denying. Hmm, I wonder if there's more to her that I could see? _

Shikamaru stomped on his inner self, angry at his own optimism. _Baka! She doesn't feel that way about me, and even if she did, she's WAY too troublesome to be worth a relationship with. I'm not attracted to her at all._

Inner Shikamaru just smiled a knowing smile and shrugged his shoulders. _Keep thinking what you want... It will just make things more... er... entertaining. Besides, if you don't find her attractive, then how do you explain your southern region's reaction when she grabbed you?_

Blood rushed to Shikamaru's face as he remembered when Temari had hauled him up after hitting him with her fan. He was just really glad that she'd been too embarrassed to notice the tent he'd pitched.

However, Shikamaru was quick on his feet when it came to wits, and he parried his inner self's verbal attack. _Cheh, I would've had the same reaction to almost any girl grabbing me like that. _Inner Shikamaru just smirked before disappearing, leaving Shikamaru back in the shower.

Rubbing his temples, Shikamaru realized that the water had gotten cold, and that he had no idea how long he'd been in the shower. He finished up, and stepped shivering onto the tiled bathroom floor. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he hopped quickly to the door, eager to get into warm, dry clothes.

He opened the doorway and sped through it, not bothering to look at what was on the other side. At the last second he saw a blond girl out of the corner of his eye and hopped to the side, narrowly avoiding a collision with her. Unfortunately, his momentum still carried him farther and he went crashing face first into a wall.

As he rubbed his head and groaned painfully, Shikamaru saw with great relief that the towel still clung stubbornly to his waist. _Thank Kami for that... _Rising gingerly, he turned to see Temari staring at him in shock. When she saw he hadn't killed himself, she burst down, laughing hysterically.

Rubbing his nose, Shikamaru turned to escape into his room and get clothes. As he slammed the door, he still heard Temari's laugh echoing through the hallway. Looking in the mirror, the leaf nin saw the furious blush that played across his face. Embarrassed beyond all belief, Shikamaru pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled slowly, collecting himself.

Presently, he looked up from beneath his wet hair at his own reflection. Shikamaru bleakly scowled at himself. _Why am I such a loser? How could I be such a fucking moron in front of her? _Shikamaru stared at Shikamaru, and Shikamaru stared right back at Shikamaru. Both shrugged at the other. Neither knew the answer.

Sighing, he remembered the bacon his mom had been cooking. _For all I know Temari already ate it all. Better hurry before the old man gets the rest. _Shikamaru speedily put on his clothes and walked gloomily out of his room. As he trudged out of his room, a throaty laugh met him.

Sitting with her back against the wall he had crashed into, the troublesome woman was watching him, characteristic smirk on her face. Shikamaru did not fail to notice the way she crossed and uncrossed her long legs. _Good thing I just took a cold shower..._ _Why is she still here? ... Probably just wants to rub it in my face..._

As he glared at her angrily, she smiled innocently and came slowly towards him, holding something behind her back. Unwilling to show that he was rattled by his collision with the wall, Shikamaru stoically stood his ground.

"What do you want? Or do you just enjoy scaring the living shit out of people and making them run into walls?" _Oooh, that was clever... Well put, Shikamaru... _ Shikamaru sarcastically thought.

Temari continued towards him, smiling almost seductively.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was a custom in Konoha to come sprinting out of bathrooms at high speed with only a towel on. I'm so sorry if I offended you, _your grace_."

Shikamaru's discomfort mounted as Temari got closer and closer, She eventually paused with her face a few inches from his. Even though she'd just been eating, her breath smelled fresh, and a shiver went up his spine every time warm air tickled his nose.

Finally, after what seemed like hours of agony, she leaned forwards and whispered in his ear.

"You were showering for almost 45 minutes, so you missed breakfast. I decided to bring you something tasty, though..."

Shikamaru could not contain the sweat that poured from every pore on his body. Her body was just centimeters from his, and it was teasingly getting just a little bit closer every second. Shikamaru could not even summon the brain power to push her away. _She's so close..._

"Really? What m-might _that _b-be?" His voice cracked as there was just the tiniest bit of friction between their bodies.

"Don't get your hopes up. It's just bacon." She stepped back as his jaw dropped and took a plate out from behind her back. She was suddenly back to her normal self, laughing at the expression on his face. Stammering, Shikamaru took the plate and looked dumbly down at it.

"Your mom told me how you brought me up food last night, so I offered to bring some up for you. Didn't expect a bad outtake, but I enjoyed the show. You should've seen the look on your face. Pfff..._ Genius."_

As Temari gave him one last smirk before returning down the stairs, Shikamaru only stared after her. He felt relieved in a way, but another side of him felt deep disappointment. Running a shaking hand through his hair, Shikamaru sank back against the wall.

_It's a REALLY good thing I just took a cold shower. ...How can I let her do something like that to me? I need to find some way to get back at her. But I can wait. Patience is a virtue I don't lack. As for now... bacon time._

As soon as he'd finished the meal, Shikamaru carried the dirty plate down to the kitchen where his mother and Temari were clearing the table. As the sound of his footsteps reached them, Temari turned around and gave him an impish grin. Thankfully, his mother did not notice it.

"Shikamaru! What did I tell you about our water bill? With a lazy-ass as a father and provider, we aren't drowning in money. Now, why don't you start washing dishes. You know, in the day she's been here, I think Temari has done more chores than you have this entire year!"

Shikamaru gritted his teeth and decided it would be too troublesome to argue. Just as the first pile of greasy silverware was thrown into the sink, Shikaku came sauntering in. His face was all business.

"Shikamaru, the Hokage wants to see all of the Konoha twelve in her office, something about a mission to see how you work together." Shikamaru barely stopped himself from pumping a fist in the air, or even dancing. _Never have I been so happy to get a mission..._ Shikaku saw Shikamaru's thinly veiled reaction, and smirk took the place of his serious expression. He turned to address the Sunese ambassador.

"Temari, you're going with them, as a part of Team 10. Apparently, the Kazekage doesn't want your ninja skills to get rusty. Have fun, you two. I'm gonna leave before I get stuck with sweeping the kitchen."

With that, Shikamaru's dad vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving Temari and Shikamaru eying each other in annoyance, and Yoshino fuming. The grown woman turned muttering back to the dishes.

"I swear. Why the hell did I choose a lazy ass for a husband..." When she had finished complaining to herself, Yoshino faced Shikamaru and Temari and waved them away.

"Go, go, go. I'll finish cleaning up. Wouldn't want you to be late for a meeting with the Hokage herself." Temari started to protest, but Shikamaru dragged her away before his mother changed her mind.

As soon as they were out the door, he let go of her hand. She grinned playfully at him, but he only scowled back sullenly, before setting the pace towards the Hokage's office. Temari struggled to keep up and quickly became agitated at his silence. Finally, she'd had enough.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You act like I killed your puppy or something..."

Shikamaru just glanced sideways at her, unsure exactly why he was pissed off at her. Temari was seething by now, and brandished her fan. Her voice dropped to a menacing, low tone.

"Tell me..."

Shikamaru, ever the calm and controlled type, felt the anger boil up inside of him and something snapped. Barely able to stop himself from screamin, he turned and, glaring fiercely, let loose.

"Well to start off, you're always like that; a bossy jerk. You can never leave me alone, you always have to know what I'm thinking, and when I do tell you what I'm thinking, we either argue, or you just hit me with that ridiculous metal fan of yours. And what the hell happened back there? You come up, all flirtatious and open, disturb me, then just up and go, laughing, at the last moment, leaving me to feel like supreme commander of the Shithead army. There's nothing wrong with _me _at the moment... That's what's wrong with _you, _Temari."

No matter how mad he got, Shikamaru refused to use the word bitch, thinking it was unmanly to use such words on a woman, even if she deserved them.

Temari looked like she'd been slapped. _Will she just leave it alone now? ...What am I saying, of course she won't... _As he'd predicted, as soon as the shock of Shikamaru losing his cool had subsided, Temari was right back in his face, screaming aggressively.

"MY FAN IS NOT STUPID! If you want me to leave you alone about your feelings, fine I will, but you can't act like you don't have any vocal chords all the time. NOT TO MENTION–"

Shikamaru cut her off with an impatient wave of his hand. They had arrived at the building in which the Hokage kept her office. Temari's face turned red from anger, but she stopped talking.

As they walked through the halls, both refused to look at the other. After what seemed like forever, they arrived at the Hokage's door. Heads turned as the pair stomped in and traveled to different sides of the room. When Shikamaru settled next to Chouji, his friend gave him a grin.

"I see you two are on great terms, huh?" Shikamaru snorted and glared at him.

"Shut up, and eat your snacks."

Meanwhile, Temari was standing as far away from Shikamaru as she could, positioned between Sakura and Naruto. Sakura was too busy making googly eyes at Sasuke to notice the sand nin, but, much to Temari's dismay, Naruto had decided to strike up a conversation with her.

"Hey! hey! Temari! When did you get here? Who are you staying with? I bet it's Shikamaru- attebayo..."

As the noisy blond kid elbowed her in the ribs playfully, Temari decided she'd had enough. Turning, she smirked slightly at him. Pointing with one hand, she tapped her chin with the other.

"Isn't Hinata right over there? Shouldn't you be fawning over her or something?" Temari put the back of her hand on her forehead and swooned mockingly. "Oh Naruto-kun!"

Naruto's face became crimson and he turned away, sputtering lame excuses. As Temari crossed her arms in satisfaction, yet another loud blonde appeared.

Ino brushed past Temari, not giving her a second glance, before running to Chouji and Shikamaru and letting loose a torrent of the latest gossip. Shikamaru sighed and tried to listen as closely as he could, but Ino was talking too fast, and he really didn't care about her new shoes or how so-and-so were dating. _Still, it's better than spending time with the Controlfreak-Witch of the desert... Is Hokage-same really going to put her with us?_

Even as Shikamaru was lost in his dreary thoughts, words continued to spill out of Ino.

"Oh my god! Did you see Sasuke look at me when I was walking over here? He totally liked what he saw! I can't believe he's going to be going on a mission with us!"

Both Chouji and Shikamaru frowned and rolled their eyes in unison, before Chouji spoke out.

"Um, you do know that the whole Konoha twelve is going on this mission, right? Speaking of which, does anybody know what this mission is?" Chouji paused to feel his stomach with concern. "And any idea what kind of food we'll get?"

As his best friends blathered on, Shikamaru just stood in silence, nodding when he felt he was supposed to. He couldn't help but notice that Temari was now standing all by herself, even though it didn't seem to affect her. _What? Am I supposed to be sorry for what I said? She had it coming, threatening people with that metal fan of hers. Pfff, troublesome woman..._

At last, the Hokage entered, more than a little bit unsteadily. _Oh for kami's sake, is she wasted _again_? Tsunade-sama really needs help. _As Tsunade collapsed into her seat, frowning and rubbing her head furiously, she noticed that the chattering had ceased and that everyone was staring at her. Eyebrow twitching in annoyance, the Hokage spoke.

"I know what you're thinking, and no, I'm not drunk. I'm hungover. There's a damn difference, which I'd really love to explain if we had the time. We don't. Ok, so..." Tsunade bridged her fingertips and closed her eyes, obviously unhappy to be carrying out a mission briefing while she had a pounding head ache.

"The reason I have summoned you here, is for a special mission." Naruto jumped up and down and raised his hand in childish excitement.

"Yes Naruto, it _will_ be important and full of action." When Naruto still had his hand raised and was now jumping from foot to foot, Tsunade snapped at him angrily.

"What now? I already told you it won't be boring!"

Naruto's face flushed again and he rubbed the back of his neck.

"I know, I know Baa-chan... I just have to go to the bathroom..." Some people groaned, while others laughed at Naruto's sheepish statement, but Shikamaru and Temari just locked eyes and glared at each other, both unwilling to apologize to the other.

After Naruto had returned from his trip to the men's room, Tsunade continued from where she'd left off.

"Anyways, as I was saying, before I was interrupted..." Tsunade cast a glare of annoyance at the holder of the Kyuubi for good measure.

"You will all be going on a mission together. This mission is B ranked, and requires a fairly large number of ninja, so I decided that we would send you, the most promising of our young ninja together, so as to evaluate the team skills you have developed when fighting in larger groups than teams of three." Tsunade paused and winced as a particularly painful throb broke her concentration.

"Erg... Anyways, you will all be accompanying a large caravan from here to the land of lightning. Normally this would be assigned to a jonin and a squad of genin, but this particular caravan happens to have a very valuable cargo. The Raikage has placed an order for new weapons, created here in Fire Country. By delivering them safely, we will be taking one step closer to having the war between Lightning and Fire forgotten. Our ANBU scouts have not detected any plotting to attack the caravan, but there is always a political motive in situations like these. The caravan drivers will provide food and tents for you."

Tsunade paused and looked sternly at Ino, who was watching Sasuke intently. "Ahem, you will be sleeping with your _normal_ team..." Shikamaru watched in annoyance as Ino looked crestfallen and Sakura made the victory sign. Tsunade ignored them and continued.

"Also, as most of you have noticed by now, Temari of the Desert has been staying in our village with the Naras for the past day and a half. She will be accompanying Team 10." Eyes turned to Temari and some greetings were exchanged. Tsunade, obviously wanting to get rid of the Chuunin so she could sleep off her hang over, pounded a hand on her desk for order.

"SHUT UP! Ok... thank you. One last thing. Just be at the Konoha gate at ten A.M. tomorrow."

With that, people began filing out of the room, eager to escape the wrath of the Hokage. Temari was forced to wait for Shikamaru and the rest of Team 10 because she didn't know the way back to his house. As they approached, Chouji gave her a friendly nod, Ino examined her clothing, and Shikamaru just stared straight by her.

Just as they had left the room, Tsunade leaned her head just outside the door and screamed down the hallway.

"SHIZUNE! WHERE DID YOU PUT THE DAMN TYLENOL?!?" Chouji and Ino had to run around the corner before laughing at their leader's exclamation, but Shikamaru and Temari just walked on gloomily.

Stepping back out into the lazy summer air, the group of four went their separate ways, leaving Shikamaru alone with Temari again. Neither of them were looking forward to the next several days. Maybe if they hadn't been too caught up in their anger, they might have noticed a tall man in a strange mask watching them from the shadows.

**A/N Yeah I know the last couple pages kinda suck, but I felt like all of you that have read and reviewed deserve at least one chapter a week. Thanks for reading chapter five, and I have the next few chapters planned out pretty well, so I should have another update up next sunday. REVIEW!!!**


	6. Peeping

**A/N Yay! Chapter 6! Another tough week of High School (my Modern World teacher is insane)... K, anyways, the first half of this chapter is kinda meaningless fluff, but the mission gets underway next chapter. I'd like to dedicate this chapter to all the people who keep reviewing, especially Haileyamander, Babikitti, and Darkgal69, who all gave me a lot of feedback and basically inspired me to write. Thanks, now R&R!!!**

The rest of the day had been passed uneventfully, with Shikamaru slipping off to wherever it was he went all the time, leaving Temari to wander around Konoha, looking at various shops and restaurants.

Unfortunately, she'd gotten lost somewhere along the way and had been unable to find her way back to the Nara's house until about 8:30 at night. As if that hadn't been bad enough, the sunny weather of Konoha had faltered, and it had started raining just before sundown. As a result, the soggy blonde girl who walked through the Nara's door was not a happy camper.

Meanwhile, Shikamaru was stretched out comfortably on the couch, where he had been since his return around 6:00, reading the newspaper. Shikamaru turned his head as Temari stepped, dripping, through the doorway, wet hair plastered over her eyes. He raised his eyebrows in mild surprise, then smirked slightly before returning his gaze to the newspaper. Bad mistake.

Seething, Temari tapped him on the shoulder. As he turned again, and started to form the word 'What', she shook her head like a dog, spraying him with cold rain water. He yelped and rolled of the couch, onto the hard floor. Temari laughed evilly at him before heading for the stairs.

"Boy, that floor gets you every time, huh? I think it's plotting against you..."

Shikamaru grumbled angrily after her. Temari went to take a shower, making sure to carry her clean clothes with her into the bathroom. She sighed in relief as the warm water soothed her numb muscles. She hadn't realized how freaking cold she was. _Stupid Shikamaru... I owe him more than just a little cold water. _

However, Temari felt, as the heat seeped back into her body, the anger dissolved, and she got out of the shower feeling very refreshed. She put on her clothes, opened the door slowly, looked to make sure there was no one to crash into, and returned down the stairs. The smell of food greeted her, surprising her. _I thought I'd missed dinner... _

As she strolled into the kitchen, her jaw dropped at the sight before her. There was Shikamaru, with a grumpy look on his face, clad in a pink apron and yellow oven mitts. As he noticed her, he grumbled under his breath. Temari smirked at him and leaned back into the wall, crossing her arms and shaking her head slowly. Shikamaru grimaced but continued to cook.

"If you say anything. _Anything! _ I'm taking your food and giving it to the deer, and you can go without dinner. You know we had dinner almost an hour ago."

Temari's eyebrows shot up. _They already ate? And he's cooking me something? Unbelievable. _As if he could read her mind, Shikamaru stared bleakly at her before rolling his eyes.

"And no, I didn't choose to cook you anything. My mom somehow got the idea that your getting lost was my fault, so here I am," He paused and looked with disgust at the apron and oven mitts. "in these hideous clothes, being forced to cook."

Temari's eyebrows returned to their normal level. _Why did I think he would cook for me, exactly? He's not exactly a caring, thoughtful person. ...Then again, neither am I... _She smirked and pointed at him.

"You know, I think you could start a trend with that fashion statement… Mama's Boys in Oven Mitts, or maybe–"

"Do you want to eat, or not?" Temari held her tongue, too hungry to make fun of him further.

Shikamaru waved for her to sit down, and opened the oven, producing baked potatoes, some sort of pie, and a steak with mushrooms. Shikamaru cut pieces off the steak and pie, plopped a steaming potato on the plate, before tossing it onto the table and leaving without a word.

Temari stared after him, wondering if she should have thanked him. Unsure of Shikamaru's ability as a cook, Temari cautiously cut off a small piece of steak and chewed it, expecting a wave of nausea or at least to find it charred beyond all recognition. Instead, she took another bite, and another, followed by another. When at last she was finished, she stared in shock at her empty plate. _The jerk can cook..._

She was reaching for seconds when she heard footsteps approaching. Refusing to look like she'd enjoyed his food, Temari changed her course to the sink and made a retching sound. Shikamaru growled in annoyance and took her plate off the table.

"If you didn't like it, why'd you eat all of it? It even looks like you licked the plate..." Temari's face flushed and she frowned at him. _The best defense is a strong offense..._

"I was hungry... If you'd been wandering around some foreign rainy village for six hours, you'd be willing to eat crap too. Speaking of which, where the hell did you go anyways?" He looked away and fiddled with his Chuunin vest.

"Somewhere where I can hear myself think..."

Not looking back, he walked briskly out of the kitchen. _It's so nice to be staying with such a sociable person... _ Staring unhappily down at her hands, Temari began to regret her rude actions. _Why am I such a bitch to him? Not to say he doesn't deserve it... most of the time... Look at this... I have no one to talk to and it's so boring here that I end up talking to myself like a crazy hag..._

Alone in the silence, Temari's ears pricked as they picked up the barely noticeable sound of the front door closing. Her curiosity roused, Temari peeked her head around the hall corner, but saw no one. Teal eyes narrowed and Temari cautiously crept to the door. For some reason, she found herself on edge, expecting a trap. Inching the door open, the only thing that greeted her was a soft blast of cool air.

Wondering if she'd imagined the whole thing, Temari stepped outside and looked both ways. Her heart nearly stopped when she caught sight of a tall figure facing her, hands in his pockets. Heartbeat thumping in her ears, Temari felt a wave of fear threaten to drown her. She had not forgotten the creep from Suna. _It's him. He did find me. _Unwilling to let the terror overcome her that easily, Temari reached for her fan and looked more closely.

When she did, her heart slowed down, and her shoulders slumped in relief. The figure she had mistaken for her suitor was in fact someone else, walking away from her. About the only thing that she'd gotten right was that they had their hands in their pockets. Temari exhaled slowly, and blew a sweaty strand of hair out of her face. _Why am I so on edge?_

She was about to mind her own business and head back inside, when the moonlight reflected off the person walking away. He had a shock of spiky hair tied up in a topknot, closely resembling the shape of a pineapple. Temari rubbed her eyes and made sure it was him, finding her nagging curiosity back again. _Where is he going so late at night?_

Careful not to make any sound, Temari leapt into the trees and followed him slowly, making sure to keep her distance. As the figure down below her kept walking at his leisurely pace, something told her that something was not quite right with him. Even from the shadows of the branches, she could tell that he was slumped more than usual. _What's wrong with him? Surely he wasn't that hurt that I said I didn't like his food... That would be stupid... and that's one thing Shikamaru is not..._

After being followed for a while, Shikamaru came to an clearing, and Temari was forced to skirt it. The soft sound of gurgling water reached her as she came to a stop. From her perch in the trees by the river side, Temari watched as Shikamaru lay down beneath a single tree, staring up at the stars.

_This must be where he goes all the time... A little too quiet for my tastes, but... it's nice._ He lay there peacefully for a long time, hands behind his head, just listening to the river and the night sounds of Konoha. Just when Temari was convinced he'd fallen asleep like a baby, he stirred, and rose slowly, stretching his stiff limbs.

Temari rose, ready to speed back to the house so her disappearance wasn't noticed. To her surprise, Shikamaru did not start walking back across the clearing, but instead, stepped towards the water. As she watched, frozen in place, he took of his chuunin vest and black shirt, and tossed them on the grass. _What the...?_

A blush raged across her face as he did the same with his pants and socks. Even when he was obscured by darkness, she could still make out his lanky physique, and the way his muscles rippled slightly when he threw his clothes into the pile. Temari was relieved when he didn't remove his boxers as well. _I would have turned away if he did... right? _

Puzzled by his actions, Temari could not keep her eyes of off him. _What exactly is he doing? Practicing a strip routine? _Temari had to shove both hands over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. _That can't be it... I mean, no one would pay to see him of all people... _A small voice poked its head up and spoke inside her: _It looks like we might... _

Temari whacked it with her mental fan, but could not deny the truth in the sentiment. Any further thoughts were interrupted by a splash. Her head snapped towards the sound, so fast it shot pain through her neck. Rubbing her neck viciously, Temari strained her eyes trying to find Shikamaru's shape amongst the darkness. For a long while she couldn't find him, and she began to worry. _Are there mutant alligators in Konoha, or did he just decide to go home?_

Frowning, she felt annoyance rise in her. _He pisses me off soooo much! _A deep intake of breath and a series of sputtering rang throughout the clearing. There, in the middle of the freezing river, half naked, was the Chuunin she'd marked down as boring and predictable. As she lost control of her body and mind, she continued to watch as he rubbed his eyes and breathed in slowly, closing his eyes. Without thinking, Temari slowly climbed down the tree and began to get closer and closer to him.

Enthralled by something she didn't understand, she crouched behind a bush, breathing softly, trying to make herself move.It was like she was trapped in her own body, unable to do anything, almost like she was caught in Shikamaru's jutsu, but she wasn't. _What am I doing? I'm just like one of those peeping tom perverts in those stupid romance books... _

Shikamaru lay floating in the water, staring up at the sky, or whatever it was he loved so much up there. As far as Temari could tell, he was completely oblivious to everything but his own thoughts. Shifting her weight, she stepped on some dry leaves, making a quiet crunching sound. Thinking no more of it, Temari turned back to the river. Strangely enough, he was no where to be found.

"Where did he go?" Temari softly muttered to herself. Next thing she knew, something heavy had bowled into her, and she was pinned flat on her back, a piece of icy sharp metal tickling her throat. One strong arm had her shoulder pinned, while the other held a kunai against the soft skin of her neck.

Looking up at her attacker in horror, mind still a confused jumble, she felt cold water drip onto her face, arms and legs. Just like that, fear was replaced with an equal balance of embarrassment and anger. _Oh shit..._

Shikamaru had tackled her, still clad in just boxers, and, judging by the crazed look of confusion in his eyes, still had not completely recognized her. As a fiery blush crept across Temari's face, realization dawned in Shikamaru's face. Temari glared at him.

"Get...off...now."

That same annoying inner voice piped up yet again, causing a vein to pulse in her forehead. _Or don't... Either one's fine... We don't mind so much..._

Shikamaru slowly withdrew the kunai from her throat, but kept her pinned, still not quite convinced it was her. As Temari seethed in silence, angry and humiliated by her helpless situation, Shikamaru at last noticed the position they were in.

Opening and closing his mouth in confusion, dismay, and bashfulness, Shikamaru stared dumbly at Temari's red face, then his own boxers, followed by his arm across her upper chest ending in a hand on her shoulder.

He lay almost completely on top of her, torsos and lower bodies separated only by a few centimeters. Almost her entire kimono was drenched with river water, making the black material even darker. When he at last found words, they escaped his mouth squeakily.

"Ummm... sorry?"

Before he could do anything to correct the situation, Temari helped him out. As he loosened his grip slightly, she rolled farther onto her back and kicked him off with the bottoms of her feet.

His flight through the air was quite temporary, as he collided with a tree, the impact sending out a resounding thwack through the still night. Gingerly rubbing several gashes on the bare skin of his arm, Shikamaru sat up, and just looked at Temari. He threw his hands up in anger.

"I get it... It's all my fault that you were peeping on me, huh? It's _my _fault that you nearly got yourself killed sneaking around and spying on me. Thanks, I find that vicious kicks are quite soothing after cold swims. What the hell is wrong with all you women?"

Shaking his head in bitter fury and embarrassment, Shikamaru resorted to mumbling his catchphrase.

"Troublesome woman..."

As the blush subsided from her face, Temari felt herself being dragged into yet another argument. She snorted.

"Please... don't flatter yourself, I would never peep on anyone, let alone some worthless lazy-ass like you... Besides, what am I supposed to assume when you're tiptoeing around in the dead of night?"

Shikamaru just looked away and started walking back into the clearing, grumbling under his breath. Temporarily forgetting his lack of clothes, Temari's hand shot out grabbing his shoulder in a vice grip.

"Where do you think you're going? We're not finished with our little discussion." Shikamaru turned around, an expression of tired annoyance on his face. He replied with a resigned voice laced with sarcasm.

"It's kind of cold if you hadn't noticed. I'm going to go get some clothes on before I freeze to death. Then I'm going to go home and take a hot shower. Do you wanna watch that too?" Temari flushed and let go of him, turning away.

"I'd rather not..." _Yeah right..._

Shikamaru slipped his clothes back on and started making his way back to his house, not waiting for Temari. It didn't matter to her; she had no desire to spend anymore time with him. Jaw set tightly, Temari just sat there for a while, thinking about what had just happened. She could still feel the phantom pressure of his weight on top of her, and it felt... No, she was determined _not_ to go there.

Gently resting her head against a tree trunk, she looked up at the stars that Shikamaru had been intently watching a while ago. Furrowing her eyebrows, Temari let loose a torrent of questions that had been dammed up inside her head.

_How does he make me feel this way?!? I hate him with all my being, and I'm pretty sure he hates me too, but what is this? Why didn't I leave when I saw what he was doing? What the hell is WRONG with me?_

She couldn't answer any of her own questions, and the stars just winked back at her unhelpfully. Repressing the urge to break something, Temari stood up stiffly. It was a beautiful night, and the scenic clearing made for a serene, picturesque setting, but she was too pissed off and confused to notice.

As she traversed the deserted Konoha streets, her frustration mounted, doing battle with whatever it was she felt for Shikamaru. More and more, her fingers itched to either be around his neck, or caressing his chest, to be beating the crap out of him, or holding him. Disgusted by her own thoughts, she stopped and kicked a mailbox, sending it flying and eliciting a string of barks from some dog nearby.

When she arrived back at the Nara house at around 11:00, all the lights were out, and everyone was asleep. Soft snoring was coming from the living room, but Temari had no wish to confront Shikamaru. _I just need some sleep, that's all... It's just confused hormones looking for an outlet, that's all..._

Trudging up the stairs and to her bedroom, Temari didn't bother to turn on any lights. Walking through the darkness, she slipped on a sock that had somehow made its way out from underneath Shikamaru's bed. She landed hard on her back, and had to stop herself from screaming out in fury. Cursing under her breath, Temari picked up the sock and stomped over to the closet, intending to dispose of it there.

There was a creaking sound as she turned the knob, and a flood of junk crashed down on her, half burying her in dirty clothes, books, shougi sets and other crap. Respect for his parents was the only thing that kept Temari from stomping down the stairs and ripping Shikamaru limb from limb.

Exhaling slowly to calm herself, Temari picked a candy bar wrapper off her arm and sat up. _Who the hell keeps a candy bar wrapper in their closet anyways? _She was so caught up in how she was gonna kill Shikamaru as soon as they were alone that she almost missed the plain looking book lying in her lap. But she didn't.

Curious, she turned on a lamplight and flipped the book open, examining the first page. Her eyes bugged out when she saw what it was. A diary. The first date was almost three years ago. Closing the book, she grinned devilishly. _Oh, this is good... This is VERY good..._

Laughing evilly, she stuffed the book into her duffel bag that she was taking on the mission and turned off the light. Stripping off her wet kimono, Temari climbed into bed.

_Maybe it won't be such a boring mission after all... MWAHAHAHAHAHA… MWAHAHAHAHAHA! Whoa... I didn't think that I could pull off an evil laugh, especially just in my mind..._

With those last strange thoughts, Temari fell asleep.

**A/N Sorry about that last part, I have a random side of me that just needs to get out sometimes... Wow, I just realized how many water analogies I used in this chapter… my bad… But anyways… OOOH! What will happen on the mission? When will the weirdo guy come into play in the story? When will the diary actually be read? Is anyone else getting tired of these dramatic questions? Well, thanks for reading, and I'll try to get the next chapter up next Sunday. Oh and I have a poll for people. What do you call Shikamaru's hairstyle?**


	7. A Hectic Morning

**A/N: My god, you have no idea how hard this was to write... I am suffering from extreme writers block. Not that I've lost interest in the story (not at all), I just find it hard to get across exactly what I'm thinking. It's very frustrating, but I should slip out of it soon... Virtual cookies to anyone that can find the spaceballs quote (I do not own Spaceballs or anything...) Thanks to all my readers and reviewers! Enough chit chat. Here's chapter 7!**

Everyone knows the worst part of waking up is the alarms. To be shaken from some pleasant, peaceful dream by an earsplitting mechanical bleating sound; it's just not pleasant. For this reason Shikamaru did not own an alarm clock. At least that's what _he_ thought.

Face buried in his pillow, arms and legs spread in a sort of starfish form across the couch, Shikamaru was snoring softly. As he rolled over, a few words of sleep talking escaped his mouth.

"Unnngggg... timette beebar... Not the toaster!"

Unbeknownst to him, but knownst to us, Temari was standing over him, a sadistic smirk on her face, two pot lids in her hands. His gibberish was interrupted by his new alarm.

Shikamaru was yanked from sleep by the harsh sound of improvised cymbals. Yelling in incoherent terror, Shikamaru jumped up and did several laps around the living room, waving his arms around in panic. At last his groggy brain put two and two together and he lowered his arms, glowering at her.

"That was _not _a cool thing to do... and I was having some good dream... Damn, troublesome woman, now I can't remember it..." Temari fluttered her eyelashes mockingly and grinned fiendishly.

"Did it involve me?" Shikamaru rolled his eyes and snorted. _Wait, I just woke up..._ A wave of panic shot through him and his head snapped down to see what he was wearing. Luckily, since he'd been cold when he went to bed, he had slept in a shirt and sweat pants. _Thank kami for that..._

"I said_ dream_, not nightmare." Shikamaru narrowed his eyes slightly at Temari as she pouted playfully.

"Aww, you're no fun..."

_Why is she acting normal? Last thing I knew she was pissed off and embarrassed? Did she forget about last night or something? She just went from being Ultra PMS woman to being in a good mood... What happened? C_onvinced that something was going on that he didn't know about, Shikamaru continued to watch her out of the corner of his eye.

Temari surprised him further when he saw her cooking him breakfast. Nothing fancy, just eggs and sausages, but this troubled Shikamaru further. _What's she so happy about?_

"Eat up lazy, today's a big day." She cheerfully sauntered over and placed the plate carefully in front of him. Shikamaru narrowed his eyes even further.

"You didn't resort to using rat poison to get back at me, did you?" Temari just shook her head and smiled.

"Ok, I give up... What's wrong with you? Did I miss something?" Shikamaru impaled a sausage in his fork and brought it to his mouth, waiting for her answer.

"What are you talking about? _Nothing_ happened." Shikamaru, being the excellent analyst that he was, could tell she was lying. The knowing smirk, the strange glint in her eyes, the way she nearly purred the word 'nothing'... Temari interrupted his analysis while casually examining her fingernails.

"So, I don't suppose you were so lazy as to put off packing until the day of the trip, right?" Shikamaru's fork stopped in mid dive, and his head snapped up from his food, one eye brow twitching. _Ooops..._

"Because we're supposed to be at the gate in... 20 minutes." Shikamaru gave out a small strangled gulp before disappearing from the table in a flash. Temari laughed heartily, savoring the panic she'd caused.

"Lazy ass..."

Meanwhile, Shikamaru could have surprised Rock Lee with the speed he sprinted through the hallways. Snatching up a duffel bag, he grabbed onto the bannister and adjusted his course, not bothering or daring to slow down.

His glared bleakly out of his tired eyes. _What a perfect morning... Why is it that no one thinks to wake me up a little bit EARLIER when it comes to important days?_

Piling clothes into the duffel, Shikamaru's mind wandered back to the previous night. He hadn't thought about it much last night, due to the fact that he was freezing his ass off and tired as hell.

He had been surprised – in a bad way – when he'd caught Temari spying on him. He'd thought it quite ironic that the very cause of his late night swim would follow him there and pretty much wreck the only thing that kept him sane.

_Of all the people to be stuck in the same house with... Why her? Needless to say, we don't mix well. She gets to me in some way no one else can. When Ino calls me a loser, it doesn't hurt. Hell, _I_ call myself a loser all the time. But then Temari says it... and something about her just makes it sound completely different... I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T UNDERSTAND THINGS!_ _What IS IT that makes her so good at getting on my nerves?_

Finished packing his clothes, Shikamaru went looking for what very well might save his life on the trip; ear plugs. Not only did Chouji snore like a damn sawmill, but Shikamaru would rather have hot wax poured in his ears than listen to Temari and Ino have "girl talks", which he was sure they would. With a triumphant shout, he found them, and moved on to finding a sleeping bag.

_I think there's one in my– Holy... Someone had a wild night here... _Looking past his bed for the first time, Shikamaru caught sight of the place where Temari had nearly been buried alive the previous night. Stepping carefully over _101 Strategies to Beat the Best Shougi Master _and some random stack of CDs, Shikamaru poked his head into his recently emptied closet.

Smirking as he surmised what must have happened to Temari, Shikamaru fished his sleeping back out from underneath a pile of dirty clothes. _She can't say I didn't warn her... Even if she was half asleep..._

Calculating that he had all the essentials, Shikamaru grabbed everything and jogged back down the stairs, finding an impatient Temari raring to go. Tapping her foot, Temari shot him a glare and waved her head towards a clock.

"We're already two minutes late, baka." So, after saying their hasty goodbyes to Shikamaru's mother and father, they rushed off to the gates, where the caravan was most likely already waiting.

Sure enough, everyone except Naruto had already arrived, and Tsunade, who was there to see them off, shook her head in embarrassment and anger as she caught sight of Temari and Shikamaru.

Most of the caravan workers were busy loading the last of their valuable cargo onto the carts. Shikamaru took note that most of them were soft peasants who looked like they'd never seen so many weapons, let alone used them. _Well that could be troublesome..._

Tsunade was standing beside a lone man, presumably the merchant. He was a bear of a man, with a rotund body and a fat face crowned with spiky freakishly dyed green hair. His cheeks were rosy and he had a number of smile lines, visible because of the huge grin that lit up his face. The man swayed slightly in place, giving Shikamaru the feeling that he was quite drunk. Shikamaru did not like his looks in the slightest, but who was he to choose his employers?

The man was surveying the ninja that had already arrived, no doubt happy to see so many assigned to his caravan. Tsunade turned to him and offered a slight bow of embarrassment.

"I am sorry Hebezuma-san, we are still waiting on one ninja. Thank you for your patience." Hebezuma chuckled loudly and clapped her on the back like she was an old drinking buddy. _Ha, for all I know, they are old drinking buddies... _

"That's all right Tsunade-sama, I don't mind waiting a little bit longer." A little ways behind him, one of the workers dropped a crate, and weapons spilled everywhere. Hebezuma's face flushed and he began yelling.

"OY! Dunderhead! What's the matter with you?!? Be careful with the merchandise." Turning back to Tsunade, the anger faded as quickly as it had arrived, and he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Well... so much for the beads and cloth cover story... I wouldn't be surprised if half of Konoha saw that..."

Tsunade nodded, and spoke directly to Shikamaru.

"Well, look who showed up. Was this not important enough for you to get here on time?" Shikamaru guiltily looked at his feet, unsure of what to say. Smirking, Temari answered for him.

"Lazy ass here didn't even pack until this morning..." Shikamaru looked at Temari in horror.

"You're not _helping, _Temari..." He hissed, aware that all his friends' eyes were on him. The corners of her mouth barely twitched, but he could see a full blown smirk in her teal eyes. Tsunade exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I suspected as much... Well, Shikamaru, I was thinking about giving you command of the mission, but I have reconsidered. Neji?" The Hyuuga stepped forward and bowed dutifully.

"Yes, Hokage-sama?"

"You're in charge of the mission. I want you and your team will make up the vanguard. Team 8 will patrol the left side, Team Gai the right." Smirking Tsunade addressed Shikamaru.

"Shikamaru, you and your team will have the rearguard."

Shikamaru groaned as Chouji and Ino joined them, while Temari just laughed. After greeting his friends, Shikamaru glared sideways at Temari. Waving his arms hysterically, he yelled at her.

"You just had to open your mouth, didn't you? Well, maybe you'll learn your lesson about shutting up once and a while." Temari looked puzzled and angry at the same time, but mostly puzzled.

"What are you talking about? What's so bad about the rearguard?" Shikamaru just sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Oh, believe me, you'll see soon enough..."

As the pair continued to bicker, Chouji turned aside to Ino, grinning.

"I've got a feeling this is going to be an entertaining mission..."

As they had just been about to depart without him, Naruto had finally shown up, slung over Iruka's shoulder. Shikamaru's initial worry for his friend was replaced by annoyance. Apparently, Iruka had taken the genin out for all-you-can-eat ramen to celebrate Naruto's upcoming "super-action packed mission." Naruto, judgment clouded by the excitement, had promptly eaten himself into a coma like state. _That's Naruto for you... Of course you don't see his team detailed to rear guard..._

Now, a good seven hours later, the caravan had departed and was on its way to the Land of Lightning. Shikamaru walked alongside his friends and Temari, feet sloshing in the mud and filth created by the caravan. Chouji didn't seem to mind much, and Temari was too tough to admit any discomfort, but Ino kept squealing in disgust whenever she stepped in a particularly large pile of gunk.

Ino let out another shriek, causing Shikamaru and the other two to cover their ears and wince. _Ugh, I never realized how shrill her voice is..._ Hearing a scuffle, Shikamaru turned around to see Temari holding Ino by the shirt collar, threatening her with an upraised fist. Shikamaru began to wish he had kept his ear plugs in his pocket, rather than in his bag.

Trying to calculate how long it would take them to get to Kumo and back, Shikamaru stepped in a pile of mud that made a slightly different sound. Looking down slowly, he realized it was not mud that he had stepped in. _I... officially... hate... this... mission... _

Kicking the bits of turd off his foot and muttering obscenities to himself, Shikamaru glared at the oxen in front of him. It craned its neck to meet his gaze and stared back placidly, chewing its cud, swatting at flies with it's tail.

If oxen could smirk, Shikamaru swore this one did. Narrowing his eyes at it, Shikamaru mouthed one word; 'beef' The oxen mooed disapprovingly, before losing interest and turning its head away. _Great, now I'm arguing with animals... I am slowly but surely losing my mind..._

Temari came up beside him, carefully stepping over the pile of crap he'd stepped in. Frowning, she smacked him upside the head, but continued to walk beside him.

"Now I see what you meant about the rearguard thing. Why do you always put things off?" Shikamaru, wincing and rubbing his head, closed one eye and looked sideways at her.

"Sometimes I wonder myself... I don't know, I guess it's just in my blood. ...Why are you so violent all the time?" Temari shrugged and laughed causing Shikamaru to cock an eyebrow in puzzlement. _Women... Always unpredictable..._

"Did I miss something? What's so funny?"

Temari stopped laughing and looked at him with those beautiful eyes. _Wait... did I just think that her eyes are beautiful? ...Maybe I did... Doesn't mean anything..._

"Nothing, I just think this is the most talkative you've been this trip, without yelling or something. Not including your _wonderful _tour, that is." Shikamaru sensed only playful sarcasm and had to hold back a smile.

"Am I really _that _boring? I mean come on, in the two days you've been here, I've been a tour guide, a gourmet chef, and a sherpa..." Temari laughed again and added to his list in a low voice.

"Not to mention a male stripper..." Shikamaru rolled his eyes, but could not summon any anger.

"I'll give you a free pass on that one because you shut Ino up..." Temari smirked and they both looked over their shoulders to see Ino staring wide-eyed at Temari, Chouji close beside her, a protective arm around her shoulder. Temari elbowed Shikamaru lightly and pointed to Chouji's arm, grinning. _Good for you,Chouji..._

Temari yawned and looked up at the setting sun. She nodded her head towards the front of the caravan.

"I'm tired of slogging through mud and cow turds. I'm gonna go see how much longer we have until we stop." Shikamaru lazily swatted away a fly and shrugged.

"Good luck. I just got yelled at for asking the drunk green-haired guy." Temari gave him a 'just watch and learn face' before continuing on. As she walked away, Shikamaru found his gaze wander to her ample hips and butt swaying slightly with each step. It had a hypnotizing effect, much like that of a pendulum. Blushing furiously, he was reminded of one of Naruto's perverted one liners. _'I hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave baby...' For the love of... How does she do this to me?_

Shikamaru just walked along in his trance as Temari got farther and farther away. Losing track of time, he just stared up at the orange sky and clouds, mechanically trudging on behind the caravan. After who knows how long, he was revived by a hand being waved in front of his face.

Temari stood in front of him, smirking at his blank expression. He just blinked a couple of times as his body slowly changed from auto pilot back to manual. She beckoned around her and grinned. Tents were being set up, the carts had been unhitched, and the other ninja were drawing lots for when they'd be on watch duty.

"How long was I sleep walking?" Temari tapped a finger against her chin.

"Meh, about half an hour. It's about six in the evening now. Chouji and Ino are finding us something to eat, too." Shikamaru's jaw dropped as Temari lowered the tent sack she was holding to the ground.

"But... Hebezuma-sama told me we would be stopping around eight, at the earliest... how...?" Temari looked up and smiled devilishly.

"Being Gaara's sister has it's advantages. We Sabakuss are pretty good with persuasion... Now help me with this tent, lazy ass, or you're sleeping on the ground."

Shikamaru quickly obliged, anxious not to spoil Temari's good mood. As they pitched the tent, he stole furtive glances at the sand nin, enthralled by her powerful aura of self-confidence. _I've got to hand it to her... She may be troublesome, but she's quite a woman..._

**A/N Sorry if this chapter sucks and that it is short... I had a long week and had trouble finding time to work on this, but I wanted to get an update up for all you guys. Sorry if there are more spelling/grammatical errors in this chapter, cuz I didn't have that much time to proofread it... Oh and FYI, Hebezuma is a combination of the japanese words for 'Drunken' and 'Porcupine' Thanks for reading, and I'll try to make next week's installment longer/better. Also, do you think I should do away with all these Author's notes, or do you enjoy hearing me ramble?**


	8. Attack of the Goons Imoutofchapternames

**A/N: Wow, sorry to all the people who have been reading this. This update took me a LONG time!!! I have been very busy lately, but that's no excuse. Thanks to any of you that have hung in there and are going to keep reading. Also, more bad news is that a Greek reader reviewed to tell me that I have the title completely wrong . Anaisthitos means someone without feelings or who is unconscious. Thanks to I-don't-have-a-name for pointing this out, and I guess I will be changing the title. Any suggestions are very VERY welcome (I hate coming up with titles)! Also, any reviews telling me what a dumbass I am will be accepted without complaint... Anyways, here's chapter 8. **

Temari rolled over in her sleeping bag, covering her ears with her pillow and nearly yelling aloud with frustration. To her left, Ino was spread out in her king-sized sleeping bag, taking up more than a third of the tent and sleeping like a baby.

This forced her to move closer to the person next to her. She would have taken at least some pleasure from annoying Shikamaru, and keeping him awake with some 'accidental kicking', except for one thing: Shikamaru wasn't next to her. Instead, the source of her annoyance and rising anger, Chouji, was there.

During the waking hours, Chouji seemed nice enough, and, as far as Konoha ninja went, Temari did not mind his company so much. But at _night_, now there was the problem. The loud, sickeningly wet snoring that originated from next to her, driving off any hint of sleep. _Not to say I'm not tired... It's just hard to fall asleep when you have the human garbage disposal turned on next to you..._

Her thoughts were interrupted _again_, by Mr. Woodchipper. This time, Temari had to bite her tongue to keep from reaching for her fan and braining the chubby ninja next to her.

Clenching and unclenching her fists like a cat sheathing and unsheathing its claws, Temari stared up through the tent 'skylight' out into the black night, trying another tactic to help herself get to sleep. Rambling to herself.

_Ok... So... At this rate, we probably won't get to Kumo for about three days. A day more through forest, a two days after that over mountains and tundras. Still, a trip to the famous Lightning hot springs should be a nice– OH FOR THE LOVE OF– SHUT UP, CHOUJI! SHUT UP! A girl just needs a certain amount of sleep, and when she doesn't get that certain amount... Well, things tend to get a bit unpleasant..._

Temari bit down on her hand to control herself, and inhaled and exhaled slowly, calming herself down. _Maybe I should join Shikamaru... _

Shikamaru had been kept awake too, finding his earplugs obsolete when it came to Chouji's earthshaking snoring. Muttering something about 'being able to actually feel Chouji's snoring in the ground', Shikamaru had gotten up, and kicking his friend lightly, had exited the tent.

Sick of her futile attempts at rest, Temari sighed loudly and wiggled her way out of the sleeping bag. Since she was sleeping right next to two guys, Temari had insisted on keeping her black kimono on, yet she was still met by a whoosh of freezing air as she left the safe warmth of her bedding.

Holding herself and trying to keep her teeth from chattering, Temari told herself to toughen up and stepped out of the confines of the tent.

Almost immediately, she got used to the cold, trained as she was from living in a desert climate, and felt strangely at home. She had always taken an odd kind of pleasure in the way Suna had been burning hot during the daytime and freezing at night. _It always feels like having a cold water to douse yourself in after being set on fire. Well that doesn't sound pleasant, but it is... _

After relishing the temperature, Temari remembered the reason she'd left the tent. Thanks to the swollen moon and its light, along with torches that burned at various intervals throughout the camp, she didn't have to strain her eyes to find him. Shikamaru half-sat half-lay against a pine-tree trunk, pineapple hair accenting the profile created by moonlight.

Smiling slightly for some unknown reason, Temari unconsciously put her hands on her hips, examining the leaf chuunin. _He looks exactly like he did last night... _

A wicked idea crept into her head and she grinned evilly to herself. Pretty sure he was asleep, or at least in a deep enough trance that he hadn't noticed her, Temari tiptoed towards him, each footfall softer than the last. When at last she stood over him, she felt a mote of guilt for disturbing him. Never before had she seen more peaceful human being, and the subtle rise and fall of his chest nearly convinced her to leave him alone.

But then again, this is Temari we're talking about. Shrugging off the moment of indecision, Temari reached forward with one hand, intending to shake him violently from his state of bliss. To her surprise, without opening his eyes, Shikamaru caught her wrist.

Holding it in a strong but gentle grip that made her uncomfortable, Shikamaru stifled a yawn with his free hand and opened one eye slightly.

"Were you going to yell 'OOGBOOGA' too?"

Temari nodded mutely, nearly frozen by the feeling of his skin on hers. _Oh grow up... It's not like he's holding your hand or anything... _

Shikamaru sighed and slumped back against the tree trunk, but Temari thought she saw a flicker of a smile before he turned away. Feeling childish, Temari turned to walk away, but found herself still in Shikamaru's grasp. _Awkward._

"Um... You know you're still holding me right?"

Shikamaru nodded wordlessly, causing an inexplicable feeling of sick warmth flow through Temari's stomach and chest.

"Yeah. I was just considering if asking you to stay would be worth it..."

As if anticipating her shock, he let go and looked up at her, trademark bored expression present on his face. _Did he just willingly ask to spend time with me? _Seeing the confused look on her face, he gave her a small sideways smirk.

"Don't get all emotional. You might ruin the serenity, but I want to talk to someone, so I guess you'll just have to do."

Temari studied his convincing poker face, unable to find any features that betrayed what he might be really thinking. A slow smirk spread across her face.

"What happened to you always wanting to be alone? And why aren't you trying to get some sleep?"

Shikamaru shrugged and stuck both hands behind his head, closing his eyes once again.

"Relax, it's not like we're going to talk about our non-existant undying love. As for sleeping, I can still hear my friend the lawn mower from here, so that's kind of out of the question. But hey, if you don't want to stay, I'm not one to stop you from leaving..."

Temari hesitated a moment, before lowering herself to the ground and leaning against the same tree as Shikamaru. Dry pine needles scratched against the back of her legs, but she didn't mind. Groaning and she settled back into the sturdy wood, Temari cracked a smile.

"You can't get rid of me that easily, lazy."

Shikamaru only gave a distracted grunt in reply. After a few moments he spoke.

"What do you think of Hebezuma-sama?" Temari frowned for a moment, considering the question.

"I don't like him, that's simple enough... He seems sleazy, self-important, and two-faced. You saw how polite and civil he was to the Hokage, but when that worker dropped the crate, I thought for a moment he was going to beat the poor guy. But if you're looking for a possible traitor, I don't think it's him. He's too much of a vain moron, if you ask me."

Shikamaru nodded slowly in approval, but continued to frown out into space.

"I agree, I don't think he's the traitor. But, he wouldn't be too hard for the traitor to manipulate."

"And what makes you so certain that there even is a traitor?" Shikamaru continued to stare into nothingness, now with his fingers bridged in meditative thought.

"Think about it. Konoha has never been the most popular of nations, and since we're now allied with Suna, any number of other nations are just itching for a chance to set us back somehow, to keep our power in check."

"You think that this is the opportunity that they're looking for? A chance to start a war between Konoha and Kumo?"

Shikamaru nodded, still the picture of peace and composure. Suddenly he smiled and looked sideways at her.

"You know, I asked Ino the same question about Hebezuma..."

"And?"

"All she had to say was that he was a smelly drunk who had the fashion sense of a dead alleycat."

Temari giggled slightly, imagining Ino with a hand on her hip, snapping her fingers in front of her face while saying that.

"You've got to stop giggling. You're going to give me a heart attack..."

She glared and began pounding her fist into his arm, resulting in a struggle as Shikamaru tried to get a grip on her arms and Temari tried to hit any punches home she could. Neither considered it romantic in the least, but the average passerby might think differently.

Both stopped and looked up, wide eyed, at the sound of a throat clearing. _Please don't let it be Naruto... _

Temari was relieved (slightly) and kind of creeped out to see one of the older caravan laborers standing about ten yards away from them, arms crossed, a stupid, toothless grin plastered on his face. She recognized him as the worker that had dropped the crate of weapons back in Konoha. Temari looked down at Shikamaru, where she had pinned him against the tree and ground. He was giving her a very calm 'you've done it now' look, but she thought she caught just the smallest hint of a sweat forming across his forehead.

Remembering the old man, she hastily got off of Shikamaru, and turned to frown at the man, hoping he'd go away. If at all possible, the man's grin widened, and he shook his head chuckling to himself.

"Ah... young love... Well, if I didn't have to piss like a camel, I'd stick around to give ya some pointers." He stopped, and winked at Shikamaru. "Just remember fella, always play it safe!"

With that, the odd geezer walked off into the bushes, leaving Shikamaru and Temari to stare after him in a mixture of shock and disgust. In unison they turned towards each other and blinked a few times.

"Was he talking about a con–"

"Yes, just DON'T say it... troublesome old man..."

Both looked at each other again in hot embarassment and burst into bouts of nervous laughter.

"Well, who knows where he got that idea, eh?"

Shikamaru scratched the back of his head, looking up at the sky, and Temari examined a particularly interesting pinecone. An uncomfortable silence ensued, leaving the crickets and the man pissing in the bushes (apparently he really had to go like a racehorse) as the only ones making noise.

After a few minutes that seemed like an eternity, the sand nin did her best to break the ice.

"So... how are we going to survive this mission if we can't sleep? Know any jutsus that can turn a person temporarily mute?" She waited for an answer, but didn't receive one. Puzzled, Temari turned to look at Shikamaru.

He was lazily watching bats flutter around, but Temari could tell that he was focusing on something else. Not known for her patience, Temari soon grew frustrated by his silence. _One minute we're talking and he's being open, the next he withdraws into his little shell of isolation. Pfff... men. _At last, she rose slowly and kicked him lightly in the arm. Still no response.

"Fine, if you're just going to lie there like you're comatose, then I'm–"

Moving faster than she'd seen him move before, Shikamaru got up and clapped a hand over her mouth, dragging her behind the tree. Just as she was preparing to yell bloody murder and beat the shit out of him, Temari noticed the way his eyes had sharpened, and that he seemed to be straining to hear something in the silence. _Something's wrong..._

"What's going on?" She whispered, careful to keep her voice as low as possible. Shikamaru turned to her, and pointed towards their tent.

"Someone's out there, and I don't think it's that perverted old guy. Get your fan and wake Ino and Chouji. Keep them quiet and try to wake up everyone else without being detected. If worst comes to worst and whoever they are start to attack, tell Ino to shriek away. We'll need some sort of alarm."

Temari, all business, nodded and went about her task, not bothering to ask what he was going to do. _He can handle himself. He may be a lazyass, but he becomes pretty damn reliable in situations like these. _

Standing up straight, Temari casually strolled over to the tent, careful to keep a cool demeanor in spite of the quickening _thump thump _of her heart. Unzipping the flap and climbing inside, Temari shook Chouji and Ino, making sure to keep a hand clamped over Ino's mouth.

Temari was pleasantly surprised that they both caught on quickly and nodded their consent when she told them to _quietly_ wake the others. As Chouji and Ino exited through the rear tent flap, keeping low to the ground, Temari returned to Shikamaru's position.

He was still crouched behind the tree, surveying the shrubbery that surrounded their campsite. At the sound of Temari approaching him, he rotated his head slightly towards her and raised his eyebrows in query.

"What? Surely you didn't think I'd let you have all the fun? You know, I have a knack for saving your ass after all..." Shikamaru rolled his eyes and grunted.

"Tch, whatever..." Temari peeked over his shoulder into the surrounding darkness.

"So, what have you got so far, Shikamaru?" Turning his attention back to the foliage, Shikamaru furrowed his eyebrows.

"I can't tell how many, but there are definitely people out there. They've been holding their position for some reason. Probably waiting for orders. One thing bothers me though. The old guy never came back..." Temari shrugged.

"Well they are ninja. Killing quietly is in the job description, provided you're not of the Uzumaki clan. Or..." Shikamaru nodded his head, willing her to continue the thought.

"Or he's the inside man... We'll find out soon enough, I suppose." Their concentration was broken as a loud shout rang through the encampment.

"Aya! INO WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN OUR TENT?!?"

Shikamaru covered his eyes in annoyed resignation, while Temari couldn't help but laugh. Laughter trailing off into a groan, she joined Shikamaru in hitting their heads repeatedly against the tree.

"That's Naruto for you..."

Both waited expectantly for any sign of movement from the enemy. Temari felt Shikamaru tense next to her as a figure stepped out of the bushes, whistling carelessly. Tottering out into the firelight, the toothless old man looked around and gave them another stupid grin as he caught sight of them.

"Eh? Still at it kiddos? ...So sorry we have to interrupt!"

With that, the man's flesh dissolved, and he steadily grew in height and weight. When the dust finished settling, a hulking man in a black outfit without a headband on stood before them, his arm outstretched towards the camp. Despite the fact that he didn't look to be much older than 25, his hair was iron colored, like that of a middleaged man.

His skin had a strange grayish aura, but Temari could not quite put her finger on what it reminded her of. Startling reddish-orange eyes completed his odd appearance. All at once, shouts and war-bellows echoed out from around the encampment, mingling with the startled cries of those who hadn't already been awakened. Torches were thrown on various tents, creating an inferno that lit up the night.

Seven ninja stepped up beside their leader, who was smirking confidently at Shikamaru and Temari. He yawned and made a dismissive motion towards the sand and leaf nins. The voice he spoke in was deep and arrogant, a strange contrast to the nasal, weasly voice of the old man he had impersonated.

"Take care of the darling lovebirds; I have a hedgehog to roast." At that command, he stalked off into the chaos of battle. There was some guffawing amongst the enemy ninja as they began slowly advancing.

"Oooh! Look, Kenjii, what a curvy girl... Too bad she's a kunoichi, otherwise we wouldn't have to mess her up..."

Temari's eyes flashed, but she just grinned back at them, before looking at Shikamaru, who was half hidden in the shadows of the pine. She spoke in a confident voice.

"I guess this is where the fun starts..."

Her eyes widened as she saw that he had already formed several handsigns. Finishing the last one, he gave her a bored smile. "I wouldn't call it fun, but whatever you wanna call it, it already has..." Temari pouted playfully, while the assailants looked on in puzzlement.

"You could have left something for me to do..."

Several of the enemy ninja gasped in surprise as they found themselves unable to move. Shikamaru looked down at his feet, allowing them to do the same. Barely visible in the dim firelight, a large shadow branched out into seven smaller ones, each ending at the feet of one of the ninja.

The lazy chuunin turned to Temari and shrugged, almost causing her to laugh as his seven puppets performed the same motion in unison.

"Sheesh, fine. They're all yours." All of the ninja groaned, and Temari was pretty sure that one even soiled himself as she bared her teeth in a crazed smile at them. Unslinging and spreading her fan, Temari gave Shikamaru the signal. As he released his jutsu, Temari swung her fan, sending a gust of wind laced with chakra at the foreign ninja.

There were various screams as seven bodies smacked into trees, breaking enough bones to keep them out of the fight. Temari grinned wildly, eyes closed, at Shikamaru, whose eyebrows were raised.

"That was satisfying." Shikamaru eyed her warily, leaning back against the tree, hands in his pockets.

"I'll bet it was... Kami, remind me never to call you anything like that..." Temari took a hold of his sleeve and began dragging him back into the battle.

"Come on lazy, with your IQ of over 200 or whatever, I'm sure you've noticed people are still fighting." Shikamaru sighed but decided against complaining.

With no further hesitation, they both began running into the fray, trying to find where they were most needed. All around them, the Konoha twelve were handling themselves pretty well, despite being outnumbered at least five to one. Neji and Tenten stood back to back, fighting off a group of six ninja, while their teammate, Lee wailed on two others, literally pounding them into the ground.

Neji turned his head as a gust of wind propelled two of his enemies into a fire and another was strangled by a 2D black hand. Nodding his thanks and smiling grimly, Neji broke a man's jaw and continued to punch and block even as he greeted Temari and Shikamaru, his Byakugan allowing him to do so.

"We can handle ourselves here. Everyone seems to be holding up well, from what I can see. Even Team 8, and they weren't awake when the battle began."

Shikamaru nodded complacently, while Temari decked a ninja who had been trying to sneak up on them. Before the man could crumple completely to the ground, she sent him flying off into the night sky with her fan.

"To tell the truth, these are pretty crappy ninja..."

Tenten shrugged her shoulders and nodded, while Rock Lee reduced one of the inept attackers to tears with his lotus technique. Temari gestured over her shoulder.

"We're going to go look for the leader." Shikamaru turned to her in surprise.

"Uhh... We are?" Temari shoved him in the direction she'd seen the large enemy ninja go and he reluctantly walked on.

"Yes, now shut up."

Her ears pricked when she heard a crackling, popping sound on her right. _What's that?_ Swiftly but casually, Shikamaru siezed her shoulders and spinning, maneuvered her away from the small explosion of something in a nearby tent. Dirt clods rained down in her hair, but otherwise Temari was fine.

For some reason, instead of feeling relief at the narrowly avoided danger, she had to contain herself from laughing out loud. _He looks like he's attempting some sort of weird dance... Pfff, this is probably the closest I'll ever see him come to dancing_

Noticing Shikamaru's hands still on her shoulders, she couldn't resist a stupid joke. Smirking, she placed her hands on his hips, enjoying the way his body stiffened at her touch. Quirking an eyebrow, she spoke in a ridiculous Hispanic accent.

"Tango, ramba, or foxtrot?" Shikamaru scowled but did not move.

"Cheh, you're _welcome... _troublesome woman"

Who knows how long they might have stayed there staring at each other, both unwilling to back down, if Kiba hadn't come running along, waving his arms around wildly, trying to put out the blazing mess that was his hair. Akamaru trailed behind him, yapping at his master repeatedly. Kiba caught sight of them, and, pointing a finger, bellowed in a cracking, exasperated voice.

"Now is NOT the time for DANCING!" Before either of them had a chance to reply, Kiba ran off howling, Akamaru at his heels.

At last, they stepped away from each other, both trying to decide whether to laugh at Kiba or be afraid for him. Shikamaru was about to say something clever when a crashing sound attracted their attention. To their right, in the collapsed ruins that had been Hebezuma-sama's tent, the hulking mammoth they were looking for stood, holding the fat man by his throat. Two ninja that looked exactly the same stood on either side of him, surveying the battlefield in calm contrast to their 'passionate' leader. While the leader was tall and bulky, his two accomplices were short and wiry, and had completely average faces, devoid of scars, facial hair, or any markings of the sort.

Despite her dislike for the caravan leader, even Temari felt a pang of sympathy at the way his eyes bugged out and his head slowly turned purple. The raider continued to squeeze, grinning in sadistic pleasure at the sputtering sounds his quarry made. Shikamaru stepped up and began quietly forming handsigns, while Temari got ready to summon Kamatari. The leaf chuunin beside her finished his jutsu and a shadow began to creep across the ground. Temari grimaced and rolled her eyes. _Is he really going to take away the only challenge of the night with a cheap cloak and dagger maneuver? _Glaring, she turned to him and hissed quietly.

"That's cheating..."

Shikamaru was about to say something in response when his eyes widened and shoved Temari sideways before executing a clumsy roll in the same direction. Several kunai whizzed past the spot where their heads had been moments before, and Shikamaru's shadow shrunk to its normal size as a result of the distraction.

In the smoldering wreck of Hebezuma's tent, the twin ninjas had now turned to face them, the same look of calm coolness on both of their faces. They spoke in unison, curt voices tearing their leader away from his little world of sickening pleasure.

"Kaizuketsu, sir. Ahem."

The large man looked down at his two accomplices with a malicious expression, and Temari thought for a moment that he might actually strike the two smaller ninja. Then he followed their outstretched fingers and a grin lit up his face. Kaizuketsu let his head back and great bellowing laughter. His two minions exchanged shrugs before turning back to their leader. Done laughing, the lines of mirth faded from his face and he fixed his fiery eyes on Shikamaru and Temari.

"Doves would do better not to fuck with hawks. When they do, they have a tendency to have their wings torn off. Sono, Kono, deal with the girl, I'll take the boy. Make it quick, we have to steal the cargo and get out of Dodge fast. Ready to have your wings clipped lovebirds?

Temari defiantly glared at him. _I wish he'd stop making those damn bird punns. It's really getting on my nerves... _Beside her, Shikamaru was gazing up at the sky. Sighing he returned his eyes to the battlefield and gave her a slight frown.

"I blame this on you."

**A/N: Wow, this took FOREVER to post! I'm sorry, but I originally had intended to release 2 chapters at the same time, so as not to leave you people with a cliffhanger. Sadly, the second chapter is far from being done, so I just decided "Screw it" and uploaded this one. The next update will definitely be faster than this one, but I don't know how long it will take me. SORRY!!! Also, I'm pretty sure that none of the dances I mentioned have hands on the hips and shoulders, but sometimes you just have to cut me a little slack and give me credit for trying (I know absolutely nada about dancing.) The action sequences didn't turn out exactly how I intended, but I hope you liked them nonetheless. REVIEW!**


	9. Pins and Needles

**A/N: Well, I was hoping to update faster, but three weeks is better than five, so... Well here we are, will these three ninja prove to be stronger than their rent-a-ninja compatriots? We'll find out... (Of course, I already know )**

Looking up, Shikamaru thought of what might have happened had he just shut up about the whole ambush idea and gone back to bed. Chouji's snoring was bad... but this was worse. Across from them were three ninja he knew absolutely nothing about, and one sputtering caravan driver, who would, no doubt, _find some way to blame this on us._

He took a brief moment to sigh as he was faced with the prospect of another fight. In contrast to his own feelings of resigned irritation,he could sense the sand witch-thing was itching to beat someone to a pulp, aggression and energy radiating off her like heat waves. _Pfff... Women._

Raising his eyes, he frowned at Temari.

"I blame this on you."

Temari just smiled her toothy, fierce grin before returning her attention to the three ninja in front of them. Shikamaru shook his head and rose slowly, stretching the limbs that had already become numb after a few minutes of crouching. _I swear... I'll never understand her..._

Just then he remembered his opponent and snapped his head towards Kaizuketsu, in time to see the burly man throw several senbon his way. Throwing his head and arms backwards, Shikamaru formed an upside 'U'. Three senbon left slight tears in the front of his black outfit, but none pierced the skin.

As one whizzed past his ear, Shikamaru thought he saw a greenish tint to the point, and made a mental note. _Note to self: Don't be an idiot in the middle of a battle... _Taking a quick peek to his left, Shikamaru saw Temari dealing with the two identical ninja, keeping them at distance with various wind techniques.

Rubbing his smarting back, Shikamaru stood back up, sizing up his opponent. _I'm getting too old for this... _The man called Kaizuketsu grinned at him, showing two neat rows of pointed teeth.

"Let's get straight down to business. I'm all out of clever catch phrases..." Temari stopped what she was doing for just long enough to yell a "Thank Kami!", but Kaizuketsu brushed her off with an annoyed waving gesture and a glare. Seeing his opportunity in his opponent's distraction, Shikamaru tossed an exploding tag and dissappeared in a puff of smoke, concealing his chakra.

Reappearing in the branches of a tree behind Kaizuketsu, Shikamaru began to form hand signals. When he finished, a long shadowy figure stretched across the ground towards his opponent, twisting and churning across the ground like a serpent.

Kaizuketsu meanwhile, had his head bowed, and seemed to be contemplating what to do next. Shikamaru let out a cry of triumph as his shadow jutsu caught hold of his opponent, a ghostly black hand wrapping around the raider's ankle. The man stiffened and then froze, as Shikamaru's technique took hold of him. Jumping down from the tree, Shikamaru smiled a smug smirk.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, something clicked, and the leaf nins eyebrows furrowed in slight puzzlement. Something seemed wrong, but he couldn't quite place it. His eyes widened as realization dawned on him at about the same time a metal fist came crashing into his back, sending him sprawling. As Shikamaru sailed through the air like a rag doll, the figure which he had assumed was Kaizuketsu vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving a small, metal ball behind. _His clone didn't move when_ _I had it in the shadow possession jutsu... I've got to start paying more attention... What kind of a clone was that anyways?_

Landing hard on his face, Shikamaru rolled over gingerly, before spitting out a wad of blood and saliva. After a quick check, he realized with relief that the blood he tasted was from where he'd bitten his tongue, and was not internal bleeding. If not for the rich earth that had cushioned his fall, he might not have been able to get back up, but he managed, if a bit slowly and painstakingly.

Unfocused eyes made out the blurred shape of his opponenent, as Shikamaru winced and fell to one knee, before wiping the crimson from the corners of his mouth and rising again. Kaizuketsu's expression transformed from grim to mirthful as he grinned from ear to ear. Shaggy metallic hair fell over his face. Even still, his orange eyes blazed through the shadow, like hot coals at midnight, transfixing Shikamaru and rooting him to the spot where he half-stood, half-crouched.

Shikamaru's eyes widened as light reflected off of thousands of tiny specks, floating around him. Before he could react, Kaizuketsu performed a series of handsigns, and the specks of reflected light began to swirl into one big eddy, blinding the leaf chuunin with light. Through the flash of white, Shikamaru heard a metallic ringing and several heavy thumps. As the dots and stars faded from his vision, a network of iron bars had risen up all around him, bending into a shape similar to a birdcage.

Mouth agape, Shikamaru backed up instinctually, but was only able to take two and a half steps before his back met the cold bars. _Okay Shikamaru, you've gotten out of worse situations than this. First rule to fighting is never letting the enemy know they've got you scared shitless... even when you are..._

Shikamaru took a breath before donning his bored face and throwing up his hands in feigned indifference. Leaning back against the bars, he did his best to look casual. Cocking his head to the side and looking lazily at his enemy, Shikamaru tried to quell the panic rising up inside of him.

"So... I guess now's the time for another of your stupid bird punns, eh?" For a minute Kaizuketsu's eyes flashed, but whatever had been in his eyes for a moment was gone soon thereafter.

"Shut up. All you leaf nins are made from the same cookie cutter. Arrogant bastards with inflated egos and big mouths. Well why don't you put your money where your mouth is? You can't do anything, can you? What's it like to be helpless?"

Kaizuketsu's voice went from subdued to furious, rising from a nearly unintelligible whisper to a yell. Taken aback, Shikamaru could only wonder _What's this guy's problem?_

Fingers contorting in silent, unexplainable rage, Kaizuketsu bowed his head and took a few breaths, before sending Shikamaru an evil smirk.

"Let's take a quick timeout to check in on our companions' battle, eh?!" Forgetting about his own precarious situation for a moment, Shikamaru's neck snapped to his left. Temari moved gracefully as she avoided each of her two opponents' attacks, especially for someone lugging around a fan the size of a bureau.

In spite of himself, Shikamaru felt a pang of shame and jealousy. _She's never going to let me hear the end of this... "What, you couldn't even handle one guy, AND I had to save your ass AGAIN? Poor little Shikamaru." Ugh. _

Shikamaru blushed inexplicably as she sent one of the two men flying with a burst of wind._ Still, I suppose she does handle herself with a strange kind of... grace. I'd hate to be that guy. _Feeling a bit cheered up at the sight of Temari owning, Shikamaru shot his own smug grin back at the now red-faced Kaizuketsu. Mumbling under his breath, the metal ninja shook his fist at his subordinates, before barking an order.

"Sono, Kono, quit messing around!" The two heads turned in unison, and dipped slightly in obedience. Temari brought her fan up as a shield, waiting for whatever was about to come. Clasping hands, Sono and Kono bit down on each other's free hands, letting loose a steady trickle of blood. Dabbing their fingers into the crimson, they began to paint symbols on their arms, everyonce and a while licking their fingers.

Shikamaru gripped the bars of his prison and yelled out to Temari, who was staring in a mix of disgust and awe at the scene in front of her.

"EARTH TO TEMARI! I have no idea what the hell they're doing, but it would most likely be a good idea to stop them before they finish, don't you think?" Shaking her head to clear away the cob webs, Temari flipped him the bird, but took his advice nonetheless. Biting her thumb and quickly spreading the blood across her fan in a zig zag shape, Suna's ambassador pivoted on her feet and swung her fan around. Even from his cage thirty feet to the right, Shikamaru was nearly swept of his feet.

Wind howled as Kamatari, perched upon his scythe appeared and sailed towards Sono and Kono. It was like wave of thousands of tiny invisible knives were sweeping through the forest, creating chinks in the bars and even a few light cuts on Shikamaru. Both Shikamaru and Kaizuketsu shielded their faces as dust was kicked up by the pound. As the dust settled, Shikamaru smiled slightly and addressed Kaizuketsu.

"You underestimate the power of PMS. You know–" He stopped short as Kaizuketsu began to laugh hysterically, and followed the iron ninja's gaze to the spot where the eviscerated corpses of Sono and Kono should have been. Sono and Kono were there, they just weren't in quite as many pieces as Shikamaru would have hoped.

Instead, two _whole_ figures stood straight, fingers still on each others arms where they had completed the last symbol milliseconds before Temari's attack had reached them. Sono and Kono's jutsu had not been a summoning jutsu, but instead one of transformation. Where there had once been skin, there was now reddish stone, and a small bit of sand flowing from a few small cracks where Temari's attack had hit its mark. Each of the men had grown in height and musculature, but still remained lithe.

Panting, the sand kunoichi gritted her teeth stoically and gripped her fan tighter, knuckles growing white from the pressure. Moving with uncanny speed, the two golem-like creatures separated and began to circle her. One dove out of it's circling routine, and Temari just barely managed to avoid it's attack, the heavy fist crashing down on the spot where'd she just been, leaving a 3 foot crater.

Shikamaru racked his brain for any ideas on how to escape. Hands joined in a misshapen oval, he surveyed his surroundings. The shadow of the cage stretched out about twenty feet to the right of Kaizuketsu, and the shadows were not nearly big enough to give him enough surface area to reach the metal pirate. Meanwhile, the torches and fires burned lower and lower as time dragged on. _Well that means that all I have to do is–_

Shikamaru's train of thought was interrupted as Kaizuketsu stretched his arms to the side, hands shaped as if they were holding something. Chanting under his breath, the hulking man felt his arms become more and more weighed down as two lances materialized in his hands, the reflected firelight shimmering in dazzling patterns. Kaizuketsu gave Shikamaru a friendly smile as he hefted each of the long stakes, as if they had been old pals.

"Don't worry about escaping, boy. You'll be far, f_ar_ away in a matter of seconds."

Wincing as he felt the phantom ache of being impaled, Shikamaru frantically looked to his right. _Not yet. I need to stall him a little while longer… _With a grunt, Kaizuketsu hurled the first of his javelins, sending it flying on a collision course with Shikamaru's stomach. Shikamaru sidestepped and exhaled as the spear sent out a clanging sound as it glanced off one of the bars before falling harmlessly to the ground.

Wary of what his opponent might have in mind, Shikamaru put his weight on the balls of his feet and readied himself to spring whichever way necessary. Sporting a lazy grin similar to one Shikamaru might show in a less dangerous situation, Kaizuketsu lazily tossed the second of his spears, this time at Shikamaru's right shoulder. Dodging to the left, Shikamaru clearly saw the stake miss him, but felt a sharp stabbing sensation in his thigh nevertheless.

Biting back most of an agonized scream, Shikamaru stared dumbfoundedly down at the six inches of iron that now protruded from his leg. Blood seeped from both sides of the wound created by the first javelin, making the black fabric of Shikamaru's pants even darker, and adding a sticky feeling to them. _Baka, baka, BAKA! He controls metal, so he doesn't have to actually touch it to move it... Now's the time. It might not be, but if it isn't I'm screwed anyways..._

While Kaizuketsu was bathing in his self-glory and coming up with a clever celebratory line to use before finishing off his victim, Shikamaru was using his time in a much more productive fashion. Even as blood and chakra flowed out of the hole in his leg, Shikamaru formed a few handsign before chucking a single kunai and closing his eyes to pray.

Kaizuketsu jumped a mere two feet to his left (Shikamaru's right), and never stopped stroking his chin. The kunai whizzed a little to the left of where his head had been, before thudding harmlessly into the bark of a tree.Kaizuketsu wagged a finger at Shikamaru while making a motherly tut-tutting sound.

"Come on, kid. Did you really think you'd catch me off guard like that?" Shikamaru opened his eyes and shrugged as he moved his final piece into checkmate position. _Life is like a shogi game. Especially the battles._

"In fact, I did." With that, a shadow branched off from the lattice of the cage, and twined around Kaizuketsu's ankles. The man stiffened and stared wideeyed at Shikamaru, while the shadow manipulator shakily rose to his feet. Luckily, the lance had missed the major artery in the leg, or else Shikamaru wouldn't have been able to make it farther than a few feet.

"It always helps that shadows get bigger the lower the position of light is. Without the torches burning low, I'd be a Shika-bob, so to speak."

Shikamaru's punn was interrupted as a painful yell came from where Temari was fighting. Both Kaizuketsu and Shikamaru turned in unison to see a bloodied sand nin land hard on her back. She was up in an instant, but all the spring was out of her step, and it looked like her body was about to give up. Guilty that he had been about to give a speech to Kaizuketsu, Shikamaru decided to end things quickly.

Molding his fingers into a strange shape, Shikamaru took control of his shadow. A dark hand grabbed the shaft of the lance on the ground and brought it back in preparation to throw. Although he was not physically holding the giant shard of metal, Shikamaru felt himself begin to sweat as he exerted the black arm.

He exhaled deeply as the Shadow threw its weapon, opening and closing his eyes as he tried to blink away the drowsiness that had crept over him. Bloodloss. If not for Kaizuketsu's scream, he might have fallen asleep then and there. Willing his eyes to stay open, Shikamaru groaned in exhaustion as he saw that the spear had fallen slightly short of it's target, piercing Kaizuketsu's leg instead of his torso. Even so, the wound had it's intended effect. As blood came in pulses from the large man's leg and bone protruded from the wound, both lances and the cage dissappeared, shattering into thousands of harmless particles.

As Shikamaru released his jutsu and the iron ninja collapsed to the ground, clutching his shattered shin, he felt torn between two options. Finishing Kaizuketsu off was certainly the efficient thing to do, and yet any further time and effort spent on this fallen opponent would take away from what Shikamaru could do to help Temari. Making his decision, Shikamaru turned his back on Kaizuketsu and half-sprinted, half hobbled down the slight slope to where Temari was fighting a losing battle. Bad move.

Gritting back a flow of curse words laced with agony, Kaizuketsu contorted his hand, causing a slender needle to gradually grow out of the skin. Reaching into a special pocket, he withdrew a small container of red liquid. Carefully dipping the senbon in the substance, Kaizuketsu managed a grin that looked more like a grimace. The newly crippled man gingerly kissed the thin shaft of the senbon, closed one eye, and released the spike, aiming for the center of Shikamaru's back.

Shikamaru felt the impact and stiffened slightly, hoping it had just been a biting fly. For a moment dizziness overtook him and he crouched down retching; willing the puke at the back of his throat to stay down for a little while longer. After a few moments of discombobulation, the nauseau passed, and Shikamaru angrily yanked out the senbon, furious at himself for making such a stupid mistake. Whirling around with an uncharacteristic fire in his eyes, Shikamaru hurled the senbon back towards where the enemy ninja had been.

Kaizuketsu was nowhere to be found, having limped off somewhere into the woods, and the senbon only managed to bury itself three quarters of the way into a tree. Shikamaru puzzled a moment over how he could have thrown it that hard before turning back to the battle taking place slightly below him.

Arms heavy, eyes trying to focus on both of her opponents, Temari had her back up against a tree. Sono and Kono, oblivious to the fact that Kaizuketsu had fled, were approaching from different directions, making sure that if she attacked one of them, the other would have a clear opening for a fatal blow.

However, as enhanced as their stone bodies were, neither of them had the good fortune to possess eyes in the back of his head. A few seconds before Shikamaru's shadow captured them both, Temari noticed him and let out a tired sigh, lowering her fan and leaning on it. The rock behemoths had time only to exchange glances of confusion before they both stiffened, muscles twitching uselessly as they tried to figure out what had happened.

Standing in a hunched over postion, Shikamaru had his weight on his right side and was doing his best to bandage the wound on his thigh. Nevertheless, he managed a weak smirk at Temari. She rolled her eyes and the look of relief changed to one of annoyance as her pride took over. Hands on her hips, she scowled at Shikamaru.

"Don't think you just 'rescued' me. I'm not a helpless little girl. I can handle–" She stopped in mid-sentence and took a deep breath, before lowering her voice and eyes. "But thanks..."

Taken aback at her change of character, Shikamaru felt his jaw drop slightly, involuntarily. Gradually his incredulous expression changed into a slightly lop-sided grin.

"I never thought I'd live to see the day... Did you get bonked on the head or something?" Grumbling, she brushed herself off and slung her fan in it's sash.

"Don't push your luck. Remember, _you _needed to be saved from some little pink haired girl with a flute..."

"Yeah, yeah, touché." Feeling the blood loss and chakra loss from holding two strong ninja for so long tiring him out, Shikamaru was relieved when he heard the voices of his friends behind him. The battle was over. Aside from Kiba now being partially bald, no one's body or ego was seriously damaged. Whatever group had decided to attack them had been a hodgepodge of generally weak ninja, thrown together to form a less than impressive raiding squad.

Naruto, Sasuke, Neji, and Lee appeared from over the small hill, each giving exclamations of varying amounts of surprise as they caught sight of the two golems that Shikamaru had captured. Naruto walked up to one and began to poke it mercilessily in different places, while Neji approached Shikamaru.

Body sagging, Shikamaru cocked his head in puzzlement. He could see the Hyuuga's lips moving, but no sound came to his ears. Suddenly a wave of blurry colors exploded in his vision, causing him to stagger backwards, losing control of the jutsu. Although he could no longer hear them, the exhausted ninja felt the ground shake as Sono and Kono regained control of their bodies. He thought he saw Naruto sent flying by one of the monolithic creatures, but he was in the process of falling on his face, so he couldn't be sure.

His face was mere inches from the ground and his foggy mind was shutting down. _Well... this... might... kinda... hurt. _Instead of feeling dried dirt and patches of grass, a pair of arms scooped him up and carried him with a bound to the top of the hill. As he was laid down on the grassy knoll, Shikamaru could have sworn that, through the misty curtain that seemed to cover his eyes, he saw a look of fear or concern on Temari's face. _Her...? Probably... not... I must... be... REALLY... delirious..._

Unconciousness began to overtake him, colors dimming and fading to black. The last thing he felt before falling into deep sleep was a cool hand on his forehead.

**A/N: So, the question is, were those bad things that happened to Shikamaru due to blood loss or the poison? Hmmmm **

**In other news, I'll be updating again in the next week or two, but it will be a special short chapter that's not from either Shikamaru or Temari's POV. Oh and for those of you wondering, this was not the final showdown (not even close.) Thanks for reading! Oh and I'm still looking for a better title...**


	10. A Midsummer Night's Hallucination?

**A/N: HaHA! No answers to any of those questions in this chapter! Oh and sorry it took so long... I expected more time during the Christmas Break, but instead there was less... Anyways, this chapter will be different from the others in that: A. Kaizuketsu is the POV, B. It's not really funny at all (although to some of you, none of these chapters are funny, so it might not be different to you...) and C. the writing is different, due to the fact that it is a different character. I wrote this chapter in order to develop both villains. Kaizuketsu and the weirdo guy from the beginning. Yep, he's BAAAAAACK (although he still isn't a cowboy now -T.O. reference!-) Halfway through, it may seem like I'm just adding in a stupid OC/OC romance, but it's not that simple, and I do like to develop the human side of a "bad guy." Sorry for the long wait/author's note. Enjoy (if you want.) **

Metallic hair glistened in a cold sweat, while dimmed orange eyes surveyed their bleak surroundings. Dragging himself a little farther along the ground, Kaizuketsu burrowed himself into the trunk of a hollow tree, seeking a respite from the cold rain that had begun to fall.

Examining the rough tourniquet he'd tied to his shattered shin, the iron ninja groaned and laid his head back against the moist bark, lacking the breath he would have used to curse. A normal man would have bled out long ago, but even someone of Kaizuketsu's caliber could not hold out on toughness and grit alone.

The tourniquet had slowed the bleeding, but had not stopped it, and a steady trickle dripped down the sides of his leg and into the wet grass, dew and blood mixing. _Now's the time I wish I hadn't flunked that class on medical jutsus... _Laughing dryly, he settled back into the soft moss inside the tree, closing his eyes.

Kaizuketsu was not one to quit easily, but he could tell that he was dying, and figured that if he had to do so, there was no fucking way he was going to do it freezing his ass off out in the rain. _Freezing my ass off inside a tree on the other hand... Now that's a HELL of a lot better... _

Looking for some way to vent his pent-up frustration and anger, Kaizuketsuused the last ounces of his strength to grab a sizable branch from the ground and break it in half. _I shouldn't even BE HERE! _Flinging the broken pieces out into the night, Kaizuketsu collapsed, coughing violently.

_How did I end up here? One minute, an honorable position as Raikage's guard and a full life, the next, shame, dismissal, and then THIS. A hopeless mission on behalf of someone I don't know, for a pathetic sum of money. Maybe I could've done better without the ninja academy's dropouts by my side. _Sighing, his voice dropped to a hush and he looked up at Mars, a brilliant fiery speck in the sky.

"What would you think of what I've done to myself? You were always–" His unanswerable query to the heavens was interrupted by another fit of coughing. Clutching his abdomen, the iron controller fell into a miserable silence.

Somehow the pain had migrated up from his useless leg to his chest, and every ragged breath he sucked in ended in a spike of excruciating aching. But, strangely enough, every second the pain lessened and lessened. Unconsciousness was quick on its way, and whatever death had in store for him followed close on its heels.

After only a few minutes, he almost couldn't feel the discomfort of sticks prodding into his back and the wet clothes that caused him to shiver. Pain faded to a drunken sort of merriment. Even through his befuddled half consciousness, Kaizuketsu couldn't help but laugh bitterly at his predicament. _I'm about to die, and here I am, giddy as a school girl... _

He began to lose track of time. After a few minutes – or hours, he really couldn't tell – his grogginess was interrupted by the soft crunch of feet on leaves. Trying to drag himself up onto his elbows, the wounded ninja collapsed, letting out a strangled gasp of pain. All at once, the hurting was back, replacing the gentle numbness. Still, he tried in vain to crane his neck enough to see whoever it was that was approaching.

_Konoha dogs coming to finish the job? No real need... Maybe some of those good for nothing shits who called themselves 'ninja' survived. Knowing my luck, it's probably some forest animal sensing death and dinner. _

Ceasing his self pitying long enough to frown, he reached into a pocket and withdrew a kunai, before forcing his body to go completely limp. _The most dangerous type of animals is one that is cornered. They should know that._

With that thought, Kaizuketsu closed his eyes and did his best to still his breathing. His knuckles grew white as they tightly clutched the kunai, careful not to let it gleam in the moonlight. His eyes shot open however, at the sound of a feminine laugh. _I know that laugh._

Finding strength that he hadn't been able to find mere moments ago, he rose to a sitting position, straining his eyes out into the darkness, trying to identify the figure that stood roughly ten meters in front of him. He caught the glow of red eyes, accompanied by hair of the same color and sucked in air. _Impossible..._

The woman laughed at his reaction, and although he could not see her face clearly, he could imagine her characteristic smug smirk was there along with the rest of her. Breaking off her laugh, she continued her slow approach, whistling when she caught sight of the gravity of his wound.

"You've slipped since we last met, Kai. The man I know wouldn't let a runty Konoha Chuunin be the end of him."

The already obscure figure in front of him blurred as tears formed in the corners of the tough man's eyes. He choked back a sob and rose further, onto his knees, ignoring the blazing burn coming from his shin. The pain in his chest ceased, giving way to a different ache; coming from deep within his heart.

Time seemed to move in slow motion as she came closer, bending down on one knee before him and flicking a strand of hair out of her face. He blinked once, then twice, attributing this impossible arrival to bloodloss, or perhaps a fever. Even so, a thousand pictures sprang to memory; images of all they had shared.

"H-how...? I... I saw you dead... I buried you with my own two hands..." His voice cracked as the woman in front of him lit a lantern, and light reflected across her fiery red hair. "Hotaru... y-you don't know how much I–"

She interrupted him by putting a finger on his mouth and eased him out from inside the hollow tree onto the grass. _She still has soft hands._ Although there were several scars on her hands from when they'd practiced with kunai together as children, Kaizuketsu could see no blemish in the woman he had loved, and savored the touch he hadn't felt in so long.

"Shut up. Save your energy, moron."

Pulling up the leg of his pants to fully reveal the wound, she put both hands gently on the wound, causing Kaizuketsu to scream out in agony. Sound echoed through the forest, falling only upon the ears of forest creatures. Soon enough, as the healing chakra began to take effect, the bones went back to their proper places and skin gradually reknitted, making for a badly scarred version of his old leg.

As Hotaru took her hands away from his leg and wiped a few beads of sweat from her forehead, he smiled an actual smile for the first time in a long while. _I don't know how this is happening, I don't know if I'm even still alive. What I do know is that I don't want to lose her again. _Grinning, he teased her.

"Still as polite as ever, I see..." Frowning, she flicked him in the forehead, causing him to wince and shake his head. "And gentle too..."

Ignoring him, the kunoichi lay back in the grass and was silent. Just when Kaizuketsu was about to ask if she had died on him again, she sat back up and yawned, stretching like a cat. Pointing to his leg, she raised her thin eyebrows.

"That was quite a wound." Feeling a bit of his old merry self return to him, Kaizuketsu shrugged and cocked his head to the side, grinning.

"Nothing but a needle prick." She glowered at him, unconvinced.

"Mhmm... Sure. If that's what you need to think to maintain your big ego, go right ahead." Catching her eye again, he crawled closer to her and wrapped an arm around her waist, nuzzling her neck. She giggled slightly and wriggled away, like she always did when he tickled her. As he tried to catch hold of her again, she kicked him back.

"Hold on. I come back from the dead and all you can think of is THAT? Besides, you're still suffering from bloodloss. You wouldn't want to put yourself in danger by adding the need for your heart to give blood to a new... appendage, would you?" Kaizuketsu looked down before smiling innocently at her.

"Too late..." Hotaru held back a smile and examined her fingernails.

"Hey, we were lovers a long time ago... Who's to say I'm not into someone new? Or maybe even, some one new is _into_ me?" Grumbling, the metal wielder lay back in the grass.

"Fine, fine, I get it. You're not in the mood." The woman scoffed and threw up her arms.

"As romantic as cold, damp, smelly swamps are..." Kaizuketsu scowled at her, before thoughtfully tapping a finger against his chin.

"Okay. But then tell me how you survived. I saw that Konoha pig run you through. I buried your corpse! There's no way that was just some clone..."

At this, Hotaru's fire seemed to die. The smile faded from her face, and soon she herself began to fade. Kaizuketsu watched in growing amazement and despair as she phased into nothingness, the sound of her voice calling his name ringing in his ears. Pinching himself, examining his healed leg and the fire that still burned next to him, the bewildered ninja tried to determine the line between reality and whatever hellish nightmare he'd fallen into.

The delirious man's trance was broken by the arrival of yet another mysterious figure. His eyes snapped up and he reached for the kunai he had dropped when he heard a soft chuckle from somewhere above him. Drunkenly whipping the dagger up and dragging himself to his feet, Kaizuketsu swayed back and forth, trying to draw a bead on his potential opponent. The crushing disappointment that had washed over him moments before was now joined by frustrated rage.

"What did you do to me, you sick fuck!" Abruptly the laughter ceased and a tall cloaked man appeared out of thin air.

The former thunder nin could barely make out the man's face, but something about it was unreal; inhuman. Not waiting for an explanation, Kaizuketsu hurled the kunai at the man's chest, using the toss as a guise for his second attack, one of his special sen bons he held in his other hand. As expected the man dodged the knife, but he also managed not only avoid the dangerous tip of the needle, but actually catch it and twirl it playfully about on his fingers before tossing it out somewhere into the silent forest.

The man leaned forward, and though the iron manipulator could have sworn the man had just been tall and thin, a short, squat man with a hideous grin appeared instead. His chins wobbled as he laughed, eyes closed to slits, bristly graying walrus mustache full of old meals. In the slurred, delighted voice of a man who has drunken too much, the newcomer spoke.

"Whaddya mean, whaddi do to you?" All at once the fat man was gone, and instead a small girl with pigtails appeared on his left side, holding a stuffed penguin and wailing tearfully.

"All I did mister... sniff sniff... was save you! We found you here in the woods with that awful booboo and we gave you a special Band-Aid! Isn't that right Mr. Woogums?" The girl held her penguin at arms length with one hand, making it nod with the other. In another puff of smoke, the girl was gone almost as quickly as she had appeared.

Flabbergast and taken quite off guard, Kaizuketsu fell backwards, and began to scurry back into the hollow tree. He had to duck to barely avoid being smacked in the nose by a cane that appeared. It's owner, a grizzled, leathery faced old woman, jabbed it into his chin, squinting her eyes to peer at him from behind her crescent spectacles.

"But were you grateful at all? No! I tell you, in my days, my poppy would've beaten you silly. I say he needs to be punished for this insolence!"

Clutching his head in his hands as a thousand other voices ripped through the previous serenity of the woods, voicing their opinions on him. Kaizuketsu screamed in fright.

"What _ARE YOU?!?" _All at once the voices stopped, some in mid sentence, others with disapproving tuts. The willowy man that he had first seen returned and stood quietly before him. When he spoke, it was in a very plain and ordinary voice, so softly, Kaizuketsu had to strain his ears to catch every word.

"I am many, who are one. I am a lover, more so than a fighter, but I do not fear the prospect of violence to achieve what I desire. What are you?"

Furrowing his brow, Kaizuketsu took courage in the fact he wasn't dying a horrible death yet and calmed down. In an earnest, if bitter, tone he replied. "I am a failure to all I have known and loved. It's funny. I threw my life away and yet I still nearly piss my pants when faced with the possibility of losing it. In other, words, I am a disgrace. Why? What does it matter to you?"

The man stepped back into the light, but Kaizuketsu still could not tell anything about his visage, as the man wore some sort of traditional japanese theatre mask. _Chujo, I think it's called. I was never a fan that crap. All a bunch of girly men whining about what's wrong in their lives. _Even so, Kaizuketsu could tell the man was smiling, by the way he purred and rubbed his hands together.

"It matters to me, because I think we could be quite useful to one another. I require a little help, claiming what is rightfully mine." Kaizuketsu stiffened and actually sneered at the man he had been so afraid of moments ago.

"Sorry, bub. I don't know if you caught my earlier fight, but I already had a rather unpleasant stint as a mercenary, and I don't think I'm that eager to be accepting new contracts. Besides, money is meaningless to me." The would be employer put up his hands in an appeasing motion, clucking like a mother hen.

"Of course, of course. Kaizuketsu, a missing nin of your caliber has no need for simple ryu, not when he can achieve by force all he needs. But this Hotaru..." The man paused and smiled nastily underneath his mask, enjoying the wince and pained expression he had inflicted.

Kaizuketsu struggled to contain himself. Part of him wanted to break down and rip off this arrogant bastards head, bloodloss or no bloodloss. The other part told him to wait, that this man might be able to help him in some strange way. Kaizuketsu made his decision and swallowed his pride, an act completely new to him. Body shuddering as he barely kept himself under control, the wounded man ground his teeth.

"How do you know my name? And how do you know hers?"

"I've been watching you for some time. I am Sugekei, a man or woman of many faces. As for your hallucination... it was no hallucination. She was as real as you or I. It is a gift of mine."

Kaizuketsu crossed his arms, biting back a surprised grunt of hope. _ I refuse to be fooled._

"I don't believe you..." Forming hand signs, the thunder nin didn't recognize, Sugekei snapped and in a poof, Hotaru was back, looking around in bewilderment. Catching sight of the man beside her and her former lover in front of her, she began to break down.

"What the FUCK is going on here? Why can't I remember anything! Kai, do something! Don't just gawk at me like a fucktard!" _He's got her eloquent way of speaking down perfectly._

Sugekei sidestepped away from her and put his wrinkled hands over his ears. When Hotaru paused to take a breath, he snapped his finger and she disappeared again. Hands on his hips, Sugekei waited, trying to gauge his opponents reaction.

"That is not the extent of my abilities. Think of it as a sort of prologue to a play. A glimpse of what is to come. Or what _may _come."

Kaizuketsu narrowed his eyes, weighing his options. _I've never seen this man before, and yet he knows as much about Hotaru as I do. No. That's impossible. It must have been her. No one possesses any kind of jutsu that could make a clone that accurate._

Slowly, he rose, and offered Sugekei a tentative handshake.

"What do I have to do?" The man was quick to accept, and chuckled from behind his mask.

"It's quite simple, and I think you'll gain a large amount of satisfaction in the process."

**A/N: Alright, well... Not exactly re-emerging on the fanfic scene with a bang, but I hope it was at least a little bit entertaining. Next chapter is back to ShikaTem, so don't worry. And I know I always promise to update soon, and end up failing miserably, but this time will be different! (I hope.) Thanks for reading.**


	11. Waiting and Changes

**A/N: W00t! Fastest update time in quite a while! Anywho, now it's back to ShikaTem. There's a little fluff here, but it's mainly another setup chapter. Hope you like, and thanks to all my reviewers! If things go as expected, I will break the 100 review mark with this chapter!**

**-Your favorite mongoose (I better be!)**

Steam broiled up from the bucket of hot soapy water as Sakura dipped a rag in it, before handing the sopping cloth to Temari. The medical tent was fairly empty, and most of it's occupants were just caravan drivers that had burned themselves or been trampled by others in their haste to flee.

Shikamaru lay in the center of the tent, unconscious with a high fever, while Sasuke and Naruto were on his left and right. Sasuke was sleeping off a bad case of chakra exhaustion, while Naruto was wide awake and increasingly fidgety.

The noisy blond boy kept trying to push past Sakura, (who was meanwhile longingly looking over at Sasuke's bed) claiming that he was fine and didn't need any attention. Despite the fact that he'd broken an arm during the fight, he seemed to actually be perfectly all right, and the Sand nin marveled at his healing capabilities.

_To be able to heal that fast... It's just as useful as an S-ranked jutsu... If only Shikamaru had that... _Her thoughts came to the assailant that had done this to him, and she gave out a quiet snarl. _Kami hear me, if I find that guy... Oh, I'll make his day very unpleasant._

She started as warm water dripped onto her leg, and realized she had been squeezing the rag hard enough that her knuckles had turned white. Sighing, she resubmersed the cloth and scrubbed it across the bottom of Shikamaru's leg, where blood had caked.

Sakura had managed to heal the wound on his thigh, and, although she had been embarrassed with the job, Temari had agreed to cleaning off the blood that remained. With two fingers she gently felt the place where two feet of iron had pierced his leg, several inches above the knee.

Scar tissue in the form of a circle was beginning to form, but Temari was much less concerned about this wound than the small one in the center of the shadow manipulator's back. There had been no need for healing the wound, and neither Sakura nor Ino had detected any poison, but something seemed wrong about it.

Exhaling slowly, she rolled the pants leg down and covered the half-sleeping, half-unconscious boy with a blanket before losing herself again in thought. _Why would that guy use the last of his strength to attack someone with a harmless senbon? It just doesn't make any sense. ARG! _

She felt her blood boil and forced herself to take several deep breaths._ All right, easy now. Still. They. Say. He'll. Be. FINE. F-I-N-E. So quit your damn worrying and take care of yourself... You really are troublesome._

Eyebrows twitching at the thought of Shikamaru's favorite word, Temari lay back onto an unoccupied medical mat, groaning softly and trying to rub the sleepiness from her eyes. _I still haven't slept. _

Twisting uncomfortably she managed to make out a crack of faint light through the tent flap, signaling she had missed the arrival of dawn. Exhausted, she tried to stifle a yawn, before stretching out on the cot and willing herself to sleep. No such luck.

Letting out a frustrated groan, Temari turned over restlessly, and yanked at the covers, bringing them up around her chin. She could've gone back to the tent she shared with Team 10, but some sense of duty kept her anchored to the medical pavilion.

A little voice at the back of her head piped up; an accusing, guilty voice piercing the back of her skull. _What if there was poison on that senbon? Then whose fault will it be that he had his back to Kaizuketsu? If you hadn't needed to be saved like a weak damsel in distress, then he wouldn't be stuck in that bed, with who-knows-what having a damn party in his bloodstream..._

Clenching her fists underneath the covers, she sat up to examine Shikamaru's still form. _You baka... _She was startled when she felt a hand on her shoulder and a large presence behind her. Turning in mild surprise, she found Chouji standing there, glancing between his friend and her. He had fared well in the battle, suffering only minor injuries. Already, Kiba and Lee were respectfully calling him the Bowling Ball; a nickname he had earned after he had taken down 10 enemy ninja in one fell swoop of his Meat Tank technique.

Despite the presence of a bag of chips in one hand, he was not eating, and instead was trying his best to smile reassuringly at her. _Either he's a mind reader, or I'm being REALLY obvious about my concern... _

"I know Shikamaru seems like a lazy guy, but you shouldn't be fooled. He always does his best to watch the backs of the people he cares about. As Naruto might say, 'that is his ninja way.' He doesn't regret what he did. Trust me." He grinned and finally began munching on his signature handful of potato chips. "I'm sure he'll tell you the same thing soon, when he wakes up_."_

Temari gave him a weak smile in return, restraining herself from muttering a bitter 'Not when, _if.'_ Having finished one package of Oingo's Supreme Potat-Os, Chouji took his hand off her shoulder and rummaged through a canvas bag he'd carried along. She assumed it was full of whatever processed junk it was he craved. Finding what he was looking for, Chouji strolled over to the side of the bed and placed the bag of junk food next to Shikamaru.

"Just in case you're hungry when you wake up, Shika."

Temari rose from her makeshift bed and stood next to the "pleasantly plump" boy. Staring down at the boy-man-thing that had saved her, the sand kunoichi wished she had something to give his sleeping form. Unlike Chouji, who practically carried around an entire vending machine wherever he went, all she could do was stand there, a stubborn lump at the back of her throat.

She had faith that she wouldn't be reduced to tears –no, crying was something she sure as hell didn't do– but nonetheless, she felt a weary sort of helplessness, waiting there as agonizing moment after agonizing moment crept past.

Her head was hung; from underneath her sandy hair, teal globes surveyed every droplet of sweat that formed on her guide's forehead; her heart lurched hopefully every time his eyelids fluttered, only to sink back down when he still did not wake. She spoke in a mild, soft tone, a far cry from her normal voice. Whether she was addressing Shikamaru or Chouji she did not know.

"I'm sorry." Chouji shook his head and folded his arms.

"Temari-san, Trust me. I know him better than anyone. Just like I knew he'd forfeit to you in the Chuunin exams, I know that, given the chance again to do what he did last night, he'd make the same decision." Chouji grinned and prodded his friend with his foot.

"As for his health, he's tougher than he looks. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he had woken up when you weren't watching and just decided to sleep in." This time, she smiled more convincingly, having to hold back an actual laugh at the way Shikamaru grumbled in his sleep when Chouji poked him.

"Thanks Chouji. Not all of you leaf nins are as bad as my people think." Stopping, she looked at him quizzically. "Didn't Ino come too?"

At this, the Akimichi scowled and rolled his eyes, nodding his head in the direction of Sasuke's bedding. Temari sighed and shook her head as she picked up excited squeals from Ino and Sakura. Judging from the miniature celebration going on in that corner of the tent, Sasuke had woken up and was back to his broody, arrogant self. Both Chouji and Temari did a sweat drop and exchanged glances. Catching sight of the discolored bags around her eyes, Chouji raised his eyebrows.

"Have you slept or eaten yet?" The sand kunoichi sheepishly shrugged her shoulders. Chouji raised his eyebrows at the prospect of going a night without sleeping or eating.

"Temari-san, you've been here long enough. You should go back to the tent and sleep. Or go see Shino about eating something. Aside from the occasional chakra bug, his food isn't half bad." Temari examined him closely, to determine whether he was kidding, but couldn't really tell.

"That's all right. I'm perfectly fine here–" Temari was interrupted as she yawned and her stomach gurgled simultaneously. Chouji crossed his arms, smirking slightly, face set in an expression he had obviously gotten from Shikamaru. She glared at him, daring him to say something. He held his tongue and shrugged.

"Suit yourself, I guess..." He paused to scratch his head, before turning to leave, muttering to himself. "I can't understand how someone can go that long without eating... It's just... unnatural..." Shaking his head, he exited the tent, stopping once to look over in Ino's direction and grunt a farewell.

Temari sat down on Shikamaru's bedding, helpless frustration temporarily absent. Putting a cool hand on his feverish forehead, the fan wielder looked around the room, searching for anything to distract herself from the torture that was waiting.

_Dammit, Shikamaru, when you wake up, I'm going to hurt you for making me feel like this. _Searching for anything remotely interesting, Temari settled on watching the rather entertaining scene taking form across the tent from her. Although he had woken up almost ten minutes ago, the Uchiha boy had been unable to move at all, due to two certain, overly enthusiastic girls/paper weights.

Sasuke was having a hard time prying himself away from the two limpets that had vehemently attached themselves to him. Shaking both arms like a pigeon with weights attached to its wings, the possessor of the Sharingan was yelling in an increasingly impatient voice, although what he was saying was drowned out by Sakura's praises and Ino's high pitched squealing.

Naruto, who had at sometime returned to the tent to see Hinata, was busy making faces at his teammate, while Sasuke just brooded, apparently accepting his fate, albeit reluctantly. Temari watched in silent amusement as Sakura and Ino squabbled over the dark boy between them. As the squabble escalated to a full blown argument, both girls let go of Sasuke to prod each other relentlessly, allowing him to slink away unnoticed.

Smile fading, her gaze returned to the cot beneath her, to find two intelligent ochre eyes staring up at her. Starting, she felt a blossom of crimson start to form on her face as she realized how close she had been sitting to him. Speedily removing her hand from his forehead, she regained dignity and rose from his side, pretending to be annoyed rather than relieved. Scowling down, she crossed her arms.

"Oh, so you finally decided to wake up, did you? Typical of you to stay asleep for so long. Pssh, lazy ass." Yawning, he raised his eyebrows at her speech and gave her a small smirk before closing his eyes again and rolling over, stuffing his head under the pillow.

"Screw this, I liked it better when I was unconscious." Temari prodded him in the head with her fan, in a menacing warning.

"Be careful what you wish for, baka... Now get your ass out of bed!" Raising the pillow just far enough to peer out at her, Shikamaru rolled his eyes.

"Geez, you sound just like my mother..." Her eyes narrowed and she snarled at him. _All right, that's it... No more sympathy for the wounded._

Rolling up her sleeves, the wrathful blonde walked around the side of his bed and shoved him out, hard enough to send him rolling a few feet. Still clinging to the pillow, Shikamaru gave her a grumpy glance, before throwing up his arms in concession.

"Fine! What is it with women never letting me sleep?" Strange thoughts came to Temari's mind at that comment, and for a moment her mouth hung open. Shikamaru, realizing what he'd said, pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Gimme a break, I just woke up..." Collecting herself and mentally swatting away those delightfully evil thoughts, Temari shot him a weary look.

"Not all of us had the luxury of sleeping last night..." He cocked an eyebrow in contained disbelief. _How is he always so calm and collected? I wonder what he would be like if he weren't..._

"What, you went and stayed here _all_ night? Why would you do that?" Suddenly feeling very warm and awkward, she looked at him quizzically, noticing the way his voice softened during the last sentence. His eyes had widened too, and he seemed to be looking down at his hands.

"Umm, I don't know... I mean I didn't really need help, but you still risked your life to have my back, so err I guess it was the least I could do." A drop of sweat fell from Shikamaru's clenched fist, and his face had contorted into a frown. _Something's not right... Maybe he's still feeling the effects of the fever?_

"Temari, I... I..." He clamped his jaw shut and looked bewildered. She cocked her head to the side and forced a smirk.

"You feeling all right there? I knew you were fragile, but..." His face, usually the scene of picturesque serenity (and boredom), contorted ever so slightly, and she thought she could make out the outlines of a grimace on his face. Just like that it was gone, but the image remained in her head, disturbing her. Shaking his head, Shikamaru regained his confidence and shrugged.

"I'm fine. I'm going to get something to eat." Bending down, he picked up the slightly crushed bag of potato chips that had rolled with him when he'd been pushed out of bed. Smirking slightly to himself, he tossed the bag up and caught it, shaking his head.

"Heh. Thanks, Chouji."

Temari let out the breath she'd been holding as he started out the door. Unfortunately, he backed right in, a fat, moist finger in his face. Hebezuma, the little rotund man that she and Shikamaru had saved the previous night, looked absolutely livid; not to mention just a teensy bit drunk. The leaf nin looked in control, if just barely, while the caravan leader's face was beet red in indignation. He spoke in a heavily slurred voice, louder than a normal person would, with sentences interrupted by hiccups now and then.

"Oh-HO! Well, well, well! Sleeping hic beauty decided to wake up, did hic she? Do you know how much time we've lost because of you?!?" Swaying on his feet, the pompous man gestured drunkenly at Shikamaru's hair.

"Didja even take the hic hic HIC time to style your damn hair? What is WRONG with YOU!?!

Sakura, ever the pacifier, came in to the picture, seizing Hebezuma by the shoulders and steering him away, sending Shikamaru an apologetic grin. _No need, Sakura. He's not the type of person to retaliate to something as pitiful as that. _Her eyes flicked over to "Sleeping Beauty" and widened as she saw his hand was clenched into a fist. Having spent 12 of her first 15 years living with Gaara during his psycho phase, Temari knew what killer intent looked like. Shikamaru was the last person she expected to see it in, and yet there he was, hand shaking uncontrollably. _What is going on? _

Turning towards the man who had just insulted him, Shikamaru smiled a small smile, that was anything but friendly. His tone was a nearly unrecognizable version of his old one, much like Gaara's old 'I'm polite, but I still want to taste your blood' voice.

"What was that? You seem to have a lot of fun with insults for an insignificant smelly drunk."

The plump man, judgment impaired by the alcohol in his blood stream, whirled around in a ridiculous manner. He thrust his face close to Shikamaru's and made a retching sound. Temari's eyes widened further as Hebezuma spat a wad of discolored saliva onto Shikamaru's forehead. _Oh, this is not going to be good._

This new Shikamaru trembled uncontrollably, muscles tightening and releasing, as he grit his teeth, caught in some internal conflict. Hebezuma had his back turned and Sakura was scolding the rotund man, so Temari was the only one that saw the afflicted Shikamaru's hand reach for the kunai.

**A/N: There it is! I might not be able to update next week, because it is finals for my school, and I'm already pretty screwed in that department… Oh, one more thing. Is my writing too smushed on this page? If it is, any suggestions would be great.**


	12. From Candle to Wildfire

**A/N: Ok, time for the cliffie to be answered! Hooray! You'll get the general gist of what the poison is supposed to do in this chapter. A little fluff and more action await you in the next installment of the fic formally known as AoL. Hope you like.. **

Shikamaru stood there, shocked at what he had almost just said. His palms were sweating and he could feel his heart thumping against his ribcage, threatening to tear free and flop all the way back to Konoha. _What the hell? _

It had seemed so natural. He didn't really have any idea what he was going to say, but he felt in control. Next thing he knew, he was about to say something he would have no doubt regretted. _I was going to tell her that? I don't even know if that's true. _Looking at his feet, Shikamaru ran a hand through his hair.

_Besides, she'd just laugh in my face anyways... _Unaware that he'd suddenly frozen up, Shikamaru was startled by the inquisitive sound of Temari's voice. She had her head cocked to the side and was looking directly into his eyes, searching for some answer. For some reason the eye contact made his heart beat even faster, and he felt his breathing quicken. _What's with this?_

"You feeling all right there? I knew you were fragile, but..."

The way she trailed off and left him hanging with that smirk of hers... it sent him spiraling downwards in a nosedive. His teeth clenched and he felt the corners of his mouth slightly. Suddenly the pain that had been with him before Temari had come was back in full force. All the self doubt and insecurity stormed through his mind, nearly sending him to his knees.

It was as if a floodgate had been opened, as a thousand images of lovers coursed through his mind's eye coupled with random portraits of people pointing at him and laughing, each one a painful reminder of the love he had never had. _Why is this happening now? Nobody else cares, so why should you? Get a hold of yourself and stop being a damn drama queen!_

In reality it was only a split second, but to him it seemed like hours that he stood there, doubled over, struggling to regain control of his emotions. Finally, he straightened up and regained his normal expression. He had been so close to snapping and... He didn't know what would have happened. _I wouldn't have just broken down and cried, would I? Ugh... I need to get out of here before I do something I'll regret. _He shook his head and gave Temari a shrug.

"I'm fine. I'm going to get something to eat."

Forcing himself to make a dignified retreat, Shikamaru slowly counted to five, then bent and picked up Chouji's package of potato chips. Putting on his characteristic slight smirk, he tossed the bag up in the air and caught it deftly.

"Heh. Thanks, Chouji."

Assured he'd put on a convincing façade, Shikamaru made a slow and purposeful bee-line for the puke-green flap that marked the tent's exit. Closing his eyes to shield himself from the brightness, the chuunin stepped outside, and exhaled deeply as a cool breeze soothed him.

He realized just how much he'd been sweating, and wiped droplets from his forehead. Sighing, he looked up at the sky, where two clouds floated, separated by a thin line of blue sky. The wind had some strange effect on them, blowing them closer and closer together, before tugging them apart. _Troublesome clouds._

Biting his lip in thought, Shikamaru thrust his hands into his pockets and stared down at the earth in front of the tent in deep speculation. _What was on that Senbon?... I don't feel like I'm in pain, but there's something... Like a fog in my brain that keeps me from controlling myself. If I let my emotions run rampant, bad, bad, BAD, things might happen. Especially with the Sand-witch..._

Realizing he had just been standing there, Shikamaru began to slowly move forward, still examining every speck of dirt on the ground. He was surprised when he ran into a plump, rounded figure... that smelled like sake. Lots of sake. Eyes rising, Shikamaru caught sight of Hebezuma and raised his hand, beginning an apology.

"Uh, sorry. I didn't see–"

The rotund balloon of a man just stared at him for a moment, obviously befuddled by the spirits he'd consumed. Then a glint of recognition appeared and a fat finger was thrust in the chuunin's face. Blinking in confusion, Shikamaru took several steps backwards, but found the meaty digit still threatening to... _Pick my nose? Poke out an eye? What's his problem?_

Even through his drunken stupor, the caravan leader managed to find an outlet for whatever frustration had been mounting inside him. That outlet happened to be a certain spiky haired leaf ninja. For a moment Hebezuma just stood there, eyes white with anger, snorting, like bull doped up on testosterone. His face grew redder and redder until Shikamaru swore he could see steam come out of the man's ears.

Shikamaru retreated a few more feet and found himself right back in the place he'd been so desperate to escape only moments earlier. A dozen pairs of eyes caught sight of the spectacle, before turning away in a hurry, so as not to provoke the wrath of the pudgy human porcupine.

"Oh-HO! Well, well, well! Sleeping hic beauty decided to wake up, did hic she? Do you know how much time we've lost because of you?!?" Shikamaru stiffened and he felt his eyelid twitch. _What did he call me?_

Swaying unsteadily, Hebezuma waved his hand at Shikamaru's hair. Frothing at the mouth, the small man threw his hands up in the air.

"Didja even take the hic hic HIC time to style your damn hair? What is WRONG with YOU!?!"

In him, Shikamaru felt something throb, a piercing pulsation at the back of his head. The small voice that sometime reminded him of his own stupidity was back, but now it wasn't so small. Shikamaru tensed as he heard a distorted version of his own voice inside his head, mocking and enticing him at the same time.

'_You save his life, and this is how he treats you? You never fight back. That's why everyone's always giving you grief about everything you do or don't do. Strike back. Just once. I promise it will feel good.'_

Sakura, sensing the tension, had jumped between them and was doing her best to steer Hebezuma towards a medical cot. Shikamaru felt his eye twitch again and noticed his fist was clenched as well. _What is this? This isn't me..._ He was surprised to find himself speaking. Keeping his voice dangerously low, he called out to Hebezuma, a strange smile on his face. _Just once. All right. Just this one time._

"What was that? You seem to have a lot of fun with insults for an insignificant smelly drunk."

For a moment, Shikamaru felt a sense of immense relief, like a great weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He shuddered slightly, basking in the feeling of power he had missed out on for so long. Then he returned to his senses, and felt a pang of regret. _What did I just do? Who cares if he deserved something like that, I still shouldn't have said it..._

The chuunin's moment of regret was interrupted as he felt something wet strike him in the forehead. Staring in disbelief as the caravan driver finally let himself be led away by Sakura, Shikamaru slowly reached up and wiped the loogie from his face. There was a moment of calm, before the voice was back, this time screaming for blood instead of insults. Trembling in silent fury, he had time to wonder what exactly it was he was going to do, before it took over. Shikamaru felt his hand contort and reach for the kunai at his side. _Oh, crap. The Lady Hokage is not going to like this. I am so dead. 'Maybe so... BUT HIM FIRST!' _

Pupils rolling back into his head, Shikamaru drew the knife and made a blind dash for Hebezuma, intent on skewering the fat man. He imagined a steady stream of blood flowing from Hebezuma's torn flesh, and a sadistic smile flashed across his changed face. A picture of the man lying on his back, mouth agape and eyes sightless, flashed through Shikamaru's mind's eye. _YES!_ He heard Sakura let out a little gasp, and saw Hebezuma start to turn his head. Then...

Then Shikmaru landed hard on his back, and a slender but strong hand knocked the kunai out of his hand, sending it skittering across the dirt floor. Confused at the failure of his assault, Shikamaru looked up at Temari, who had him pinned down. The Kunoichi had tackled him at the last moment, preventing him from plunging the blade into Hebezuma's chest. She remained on top of him, holding him in a gentle but firm grip.

Shikamaru started to snarl, but felt the fire within him start to cool, and the fog dissipated within his head. Relaxing his muscles, he was reduced to sweating profusely and wondering what was going to happen now. _What have I done?_ Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath before looking up, expecting to see some sort of fear or anger in Temari's eyes. There wasn't any. Temari stared down at him, a look of wary concern in her teal eyes.

She slowly let her grip on his arm and shoulder loosen, finally letting go completely. Her pupils remained locked on his, silently searching for some sort of explanation for what had just happened. At last, she spoke so only he could hear her, choosing her words carefully.

"I might not know a whole lot about you, but from what I've seen, you aren't the type of blockhead that goes around spontaneously assaulting the clientelle... What exactly just happened...?"

_Temari? Quiet and concerned? Maybe I hit my head when she tackled me?... 'Heh, speaking of which, she's still on top of you...' _Realizing the voice was right, Shikamaru, felt his body twitch a little.

_Who the hell ARE you and where did you come from? _The voice laughed heartily before trailing off._ 'Oh shut up and enjoy the situation! Damn, you really need to learn how to live a little.' _Shikamaru tried his best to maintain his dignity, but he felt a tiny shiver go up his spine as the girl on top of him shifted her weight. _'See what I mean?'_

Shaking his head to clear away the voice,Shikamaru wiped a bit of sweat off his forehead before thinking of an answer. It was like he hadn't been in control. It was like he was a puppet, and someone or something else was pulling the strings. Yet it _had_ been him. He had felt the pleasure of the idea of inflicting pain on Hebezuma, the weight of the kunai in his hand, and the feel of rough dirt between his bare toes as he had charged.

He opened and closed his mouth a couple times, trying to gauge the best possible way to say what he meant. Before he could come up with the words, Ino, who was oblivious to the spectacle that had taken place, was standing beside Temari, grinning gleefully down at him. Completely ignoring the frozen-in-shock figures of her best friend and current employer, Ino whistled at the situation she saw before her. _Ugh. When the gossip queen gets her claws into something like this, everybody finds out. How troublesome. _

"Oh Temari-san. I don't know what he did to make you tackle him, and I'm sure he deserved it, but I think you should get off him. You could be hurting him... or worse. Are you enjoying yourself down there Shikamaru?"

He mustered an annoyed glare.

"Why don't you go find a mall out here or something? I'm sure the forest creatures would be happy to show you the way to the nearest Nordstroms..."

Ino glared at him for a moment before storming off. Temari, who had been frozen by Ino's words, stirred, and hastily got off of Shikamaru. Brushing herself off, she gave him a small smile, but he could still see the careful concern in her eyes.

"You handled that well. But, you never told–"

His eyes widened as a stick came crashing down towards his face. Raising his arm, he shielded himself from the blow, wincing at the cracking sound of wood on bone. Hebezuma, frothing at the mouth, stood above him, complete with veins pulsating in his neck. Saliva sprayed from his mouth as he screamed at the top of his lungs.

All traces of drunkenness were gone, replaced by the fiersome yappy-little-dog anger that small people with Napoleon complexes often have. _Still, yappy little people can be dangerous when they're carrying canes..._

Shikamaru's wry humor left him as Hebezuma brought the mahogany cane down on his arm again. The leaf nin sent the caravan driver a wrathful sneer as he caught the cane on its third descent. Twisting the rod out of Hebezuma's grip, Shikamaru hopped nimbly to his feet and brandished it. As he made a swing at the spiky haired man, a flash of black and blond came between them.

Eyes flashing, Temari showcased her strength, siezing both of them by their collars and pulling them apart. An expression of exasperated frustration on her face, she let out a sigh, eyebrows twitching in disbelief.

"What the hell is wrong with you men? For Kami's sake!" Her grip tightened as Shikamaru writhed in her grasp, swinging the cane blindly at Hebezuma. "You. What happened to Mr. Mature? Why don't you just... go over there!" Narrowing her eyes at him, she tossed him back onto the medical cot, sending him sprawling. He landed in a heap and sat up, but stayed where he was, giving Temari his best old-wet-cat look. Still, returning to his senses, Shikamaru breathed a sigh of relief. The boiling blood within his veins cooled, and he resumed his normal slumped position.

Hebezuma, meanwhile, was still livid. Overconfident in his strength, he was wriggling in Temari's grasp, clawing at the hand that had him firmly by the shirt. Shikamaru looked around, expecting to see everyone watching. Instead, all the ninja had left, including Sakura, and the patients were all examining their shoes or pretending to be asleep.

"You... LITTLE BITCH! Who do you think you are, you little sand WHORE?!?"

His gaze returned to Hebezuma in time to see the man slap Temari across the face. Temari simply shrugged it off and held the caravan driver even harder. As far as she was concerned, it was nothing. Then Shikamaru blinked.

When he opened his eyes again, Hebezuma was on the ground beneath him, sputtering blood from a broken mess that had been his nose. He stared up at the chuunin with wide, fearful eyes, surprised that Shikamaru had ceased beating him. Shikamaru meanwhile, stared down in incredulity. Shikamaru noticed the crimson gloop that was spread across each row of his smarting knuckles and blinked a few times, trying to figure out what had happened. Temari, who had been busy trying to tug him off, finally succeeded, and they collapsed in a heap a few feet away.

Feeling light headed, Shikamaru struggled to keep his eyes open. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Neji and some of the others enter the tent. Neji knelt by the wriggling form of Hebezuma, before turning his gaze towards Shikamaru. He had never seen the Hyuuga so shocked. The sound began to fade from his surroundings as Neji addressed Temari. Temari pointed angrily at Hebezuma, then frantically towards Shikamaru. He had never seen her lose her cool like this. He blinked hard and massaged his temples with heavy hands. He felt so tired.

Everyone was looking at him expectantly, like he was supposed to say something. His brain felt like mush, and his vision was blurring by the second. _Unn... How troublesome. Men aren't supposed to faint... _Shikamaru raised his head for a moment and put up a finger, like he was about to say something. Then his head fell back onto the soft earth and he blacked out.

**A/N: My, my! Someone's changed, hasn't he? Well what will Neji decide to do with him? They're still only half way to their destination… Oh and I almost forgot! Last chapter's reviews brought the number up over 100! Yay! You guys are awesome, and one main reason I write is to entertain folks like you. NOW REVIEW SOME MORE! GERBIL LORD FU COMMANDS IT!**


	13. And in this corner TEMARI!

**A/N: Sorry it took me a little longer than two weeks to update. I don't really have an excuse... Anyways, here's chapter whatever-it-is. It's kind of a set up chapter, giving me time to think of brilliant ideas which have eluded me for the last few weeks. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy, and I don't think it's that bad.**

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

Neji sat cross-legged, a hand across his brow, frowning down at the dirt in speculation. Sakura sat on his left, while Temari crouched in silent apprehension on his right. Each had given their own accounts of Shikamaru's actions, and were waiting for the team leader's decision on what to do. Shikamaru was currently confined to the insides of tent, with Lee and Sasuke more or less standing guard. Hebezuma was still in shock from the incident and was recovering from his broken nose inside his 8 'room' luxury tent.

In spite of the current situation, Temari couldn't help but smirk slightly. The only words Hebezuma had managed to mutter in his newly found nasal voice were 'By face! By beautiful face!'

At last, Neji rose wearily, and poked his head out the tent flap. Workers were already busy packing up the tents, saddling the oxen into their yokes, and getting ready to get back on the road. He had to make up his mind fast. Pacing back and forth, Neji found his usual cool demeanor fraying at the edges. Finally he came to a stop and sighed.

"While I am not particularly close to Shikamaru, I have worked enough with him to know that his actions of late are a bit... out of character. This, coupled with the senbon wound on his back, suggest that some sort of substance has to do with his change in personality."

Temari started to relax. _Maybe he's off the hook... For now. _Her hope died as Neji's gaze hardened.

"However, Sakura tells me that the substance is untraceable and is not effecting any vital systems. For a few low level mercenary ninjas to be in possession of something so advanced, seems highly unlikely. We don't have the time or resources to sit around trying to find a cure. I'm sorry to say that until we get to Kumogakure, all we can do is keep an eye on him. We'll keep a guard or two on him, but we may need to use force if he causes anymore problems. When we get to Kumo, he'll have all the best medical attention."

Eyes widening, Temari stood up in disbelief.

"What? For all you know, he could be dead by the time we get to Kumogakure! You and I both know that is a boneheaded plan... Neji-san." Temari barely kept her temper in check, adding the respectful suffix to recognize his rank. Neji just looked at her, the exhaustion apparent in his eyes. He maintained a civil tone, but Temari could tell she was giving him a headache. _If it changes his mind, then that's a good thing._

"While I understand where you're coming from, let me remind you, Temari-san, of the importance of this mission. Suna did not fight in the great war between The Land of Lightning and Fire. The destruction was great enough that both countries are hesitant to put things behind them. Every move we make reflects Konoha." Temari's eyes narrowed into slits and she crossed her arms. Sakura, who was beginning to get upset at the palpitating tension, spoke in a nervous voice.

"We're only a day's journey from Konoha, why not just send him back with a small escort?" Neji set his neutral gaze on her.

"His leg will keep him from traveling at a quick pace. It would take at least two days. I can't afford to send anyone back with him, due to the possibility of another, more dangerous sneak attack."

Sakura and Temari both opened their mouths in protest, but Neji silenced them with a stern look. _This guy acts like he's an uptight old man already._

"As team leader, I have the responsibility of making the choices, both simple and complex. I'm sorry, but the mission comes first, and that's final."

Sakura shut up, and looked down in a resigned fashion. Temari, on the other hand, was not the type of person to be dismissed so casually. She felt her hair prickle as helpless anger coursed through her. Thinking of Shikamaru's calm demeanor, the sand kunoichi forced herself to calm down, unclenching her fists and willing her heart beat to slow down.

Neji's self confident neutrality flickered for a moment as a small smirk flashed across Temari's face. Sensing that she was going to talk, the Hyuuga crossed his arms and frowned slightly.

"Yes, Temari-san?"

Temari's smirk widened as she tapped her hitai-ite. She put her hands on her hips and savored the victory.

"You forget, Neji-san, that I am not from Konoha. While I have submitted to your leadership so far, I am by no means required to do so. I am under my own command, and I choose to accompany the Nara kid back to Konoha." Neji just stood there, nodding slightly.

"And you personally accept the risks that come with this task?" Temari dipped her head, eyes narrowing slightly as she thought she saw the corners of his mouth tugged upwards slightly in a small smile.

Whatever _it_ was, it vanished in an instant, and Neji was his grave self again. He slowly nodded, and looked at her searchingly.

"All right, you have a valid point. You should depart as quickly as possible, in case he acts up again." Neji dropped his civility for a moment and gave her a warm, if slight, smile. "I know you'll get him home safe."

Eying the Byakugan user apprehensively, Temari left as quickly as she could. As she exited the tent, she felt a surge of inexplicable relief. Dazed, she sat back against the mossy bark of a tree, feeling the ache of sore muscles, and the pulsating pain of a headache.

For once, she felt the desire to just lie down and look at the clouds, letting her body and mind recuperate. _No rest for the wicked._ She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, before rising and stretching.

Approaching the tent Shikamaru occupied, Lee stepped in front of her, an apologetic expression on his face.

"I'm sorry, Temari-san, but I'm not supposed to–" Temper flaring, the impulsive woman shot a death glare at him, scaring him into silence. Grinding her teeth, she tossed her head in Neji's general direction.

"Go talk to Neji if you want an explanation, but I'm seeing Shikamaru NOW." Gulping, Lee shambled off towards Neji, muttering something about Temari "bursting with TOO much youth."

Paying no further thought to Lee, Temari bent her head, entering the small tent that served as Shikamaru's holding cell. He sat cross-legged, head bent, examining his bruised knuckles dejectedly.

He looked up slowly, and bit his lip when he saw who it was. She crossed her arms, waiting for some kind of greeting, but none came. Hating every moment of the awkward silence, Temari spoke, before taking a seat across from him.

"Well I'm happy to see you too, Mr. Talkative." Shikamaru smiled slightly, and he met her gaze. He responded in a measured, guarded voice.

"You're not going to treat me like some kind of monster?" Temari gawked at him, before recovering.

"What? No. I made that mistake with Gaara when he needed someone, and that almost ended badly. Plus, if you ask me, Hebezuma had it coming. For a fragile guy, you pack a nice left hook." Shikamaru relaxed and donned his crooked half smile.

"I told you, I'm not _that _fragile." Sighing, he rested his chin on his left hand and continued to look her in the eyes. "Have they figured out what's wrong with me?"

Temari shook her head. Shikamaru wearily aimed a lazy punch at the down bedding beneath him. "I hate it when I don't understand what's going on. It makes me pissy."

Temari chuckled softly, before deciding to get down to business.

"Get your duffel bag and pack up. We're going back to Konoha." Confusion swirled in Shikamaru's eyes and he cocked his head to the side.

"What we're just abandoning the mission?" Temari shook her head.

"No, but you need better medical analysis." Shikamaru frowned.

"We can't spare anyone to take me back, if there's another attack– Neji would never–" Feeling warmth rush to her cheeks, Temari cut him off.

"Just me. I'm not under his command. Now get packing, we're leaving soon." He just looked at her, mouth open slightly, searching her eyes for something.

Then his eyes fogged over over for a moment. Temari noticed, and started to ask him if he was all right, before she felt a gentle hand on her cheek. Stiffening up like a board, Temari painstakingly brought her eyes to the place where Shikamaru was touching her. A flood of butterflies stormed into her stomach as she struggled for words. He surprised her even more when he spoke in an innocent, earnest, voice, as if he was doing nothing spectacular. _This must be another effect of the poison..._

"You still haven't slept? Go lie down or something, we can leave in a couple hours." Finally she found her voice. She mentally slapped herself as it came out all wavery and unsteady.

"Shikamaru...!" He looked at her, puzzled, and light gradually returned to his eyes. He gaped, and took his hand off her cheek as if he'd been burned. Temari felt her brain begin to function again, but was surprised to feel disappointment in her stomach at the absence of his touch. Her anger flared at the thought of a mere touch destroying all her composure and intellect.

Shikamaru meanwhile must have caught sight of the hint of anger on her face. Flinching, he expected some sort of violent response, but Temari just kept sitting there. Seeing an opportunity to escape, Shikamaru crept past her out the door, stopping only to offer a rushed wave.

"I'm going to go pack. Bye."

Temari continued to stare down at her balled fists. Exasperated, she blew a strand of hair out of her face. Her heart eventually resumed beating at its normal pace. She felt her brain begin to whir, and images of Shikamaru began to flash through her mind like a third rate slideshow. Frustrated, she flicked turned off her brain and collapsed on the bedding, falling asleep before her head hit the pillow.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Hundreds of miles away, Gaara sat in his study, staring down at the towering stack of papers in front of him. On it's right was an equally tall stack that he had already looked over and approved, filling out the necessary forms and signing his name in the necessary locations. Sighing, he imagined what Temari was doing.

Almost immediately after sending her away, he'd felt guilty. Being alone in a foreign country probably wasn't all that enjoyable._ She's a sturdy girl. I'm sure she can tough it out. Maybe she'll find some entertainment in the Nara boy._ Gaara could tell that she secretly found Shikamaru amusing. She would rather be pickled alive in a boiling vat of acid than admit it, but it was still clear to him.

Gaara dropped his pen and swiveled around in his chair, taking a moment to observe the beautiful sandstorms that raged across the dunes. He was again reminded of another pressing matter; his sister's marriage._ I can't withhold her choice from the other houses for much longer. Trouble is, she'd eat any of those suitors alive before marrying them. Women are puzzling creatures, but I can't say I blame her... hmm. I wonder if Naruto would still desire to be Hokage if he knew it involved this much paperwork and frustration... Truth be told, I could use a bit of vacation._

Straightening up, his lips formed a small smile. Remembering his promise to Temari that he would visit her in Konoha, the red haired Kazekage had an idea. True, it had only been a few days since she had left, and she was currently away on a mission, but Gaara needed a break, and he also wanted to catch up with the boy that had changed his life during Suna's ill fated invasion. _Of course, I still have to convince Kankuro to come..._

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of intent giggling, followed by a squeal and a fit of roaring laughter from the floor above. Gaara's smile faded, to be replaced by shame and anger. He had a pretty good idea as to why his father had had a penthouse installed directly above his office (as well as why all of the fourth Kazekage's secretaries had been 'well equipped'.) Ever since Kankuro had started up his father's old tradition, Gaara's work had gone from frustrating and tedious to frustrating, tedious, and disturbing. Rising from his chair, Gaara ascended the stairs, intent on dragging Kankuro with him to Konoha.

Stepping into the lavishly decorated penthouse, Gaara was at once met by the foul odor of sake and cigarettes. Kankuro, lacking his hood and makeup, was seated on a black leather love seat, facing away from the staircase, a scantily clad girl clinging to his arm, giggling incessantly as Kankuro whispered something in her ear.

Gaara frowned in disapproval as he caught sight of the girl's face. It was the third different woman Kankuro had brought there in the past week. Clearing his throat, the Kazekage smiled inwardly as his brother whirled around. Kankuro, seeing the look in his brother's eyes, was crestfallen and angry at the same time. Gaara noticed to his slight disappointment, that the woman was eying him like he was something monstrous and inhuman. _Some people will never accept the fact that I've changed._

Kankuro meanwhile, had risen from his comfortable seat and was tapping his foot antsily, while the girl had rushed into the bathroom with the rest of her clothes. Gaara fixed his cool gaze on Kankuro and at once the puppeteer quit tapping his foot.

"I don't believe you've introduced her to me. Or do you only introduce the ones that last longer than a week?" Kankuro scowled at him.

"Damn, you're such a cock blocker. What are you, my mother?" Gaara narrowed his eyes a little, letting Kankuro know he was skating on thin ice. Kankuro noticed and forced himself to mellow out.

"All right, whatever. What do you want, bro?"

"We're going to Konoha to visit Temari." Kankuro groaned and shook his head.

"Like hell we are! You can go if you want, but I'm staying here. Konoha's full of dweeby guys and flat girls. Besides, Temari's only been gone for five days!"

Gaara smiled slightly and stuck a hand out towards the window. For a minute Kankuro stared at him like he had gone bonkers, but then there was a soft scraping sound just outside the window.

Kankuro's eyes bugged out a little as they caught sight of a hand made out of sand, perched on the window sill menacingly. The girl, who had just come out of the bathroom in a fancy kimono, let out a small 'eeek' before taking cover behind the couch.

"I promised Temari, and I don't like to go back on my word."

Grumbling, Kankuro exhaled and started to gather up his things.

"Fine, fine. You've got to stop doing that. It's way creepy. Just give me a sec to get my face-paint on." It was Gaara's turn to roll his eyes.

"We both know it takes you more along the lines of an hour Doesn't it embarrass you to spend more time putting on makeup then Temari?"

"Oh, shut up."

XXXXXXXXXX

Temari awoke to the sound of crickets. For a moment, she just burrowed back into the soft comfort of the bedding beneath her, but with a groan, she remembered the task on hand, and dragged herself upright. Stretching, she was surprised at how good she felt. _Who would've guessed how much good a couple of hours of sleep can do you?_

Sauntering out of the tent, Temari's jaw dropped as she was met by a blanket of dark shapes, and light from a single fire. _Damn it, I slept the whole day? _Shaking her head in embarrassment, she walked to the fire, where a single person sat. Shikamaru looked up and scowled at her for some reason.

Shikamaru poked one of the logs in the fire with a stick, causing a flurry of sparks to shoot up into the air.

"Everybody else already left. They got tired of waiting for you to wake up. You're really troublesome, even when you sleep, you know that?" Temari plunked down across from him and glared at him. _Why is he always so glum?_

"Why are you so grumpy? And if you people were so impatient, why did you let me sleep so long?"

Shikamaru grumbled and turned the side of his face. Even in the firelight, Temari caught sight of a black eye starting to form on the left side of Shikamaru's face.

"Whoa, what happened? Did you pick a fight with Lee during a drug induced frenzy?"

Shikamaru shook his head and kept staring at her.

"Why are you looking at me? I didn't do anything!" Shikamaru gave her a skeptical look.

"You're violent. Even in your sleep. After you'd been asleep for about 3 hours, I tried to wake you up by yelling at you, and when that didn't work, I tried poking you. Apparently you were dreaming or something, because you kicked me in the face." Shikamaru rubbed the back of his head and added in a slightly whiny voice.

"Hard, too."

Temari stared at him in incredulity for a moment, before bursting out laughing.

"Oh wow. Come to think of it, I _did_ have a dream about an A rank mission I did a while ago. You got to play the part of Hideously Maimed and Beaten guy #1!" Shikamaru just stared at her glumly, before stifling a yawn and lying back in the soft dirt. Temari frowned at him and rose again.

"Lighten up, cranky pants. I hope that's not your first battle scar, because that would be sad."

"I would hardly call that a battle." Shikamaru, eager to change the subject, posed a question.

"So when are we leaving in the morning, O Wise and Esteemed Squad Leader?"

Temari grinned at his sarcasm and pretended to think for a moment. Catching sight of the tired bags under his eyes, she had a wicked idea.

"Oh, I'd say we should leave around dawn. That way we can make good progress and get there around noon the day after tomorrow." Shikamaru's eyes bugged out and he looked like he was about to cry.

"That's... that's just criminal!" She smirked at him and kicked dirt onto the fire, quenching the flickering flames.

"Look on the bright side, at least the human motorboat isn't here to keep us up all night." Shikamaru scowled again, but followed her into the tent, unrolling his sleeping bag and sprawling out.

"I'd rather spend the night with Chouji than the World's next Heavyweight champion." Temari looked venomously at him, eyes blazing. She roared.

"ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT?!?" He gave her a smug smile and crossed his arms.

"Maybe. Why?" Her foot rushed towards his face to give him his answer.

"Ow! HEY! Not cool! Not cool! Fine! Men's kick boxing champion? DAMMIT, THAT HURTS!" Temari bared her teeth at him and prepared for another fel swoop.

"You just don't know when to quit do you?"

**XXXXXXXXXXX**

**A/N: Meh. Not sure if I like the way I ended the chapter, but that's ok. I'll try to get the next chapter up sooner. :D**


	14. Pleasant and Unpleasant Soaring

**A/N: Sigh... Several weeks of depression, sickness, and downright exhaustion later, here's chapter 14. I feel really bad about being so late with this, I just had a rough few weeks for no reason in particular... However, never fear, it will not affect the storyline or mood of this fic. **

Misshapen mirrors surrounded Shikamaru, portraying him in all sorts of unflattering ways. Breathing hard, he looked around for some means of escape, aside from the doorway he'd just come through. Sweat trickled down his neck and his ears pricked at the sound of heavy footsteps behind him. _What the hell is chasing me?_ Slamming the door shut, Shikamaru felt his heart begin to thump hard against his ribcage. Hearing the footsteps halt, Shikamaru took a fighting stance, ready to make a last stand if necessary. Silence. _Maybe it went– _THWACK!

Shikamaru couldn't help but jump as the door groaned and threatened to give. Guttural grunting came from the hall, accompanying the rhythmic clunk of a broad shoulder against the door. An explosion of nausea brought Shikamaru to his knees, clutching his chest in agony. Staring down, he gaped in disbelief as liquid skin seeped between his fingers into a bubbling mass on the floor. He yelled in mounting terror as he felt something wriggling underneath his grip. 

A reddish lump of tissue broke free and lay, pulsating, on the ground a few feet from him. The organ beat for a few seconds before rolling into the shadows. Shikamaru only had a few seconds to sit in stunned incredulity before the door splintered, small shreds of wood showering down onto him. Back against the wall, Shikamaru's mouth gaped at the creature in front of him. 

It's skin was rubbed raw, muscles and tendons showing in places as it shambled towards him. Mouths, ears, noses, and eyes covered it's body, and it's misshapen limbs all ended in rotting clubbed feet or crab claws. Worse yet was the fact that its face was a distorted version of his own, transformed by a hideous snarl and sightless eyes. For a moment it opened its mouth to taste the air, before fixing it's blind gaze on him and grinning.

XXXXXXX

Shikamaru woke up, pale and sweaty, but otherwise unharmed. Rubbing the last traces of sleep from his eyes in bewilderment, he sat up. Judging by the golden glow on the horizon, it was sometime shortly after 6:00. Creakily, Shikamaru crawled out of the sleeping bag and pulled on his black shirt. _I don't remember eating any magic mushrooms... I haven't had a nightmare in who knows how long. Weird. _His thoughts were interrupted as Temari entered through the tent flap, blinking in surprise. 

"You actually woke up on your own? I am soooo proud of you." She started to laugh, before noticing he had blanched and his hands were trembling. Cocking her head to the side, she frowned slightly at him.

"You feeling all right, Pineapple head?" He blinked and waved her off, all ready stuffing his sleeping bag into a rucksack.

"Yeah, I'm just peachy." Temari looked at him strangely, before shaking her head and taking her bag outside. Shikamaru sighed, realizing he was practically radiating edginess and anxiety.

As he stepped into the clearing, he brightened slightly at the scent of food. Stretching, he plopped down onto the soft earth and sat cross-legged, hungrily eying the food inside the frying pan Temari was holding. She smirked sideways at him, noticing the improvement in his mood. With one flip of the skillet, she sent the meat paddies flying and expertly speared them on four kebab sticks. 

Handing two to Shikamaru, she watched in amusement as he tried to restrain himself from wolfing them down. Grinding his teeth, Shikamaru forced himself to take one dignified bite at a time. Puzzling over the peculiar, yet delicious taste, he waved one of the sticks at Temari.

"What is this? It's actually pretty good." Temari beamed at him, causing him to cock an eyebrow. _Uh oh._

"Why thank you! I think that's the closest you've come to complimenting me. And don't tell me you've never had ground prairie oysters before?" 

Shikamaru paused in mid bite, eye twitching and his face turning a strange color of pea green. When he looked like he was about to hurl, Temari patted him consolingly on the back, looking smug. Sputtering, he managed to force down the bite he'd been chewing. The thought of consuming another mammal's reproductive organs was not pleasant to him.

"You're kidding, right?" Temari shrugged and rose, kicking dirt on the fire and shouldering her bag. 

"You know what? I'm not going to tell you. But it _is_ a delicacy in Suna." Shikamaru eyed the last half of his kebab warily, before sticking it in the earth for some forest animal. Muttering, he grabbed his duffel and slung it across his back.

"There is no chance in hell I'm ever going to Suna, then. Crazy people..." 

Temari flashed a smirk at him and turned away. Leaping gracefully onto a branch several yards of the ground, she called back to him.

"And what makes you think we'd ever want you, lazy?" Shaking his head, Shikamaru stretched his leg tentatively, wincing slightly at the protest of his injured muscles. _Ehhh. The sooner I get back to Konoha, the sooner I get to sleep. _Shrugging, he took off after her, struggling to match her loping pace.

"Slow down, dammit!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Leg cramping, Shikamaru grunted and landed strangely on the branch in front of him. Flailing his arms, he managed to regain his balance. His leg buckled beneath him and he was forced to sit awkwardly on the thick branch, resting. They had been traveling for almost four hours, and the strain of rigorous movement had finally worn out Shikamaru's wounded quadriceps. Grimacing, he struggled to his feet and hopped down from the tree to rest more comfortably on the ground.

Temari, just realizing what was wrong, leapt back to him and crossed her arms. Closing his eyes, Shikamaru grumbled at her and sat back, hands behind his head. When he heard no movement or protest, he opened an eye warily. Temari, just stood there, looking down at him strangely. Resigned, she shrugged and sat down beside him, close enough to make his eyebrows raise involuntarily.

"I'll let you off the hook this time. You have ten minutes, then we're leaving." 

Shikamaru nodded gratefully, before looking sideways at her.

"Why did Gaara send you to Konoha anyway? It can't have been just to strengthen relations." 

The characteristic fire left Temari's eyes, and she looked dullly up into the thick foliage.

"It's about my marriage..." Gulping suddenly, Shikamaru almost broke into a coughing fit, choking on the saliva he'd inhaled. Recovering not so gracefully with an 'Urk' like sound, he continued to stare, bug-eyed at the girl next to him. _Why do I feel like I've been punched in the stomach?_

"What's wrong, did a bug fly down your throat or something?" Searching frantically for a subject changer, Shikamaru settled on the first one that came to mind.

"Who would want to marry a scary woman like you, anyway?" _Oh, real nice. You have an elegant way with words, that you do, Shikamaru._

Glaring, Temari punched him in the arm, snarling.

"I'll have you know that guys are lined up halfway across Suna trying to woo me." Her gaze dropped and she rubbed her arm sheepishly, like she'd been the one struck.

"It just so happens that they're all chauvinistic, greedy, old guys. Or sexual predators." 

Shikamaru snorted, but he made sure to soften his tone when he spoke.

"That sounds like a great selection. So who's the lucky– errr _unlucky_ guy?" Temari's eyes shot up, and she looked half angry, half bewildered at his comment. Searching his befuddled eyes for answers, she murmured her response.

"That's why I'm here. I haven't picked anyone, and the suitors are getting... antsy. One started to stalk me, and wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. So, here I am on a 'vacation.'" 

Shikamaru had to look away to hide his sigh of relief and compose himself. When the blush had faded from his face, Shikamaru turned back. Startled, his heart began to beat even quicker. _Did she get closer? _Doing his best to keep his voice steady, the shinobi felt Temari's warmth against his arm and leg, causing an electric tingling to travel down his spine, hairs on the back of his neck standing up. Gulping nervously, Shikamaru felt all his wits escape him. Panicking at the numbness filling his head, he searched for any sort of distraction, and settled on clearing his throat.

"Sooooo... ummm... err?"

Temari's face flushed, as their hands brushed up against each other, and they locked eyes nervously. Neither knew exactly what was supposed to happen next. Her aquamarine eyes remained focused on his ochre orbs, and Shikamaru felt a dumb sort of transfixion, unable to look away. He was dimly aware that his mouth was still agape, groping stupidly for something... _anything _to say. The only thing on his mind had four spiky pigtails and was extremely dangerous.

Temari, seeming to gain some confidence in the fact that he hadn't pulled away, relaxed a little bit and smirked slightly at him.

"What's wrong? You look like you've blown a fuse, or something..." 

Normally, Shikamaru might have completely shut down, going into a completely unresponsive catatonic state. Instead, something coursed through his veins, and he felt his brain begin to whir again, exiting standby mode. Gritting his teeth, he shook the vacant expression from his face. _A man can't let a woman have the upper hand at a time like this. _Smirking back at her, he cupped her soft cheek and gently rested his thumb against her lips.

"Shut up."

Their roles were reversed, and now Temari was the one taken aback, eyes wide in silent shock. She certainly was not used to Shikamaru acting anything like this. But for some reason, she didn't seem to mind. Her eyes never left his as she shifted her voluptuous body slightly, turning so she could face him more easily.

Taking his digit away from her lips, he ran it through her sandy hair gently. Before he could convince himself not to, he scooped her into his lap, so that her tan legs were both lying in one direction and her shoulder was resting against his chest. Shikamaru heard a sharp inhalation of breath and, closing his eyes, held back a flinch. _It's troublesome, but I'm not going to run away. Even if she beats the crap out of me..._

When he opened his eyes, he was startled to find two circles of turquoise flecked with gold and orange only about six inches away. Leaning her forehead against his, she put a hand on either of his shoulders, stabilizing herself.

"You're in a rush. I don't think I've ever seen you so motivated. I would've expected you to fall asleep at a time like this... And anyways, what makes you think I feel any different about you than I do about the hundreds of guys back in Suna?" 

A slow smirk spread across Shikamaru's face and he scratched the back of his head, feigning deep contemplation.

"Well, you haven't clobbered me yet. I guess I took that for a pretty good sign." Sighing, he threw put both arms behind his head and stretched. He looked sideways at her at winked. "But you know, you're right. We shouldn't be doing this, we have a long way to go, and we should be traveling, hmm?" 

A frown manifested itself on Temari's face as he shifted his weight, trying to squirm out from underneath her. Shikamaru couldn't help but laugh at the small growl she gave him. He settled back against the tree and stared expectantly up at her, raising his eyebrows and smiling slightly, basking in the victory. Finally, her eyes disappeared behind her sandy bangs as she lowered her head in concession. Looking into his eyes, she shook her head and muttered.

"Shikamaru Nara, you are a hopeless case. You're quite possibly the laziest and most lethargic person I have ever met." She rolled her eyes, but did not make any move to get off him. Shikamaru offered her a rare grin, too overwhelmed by the situation to maintain his usual bored expression.

"Well you're scary as hell. Doesn't everybody have their quirks? It's what makes people interesting…" She smirked again and inched forwards, cocking her head to the side. The sun blazed high above them, noon rays reflecting off of Temari's hair and bronzed skin, making them glow in radiance. She relaxed against him and spoke quietly, whispering in his ear. 

"That's a good answer." Shikamaru gulped slightly, suddenly feeling his nerves starting to kick in again. He watched her lips purse slightly, and drank in her smoky scent. _Screw it. I want this to happen._

Closing his eyes, he leaned forward, heart thumping in his ears.

His eyes snapped open at the sound of a dull thwack. Recoiling involuntarily, he found himself face to trunk with a large stump, arms snaked around its "waist" and "back", lips only inches away from a hole oozing pill bugs and sap. Shikamaru scratched his head in bewilderment for a moment, before noticing the glinting spike that had penetrated the wood, halting a few centimeters from his stomach. 

Scrambling up, he launched himself nimbly to the side, into the cover of some bushes, hearing the hiss of several more spikes as they whizzed by where his head had been. Shikamaru grunted in pain as he landed ungracefully on his bad leg, collapsing awkwardly down on one knee.

Ignoring the discomfort, the Shadow nin formed his kagemane seal, scanning the wooded surroundings for Temari and their assailant. 

A small chakra signature flickered, perched on a branch far above them, but Shikamaru knew that this person was not the man who'd attacked. _Probably just another of those troublesome bozos from last night. People never learn. _Dismissing the low level ninja, Shikamaru continued surveying his surroundings.His eyes widened as he felt a familiar chakra signature.

_Can't be... If he didn't bleed out, I split his leg nearly in half... He'd be a cripple even with the best of medical attention. _Temari landed gracefully in front of him, back to him, iron fan spread wide in a defensive position. She seemed to have come to the same conclusion about their attacker as he had, seconds earlier. 

"I thought you _dealt_ with this guy." She remarked with subdued frustration at the interruption. 

"So did I. There's another chakra signature up in the trees, but I think it's just one of the goons.

She looked back at him in apprehensive contemplation for a moment, a troubled expression on her face. Shikamaru saw her eyes dart to his injured leg and started to protest.

"Temari, I'm fi–"

"No, no you're not." 

"A man can't just hide behind a woman." He crossed his arms in defiance, while fire burned in her eyes.

"Cut the chauvinistic crap, you boneheaded baka!" 

Their little tiff was interrupted by a roar of hatred. Standing a few yards away, Kaizuketsu made for an imposing sight, hulking body ending in an outstretched finger, pointing directly at Shikamaru. Disturbed, Shikamaru felt his blood chill as he noticed the foam at the corners of the man's mouth and the absence of color in Kaizuketsu's eyes. The fiery irises were gone completely, replaced instead by an unpleasant bloodshot white, making him seem like less of a human and more of a beast.

The metal wielder struggled to construct a sentence, trying different syllables futilely, before giving up. Shaking his head wildly back and forth, Kaizuketsu let out a guttural snarl before charging blindly forward, hundreds of small metal balls hurtling alongside him, tearing through branches, sending showers of splintered wood raining down on the forest floor.

Shikamaru's yell was drowned out by a powerful gust of wind, as Temari brought her fan crashing down into the ground. Immediately his vision was obscured by a cloud of dust, small blades of chakra coursing randomly through it. _I didn't know she could do that... _

Kaizuketsu's chakra signature ceased it's advancement and he backed away involuntarily. Frozen in his spot, Shikamaru was in such awe of the giant wall of dust that he might have not moved at all if a slender hand had not gripped him by the wrist and tugged him desperately away.

When they were far enough away that they could actually see each other, Shikamaru raised his eyebrows in appreciation. Temari dusted herself and started to say something, when an earthshaking bellow rang out and a section of the wall disappeared. _This is bad... _

Temari looked torn for a moment before running through a series of hand signs Shikamaru did not recognize. Immediately, her fan began to levitate, rising slowly but surely off the ground until it hovered around hip level. Checking to make sure the few belongings she carried on her person were secured, Temari gracefully boarded the fan, sitting cross legged across the narrower edge, near the handle. She looked very embarrassed as she motioned to the space behind her urgently.

"Hold on to me tight. I don't need to tell you what will happen if you fall off this thing when we're 500 feet up in the air."

Shikamaru's eyes bugged out as he realized what she was thinking. _She's joking right? Humans are NOT supposed to fly... _However, he made his decision when the sound of heavy footsteps reached his ears. Grimacing, he clumsily mounted the iron weapon and put his arms around Temari's waist. 

Blushing furiously, Temari shut her eyes, and the fan began to rise, giving Shikamaru a sick feeling in his stomach as the ground grew farther and farther away beneath them. Daring a glance down, he saw Kaizuketsu staring in awe up at them, a thin man beside him. For a moment the fan dipped violently and Shikamaru saw his life flash before his eyes as Kaizuketsu tried to manipulate the metal. Then, with one last tug of resistance, they were out of his range and safe. _Well, relatively safe... That ground looks hard and sharp... _

Daring another glance down, Shikamaru's eyes rolled back into his head and he gave out a small groan. Temari, apparently forgetting the awkwardness of the situation, was completely at ease with her surroundings, and glanced back at him grinning. 

"Don't tell me you're afraid of heights..." Shikamaru, whose face was a particularly interesting shade of green, looked at her, rife with misery.

"Apparently I am..." He paused for a moment before groaning loudly in exasperation. Wait a minute... Did we just lose all of our baggage?" Temari nodded. "My mother is going to skin me alive..." 

XXXXXXX

Finally, after several hours of gut wrenching flight, Konoha came into view, the highest towers visible on the horizon. Loosening his grip on Temari, Shikamaru exhaled deeply and wiped his sweaty palms against his shirt. 

"Why didn't you just fly us here in the first place?" Temari answered bluntly.

"It uses a lot of chakra, I'll probably have to sleep for a couple days to get it back.:

"Psh... Sure. WHOA! I'm sorry!" Shikamaru yelled a the top of his lungs and closed his eyes as Temari executed a barrel roll, turning them upside down for a long second of terror. When she finally righted the fan, the sand kunoichi was whooping with laughter, while Shikamaru remained silent and pale. When he did find words, he only muttered.

"Never do that again."

XXXXXXXXXXXX

**A/N: Sort of a jumbled chapter. A lot happened and it might have been kind of jumpy. I'm sorry it's so late, but I had a lot going on with the parental units. Next Update: Sooner than this one (maybe).**


	15. Thank god your mother wasn't here

A/N: I suck

**A/N: I suck. It's as plain as that. Never once did I think about discontinuing this story, I just couldn't get myself to get off my figurative ass, get my literal ass in my computer chair, and continue working on it. Granted, I was busy for a while, but that's a poor excuse. I am so sorry, and I'd like to greatly thank all of you who have stuck with me on this.**

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Gritting his fanged teeth and clutching his twitching muscles, Kaizuketsu sank to his knees, screaming in agony as his skin seared. With great effort, he turned his head towards Sugekei, brimming with hatred. _I... can't control... my body..._

"What the hell did you DO to me?!

Sugekei only chuckled. He was not in the least perturbed by his quarry's escape. Time was not an issue. Drawing closer to the writhing ninja, Sugekei spread the long fingers of his right hand and siezed Kaizuketsu's head, speaking in a silky, venemous tone.

"I just need to make sure you keep your end of the bargain. As you get a feel for it, you will see my gift as more of a contribution than a set back. Now sleep."

With a snap of his fingers, the iron ninja's form went limp, collapsing into an unconscious heap. Raising his head towards the Noon sky, Sugekei smiled, sharp teeth gleaming through the mouthole on his mask.

"I'm coming, my exotic desert flower. Soon you will be all mine."

XXXXXXXXXX

Temari grinned toothily from her perch on the fan. Flying on her fan took a lot of chakra out of her, but she didn't know of any better feeling than the weightlessness of soaring. Taking a glance back, she frowned slightly when she noticed Shikamaru's face was still a shade of green. _I swear, if he hurls on my fan, there will be HELL to pay._

A cry of shock and wonder rang out, far below them, as guards manning Konoha's walls caught sight of them. Glancing down, Temari waved at the men, taking great pride in the way their jaws dropped at the sight of her and Shikamaru. Before the guards could react, in a hostile or any other kind of manner, the floating fan had passed them, setting down on the roof of the hospital_._

Hopping off the fan, which still hung about two feet in the air, Temari stretched her arms and legs, before fixing her windblown hair.

"Well lazy, that wasn't so bad was it?... Shikamaru?"

Surprised by the absence of a witty retort, Temari turned to see Shikamaru swaying dangerously. At last, he lost all balance and lurched forward, smacking his forehead against the concrete before she could catch him. Wincing for him, Temari knelt by his side and rolled him over gently. His eyes were blurry and unfocused, but his collision with the ground seemed to not have caused any damage. Poking him in the ribs, Temari called his name. No response.

"Are you all right?"

"Unnnnnn..."

Temari rolled her eyes as she hoisted him to his feet. His knees buckled and he sagged, like a wet noodle. Temari glared at him and cried out in exasperation.

"You're not going to make me carry, are you?"

With this, a little bit of light returned to Shikamaru's eyes, and he made the effort to stand on his own. His speech was slurred and slow, but he seemed to be forming coherent thoughts.

"A-A man ca-can't let himshelf be carried anywhere by-by... by" Temari sighed and slung his arm around her shoulder, helping him towards the doorway.

"–By a woman. Yeah, sure. Now save your strength for shambling down stairs. I don't know how many floors of storage space this building has, but we'll need to get you down to the nearest doctor."

"Fifteen." Shikamaru groggily muttered, an exasperated grimace on his face.

"Hm?"

"I shaid, thish building hash fifteen floorsh of shtorage zzzzzzzz."

Finishing his sentence, Shikamaru zonked out, turning into a deadweight in her arms. Struggling to keep his limp form from collapsing, Temari glared in stubborn determination at the door in front of her from beneath her sandy bangs. Her body already exhausted from Chakra use, she felt her limbs begin to shake, before steeling herself and taking a step forwards.

"Damned lazy ass. Fifteen floors it is."

XXXXXXXXX

With an agonized scream the leaf ninja collapsed in a writhing mass of shattered bones and pulverized flesh, clutching the stump of what had been his right arm. To his left was a pulp that had once been one of his teammates, blood seeping from the puddle of gore, skin, and uniform. Staring in silent terror at the monstrosity in front of him, Jiro could only watch as _it_ dismembered his other teammate, laughing brutally as it flung limbs in every direction, before tearing into the torso of the still screaming man. Already, everything seemed blurry and undefined to the dying man. He tried to crawl backwards as the beast approached him, sniffing the air and howling in a mixture of agony and ecstasy. Mouthing a silent prayer to Kami, Jiro closed his eyes as claws descended upon him, ending it all in one ghastly slash, bashing in his head while separating it from his neck.

XXXXXXXXX

Kaizuketsu took one look at the bloody mess all around him and sank to his knees. As his senses and bodily control slowly returned to him, he became aware of the metallic taste in his mouth, as well as the gore that was splattered across his black uniform. Retching, Kaizuketsu screeched with mounting nausea as he felt several pungent chunks of human flesh come loose from between his teeth. With one great bellow, the iron ninja threw up, spewing the contents of his stomach all over the serene forest ground. His furnace-orange eyes dulled and resignation set in. _How can everything be so damn peaceful?_

Staring down at his crimson fingers, Kaizuketsu saw curved claws receding back into the skin. Gripping his head and curling up into a fetal position, he squeezed his eyes shut, willing the last few days' events to dissappear. _Monster. You are a monster. _A laugh came from the canopy above him, as Sugekei seemed to float down, gliding gracefully. Laughter trailing off, the thin man crouched beside Kaizuketsu.

"You'll get used to the taste, I promise."

XXXXXXXXX

Kankurou halted and turned back towards his brother, who had just stopped. The puppeteer waited for an explanation, before quickly growing impatient as Gaara just stood there, unreadable eyes contemplating something.

"Oy! Gaara! What gives?" Gaara hesitated a moment before catching up to, and then passing his brother.

"It's nothing. Don't worry about it." Kankuro accepted this answer and quickened the pace, grinning devilishly. Pulling out an orange covered book, he flipped to a marked page and grinned even wider. After discovering the written works of Jiraiya, Kankuro's reluctance towards visiting Konoha had abruptly died, replaced with a ravenous lusting for as many exotic, Konoha girls as possible.

"Whatever you say. I just want to get to the hot springs this Jiraiya guy keeps writing about. Hey, in his author's bio, he talks about this sex position where the girl..." Gaara wrinkled his nose in distaste as he tuned out Kankuro, thinking instead of the scent he'd caught a whiff of on the wind; a smell that closely resembled the taste he knew so very well from his days as a monster. Human blood.

XXXXXXXXX

Sunlight danced lazily across Temari's face as she lay in the hospital bed. Murmuring softly, she rolled over and forced herself to sit up, stretching her tired muscles. Rubbing her eyes and moaning softly, Temari noticed with annoyance that the hospital staff had undressed her down to her undergarments and covered them only with a one sided hospital gown._ I'm going to find the perverted, pimply-faced intern that did that and rip his head off. _Forcing herself to calm down, Temari percieved with surprise a clean set of her clothes resting on a rather uncomfortable looking mauve chair to her left.

Flinging back the encumbering covers, tossing the aggravating hospital gown into a cluttered pile in the corner, and climbing stiffly out of bed, Temari was about to reach for the outfit when she became aware of steady breathing to her right. Whirling about, Temari involuntarily let out a sort of strangled yelp when she saw Shikamaru's sleeping form, sprawled uncomfortably on a short sofa set up for visitors. Realization crashed over her again as she found herself rather scantily clad. Covering her mouth in horror Temari closed her eyes and prayed to any deity that would take pity on her. _Don't wake up, don't wake up. PLEASE, don't wake up. _

While Temari was frozen in apprehension, Shikamaru began to stir, yawning and blinking sleepily. Brain still not completely functional, he caught sight of her and smiled non-chalantly.

"Do you have any idea how long you've been out for?"

He frowned when her only response was to make an 'urk' type sound. Soon, however, his eyes widened, and his breath caught in his throat.

All intelligence drained from his normally keen orbs for a few moments. His hormones ran rampant as she merely stood there in front of him. The uncharacteristic confused, vulnerable look on her face. The way the sun glinted off the abundance of her exposed, bronzed skin. The way that Temari didn't need any sort of push-up bra or lingerie to accent her stunning figure. All of these things brought Shikamaru's heart rate up, until he felt it pounding in his throat, making it impossible for him to swallow.

By the time Temari had at last regained control of her body, Shikamaru had stopped shaking and was more or less composed, examining a_ fascinating _fly buzzing frantically against the barrier of a window pane. Temari urgently dove back under the covers of her bed and did her best to appear unaffected. When she spoke, she was grateful to hear her tone was its usual confident self.

"Relax, I'm not going to hit you or anything."

Shikamaru breathed a sigh of relief. Rubbing the back of his neck and looking sheepish, he muttered in his one of a kind drawl:

"You women have no idea what you do to poor men like me. Troublesome doesn't even begin to describe it." The last lingering bits of embarassment began to fade, and Temari found herself rolling her eyes.

"I think it would be best if we both just forgot about this incident." He raised his eyebrows and smiled thinly up at the ceiling.

"Fair enough." Temari, sat up and propped herself up against her pillow, holding up the covers as a buffer zone between her and Shikamaru. Running a hand through her hair, she nodded towards Shikamaru.

"Well?" He cocked an eyebrow in the baffled befuddlement characteristic to people who have just woken up.

"Well what?" All of a sudden Temari felt a little bit cranky.

"The poison? What was it? Are you just peachy, or are you going to bite off your tongue while puking gray bile, babble delirous gibberish, then die an agonizing death? What do you mean 'well what?!'" Temari snapped back at him. Shikamaru looked at her and smiled his signature crooked smirk.

"I didn't know you were _that_ worried... Are you sure you care–" Holding up his hands to shield himself, Shikamaru deflected the sandal that had been on a collision course with his forehead.

"All right! Damn. Women have no sense of humor." Grumbling to himself, Shikamaru lazily tossed the shoe back, making sure to place it just out Temari's reach, depriving her of further ammunition.

"The poison was called Arainu, created by military scientists in Kumogakure. By attacking the centers of the brain responsible for self control, it essentially turns an opposing ninja into a walking time bomb, capable of blowing up in a fit of violent rage at the slightest of insult. Aside from that, the side effects are much like being drunk. The victim works up the courage to engage in actions he or she wouldn't normally perform. Drowsiness and random blackouts were also recorded among test subjects. Luckily for Konoha, it was only used in the waning moments of the great war, or else there might have been a much different outcome. The Land of Lightning agreed to outlaw it's use and production as part of the terms of the peace treaty."

Temari sighed in relief, surprised to find that she hadn't been breathing for most of his explanation. Raising his thin eyebrows slightly, and yawning, Shikamaru slothfully waved a hand in the general direction of his family estates.

"Fortunately for me, the third Hokage never truly trusted the Raikage. So he assigned the task of finding an antidote and producing it to my Dad. You've noticed all those deer around the house? Most of them are not for venison. We mix the antlers our deer shed with different herbs to come up with lots of different antidotes. Besides our shadow kekkai genkais, the Nara clan also has a gift for concocting different medicines."

Blowing a few loose strands of sandy hair out of her face, Temari lay back, resting her hands behind her head.

"Don't forget your uncanny ability to piss off women like me at every given opportunity."

He rolled his eyes and rose creakily, before lazily making his winding way to her bedside. Temari felt her heart begin to flutter as he grew nearer. He hesitated for a moment, and it occured to her that he might lie down on the bed beside her. Her inner self smiled dryly. _'Like you'd mind...'_

Instead, Shikamaru leaned against the wall about foot to the left of her. Closing his eyes and shoving his hands deep down into his pockets, Shikamaru didn't notice the wolflike smile that slowly spread across Temari's face. _Should I, or shouldn't I?_

"Truth be told, that's not all that hard. You're kind of the Royal Queen of PMS. Moodswings galore, overflowing with passion. You go from wratfhul to compassionate in under 3.4 seconds. Pissy to soft. Rabid-charging-rhino to... to..."

Shikamaru was so absorbed in finding the right analogy that he didn't notice the slender hand full of diabolical intent reaching for his collar. The strong fingers discreetly grasped the shirt fabric in a vicelike grip. With a startled yelp, he found himself dragged down into the fluffy recesses of the bed. Keeping the covers between them, Temari rolled herself on top of him, straddling him, keeping a forearm across his chest to lock him in place. It was the same image as by the river those few nights ago, only their roles were reversed. Looking up at her with a surprisingly calm look, Shikamaru finished his sentence.

"To this." Temari gave him a predatory smile.

"No one, _no one,_ calls me a rhino and gets away with it. Now you'll have to deal with the consequences."

Crouching over her prey, Temari moved her hands to his shoulders and leaned forward. Warm, minty breath caused her to tingle pleasantly as she inched forwards. _Finally. I never realized how much I've been... looking forward to this... _Her lips were only a few centimeters from his when he jerked away, turning his head to the side and away from her, an expression of disgust on his face.

Surprised, angry, and dissappointed, Temari released him and sat up, rubbing the back of her head furiously, hoping against all hope to wake up in a cold sweat to find this rejection all a nightmare. _But it's not._ Thinking back to their situation before Kaizuketsu's second attack, Temari could only wonder.

Forcing the bitter knot in her stomach to dissipate, she looked at him, and disguising the hurt she felt, muttered in as even a tone as she could muster. Even so, a slight hint of pleading incredulity lagged at the end of each of her sentences, begging him to interrupt her and say he'd swallowed a bug or had a mini-siezure.

"I got carried away... I know that you, of all people, couldn't feel that way about me... I... don't know what happened..."

_Yes you do, you stupid cow. You're too damn aggressive. All men want a stupid damsel in distress to let them sweep her of her feet. They need to feel empowered, macho, manly. He's no different... I thought he might be, but he's not..._

Pulling the already untucked covers about herself, she wrapped them in a protective cocoon around her body and turned, anxious to escape the embarassment. She was trying to figure out exactly where she was going to escape _to,_ when she felt a gentle hand rest tentatively on her shoulder. Spinning slowly in surprise, she was met by a soft pair of lips and chocolate eyes.

His hands moved tantalizingly around to her back and under the covers resting on her exposed shoulder blades, gently squeezing them. Temari didn't move until a wave of butterflies in her stomach melted her frozen shock. Finally, Shikamaru released her and smirked lazily at the sand kunoichi's bewildered look. She opened and closed her mouth a couple times before finally managing to form the simple word 'what.' He shrugged and tried to maintain a bored look.

"Everyone knows that the man has to make the first move in a relationship, otherwise it's simply not proper."

Temari's jaw dropped, and she stared at him for a moment, absorbing what he'd just said. Relief and white-hot fury coursed through her. _Oh. My. Kami. You're going to get it now. _Even as she prepared to bite his head off, Temari couldn't help but feel a rather... _pleasant_ sort of rage.

"WHAT?! You stupid chauvinist pig! Do you have any idea how I just felt a minute ago? You're simply clueless as to how my mind works, aren't you?"

Shikamaru's smug look turned to painful shock as Temari sucker punched him in the stomach. Falling backwards onto the soft cushion of the mattress, Shikamaru's poor body was assailed vigorously by punches and kisses, scratches and gropes, slaps and squeezes. To match this, the fiery woman on top of him alternated between screaming her head off at him and tongue wrestling him for supremacy.

Overcoming the initial pain and surprise, Shikamaru put a hand on her exposed thigh and rolled her over, claiming the dominant position with an unexpected display of strength and willpower. As Shikamaru tried to toss the covers that separated them to the floor without taking his lips from hers, Temari fumbled with the zipper on his shirt. Their efforts were interrupted by the sound of the door to the hall opening.

Both of them froze and turned their heads to the doorway, Temari's front teeth still clamped around Shikamaru's lower lip. Three figures loomed in the doorway. On the left, a cat-eared hoodie, in the center a mess of bright red hair, and on the left a spiked pineapple hairstyle much like Shikamaru's. Each face held a different expression. Kankuro was fuming, one eye twitching, with his fists clenched and sleeves rolled up. Gaara seemed impassive, but there was a small glint of surprise in his eyes, as will as the hint of a smile on his face. Shikaku meanwhile was grinning from ear to ear and shaking his head from side to side. Kankuro was the first to speak, raising his voice in harsh anger while stepping menacingly forward.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing with my sister, Nara? I don't care if you just recovered from being poisoned, I am going to kick your ass all the way to hell and back."

Kankuro might have moved to make good on his promise if Gaara's hand had not extended to his shoulder and tugged him back into the hall. Dragging Kankuro's cussing and spitting form away, Gaara nodded to Temari. _He's taking this surprisingly well... Kankuro on the other hand... well, what with all the gold diggers he brings home, I don't think I'll feel too guilty..._

"Temari, don't do anything you might regret. Send for me once you leave the hospital, we have some matters to discuss over dinner."

Temari's eyebrows furrowed in anxiety as she had a gut wrenching feeling. _He's not still going to sellf me off to one of those pigs is he? _Siezing Shikamaru by the shoulders and leaning her head against his chest, Temari shoved away all the troublesome thoughts, and chose to live in the moment. Shikamaru cleared his throat, causing her to look up into the eyes of his father. Shikaku was leaning against the doorway, looking triumphantly and proudly at his son.

"What did I say about strong women, Shikamaru? See? It runs in the family. I'm proud of you son, but remember our talk about cond–" Face on fire, Shikamaru threw up his hands and spoke in an exasperated tone.

"For Kami's sake, Dad! I remember the talk, so there's no need to repeat anything. Besides, we didn't do anything like that." Temari smiled slyly to herself. _...yet. _Shikaku put up his hands in an appeasing manner and backed into the hallway.

"Whatever you say, Shikamaru. Just be glad your mother wasn't here to see the show..."

XXXXXXXXXXX

**A/N: Well, the big romance chapter. But it seems that there's always someone to interrupt them, eh? Hope you liked it, and I will get my butt back into fic-writing gear.**


	16. Twin Encounters

A/N: 'Two weeks in the wilderness without a computer' is all I can say

**A/N: 'Two weeks in the wilderness without a computer' is all I can say. I'll try to get out a chapter a week for any week I'm home, but I have some volunteer work and a couple trips coming up, so I don't know how much free time I will have. Half way through this chapter, it might seem like this fic is taking a turn towards harem, but it's not, so never you fret, young 'uns.**

XXX Five days later XXX

Shikamaru sat at the kitchen table, staring distractedly out the kitchen window, a hint of a smile on his face. Oblivious to her son's new involvement with Temari, Yoshino was washing dishes, entertaining herself by blathering away about all the injustices of being a mother to a slacker, being sure to mix in an occasional remonstrance for Shikamaru's carelessness and lack of motivation to improve his skills. Shikamaru didn't hear a word of it.

The last few days had been like nothing he'd ever experienced. While Kankuro's omnipresence and threatening gestures, coupled with Gaara's frequent lunch appointments, had allowed very little alone time for Temari and Shikamaru, the time they had shared had been pleasant, to say the least. Having a girl...friend, (the word was still foreign to Shikamaru's tongue), albeit a secret one, was certainly troublesome, but Shikamaru had no doubt that the benefits far outweighed the drawbacks.

Looking off into space, Shikamaru contentedly leaned back in the elm chair, causing it to groan in protest. Springing like a steel trap on a cheese addicted mouse lacking discretion, Yoshino was in her son's face in an instant, eyes sharp with annoyance.

"Shikamaru! When someone is talking to you, it's polite to at least _listen, _if not respond as well." Massaging her temples, Yoshino collapsed wearily into the seat across from Shikamaru.

"What does a woman have to do to get some help, you knucklehead? I'm starting to think two of our stags would be more useful around the house than you and your father... Speaking of which, one of your does is sick. I want you to take some medicine out to her and check for any predators in the East pasture while you're at it. Ah! No complaints bub, I don't care if you just got out of the hospital–"

Yoshino's ears pricked and she glared in suspicion at her taciturn child. Immediately, Shikamaru regretted the absence of a complaint as his mother scrutinized him.

"You're not whining... What's put you in such a good mood?" Shikamaru rose hastily and swiped the medicine container from its place on the kitchen counter. Heading for the door as quickly as possible without drawing more suspicion, Shikamaru mumbled over his shoulder.

"Must be the aftereffects of the poison. Now shush, troublesome woman, I'm doing it."

"I told you not to call me that! Show some respect for once!" The hurled salt shaker missed its target's spiky haired head by a fraction of an inch as he ducked out the doorway in a hurry.

One hand wrapped around the pill container, the other thrust deep in his pocket, Shikamaru jogged down the stairs of his front porch, intent on escaping his home and any other projectiles. He was about to hop the fence leading to the deer pastures when he caught sight of a figure with golden hair out of the corner of his eye. His heart lurched unexpectedly as he turned to face Temari. _I thought she was out eating again with Gaara._

Instead of Temari, Ino was leaning against a tree, wearing one of her more expensive outfits and looking at him with just a hint of disapproval. Slightly disappointed, Shikamaru raised his eyebrows at her and paused, awaiting an explanation for her presence. Shikamaru's nonchalance turned to confused alarm when Ino approached him with a saunter, swinging her hips in a sensual (or at least what she thought of as sensual) way. Despite this, Shikamaru sensed that under the surface, there was a storm brewing in Ino.

As she came closer, he unconsciously took several steps backwards, until he felt the hard oak railing halt his retreat. She stopped her advance a couple of feet from him and frowned up at him, hands on her hips. She spoke in a hiss of a whisper, so as to avoid alerting Yoshino.

"Is it true that you've gotten yourself involved with Temari of the Sand? _Her _of all people?!" Ino crossed her arms and waited for a coherent response, while Shikamaru flushed and stuttered inaudibly. At last he composed himself and admitted defeat.

"Who told you that, anyways?" Ino stiffened before relaxing and moving closer to him (much to Shikamaru's dismay).

"I have my sources. But tell me Shikamaru, don't you think you could do much better than that Sunagakure skank? For instance, how long have _we _known each other, hmm? The sex can't be that great with Temari." Shikamaru felt himself grow angry and very, very tired at the same time. Distancing himself from his friend, Shikamaru nimbly hopped the dilapidated fence and began walking through the pastures, Ino following close behind. Exasperated, Shikamaru called over his shoulder, attempting to get rid of Ino.

"First off, Temari and I HAVEN'T had sex, so your 'source' is full of it. Secondly, don't even pretend that we have ever had anything remotely close to romantic feelings. There was a time when I would have taken you up on your offer, but you were too busy chasing Sasuke, or whoever was the hunksicle 'flavor of the month.'"

Shikamaru realized with a start that he had been shouting and wondered to himself: _How long have I had these feelings pent up? _Turning around to face the blonde, Shikamaru calmed himself and spoke in a softer tone.

"Look, Ino. You're one of my best friends, and I would like for it to stay that way, but I've learned something about you through careful observation and analysis. You see, you only _want _what you _can't_ have. If I were single, you'd have absolutely zero interest in me. Or I'd turn into one of your short lived week-long-bonanza boyfriends. I'm the first one to admit that I'm not particularly great, but for some insane, unfathomable reason... Temari likes me, and I– I like her."

Ino had gradually turned a plum color throughout the duration of Shikamaru's speech, but instead of shouting, she looked down sadly. Ino was a master at faking all sorts of feelings, but what Shikamaru saw was raw, honest pain and guilt. She sighed and dropped her arms to her side, glumly examining every speck of dirt on the ground beneath her.

"You're right, Shika. I don't know what happens, but I'm just... never happy. Every guy I meet is great... for about a week. Then I get tired of him, like, I get the feeling that he's not the right one; like I've yet to meet my true love. Like there's someone... _better..._ I haven't met yet. Is it stupid to believe in true love?" Shikamaru smiled slightly at her and shook his head.

"I'm sure as hell not an expert on infatuation, lust, and love, but I don't think it is. 'True love' might be asking a little... much from someone our age, but there's nothing wrong with trying to find your soul mate. If such a thing exists, that is." A slow, sly smile spread across Shikamaru's face and he resumed his characteristic slouch, looking sideways.

"You know... I think that you might have a slight edge on all the other girls trying to find their true love. There's someone you might want to try. I think he deserves some of your attention." Curiosity became apparent on Ino's face and she cocked her head to the side, frowning in speculation.

"Who...?" Shikamaru took a deep breath and weighed the effects of his actions. _What the hell. Chouji deserves attention._

"Haven't you noticed how Chouji is always there when you need him? He's always looking out for you in fights, always willing to accompany you on your shopping rampages, and usually the one who ends up paying for said shopping ventures."

Ino looked like she'd been struck by lightning, (minus the whole smoldering corpse part.) Putting one hand out to steady herself, the other to her head, she whispered to herself for a few seconds, before saying a quick thanks to Shikamaru and hurrying back the way she had come. Shikamaru merely smirked at her.

After Ino was out of his sight, Shikamaru continued on into the pasture, lazily tossing the pill bottle up in the air and catching it deftly. When he reached his destination, Shikamaru closed his eyes and began scanning the chakra readings of the deer. When at last he found the afflicted doe, Shikamaru crooned to it to keep it from bolting, while extending his hand, its palm containing the grass flavored pills.

The skittish animal sniffed hesitantly for a few seconds before tentatively scooping one of the brown tablets onto its tongue and into its mouth. Sensing food being eaten without them, two fawns butted their heads against their mother's flank, yearning for attention or some of the mystery food.

After finding the taste satisfactory, the doe gave a contented sigh and nodded approvingly to Shikamaru, before snorting at her fawns and ambling off, back into the ranks of the herd. Shikamaru yawned, before lying spread-eagle in the grass, staring up into the sky. He knew that the sooner he returned to the house, the sooner his mother would assign some other bothersome chore to him. _Meh. My sin is definitely sloth. _

Feeling the heat of the blazing summer sun on his skin, Shikamaru groaned and stretched, laying an arm across his face to shield himself from the light. The sticky warmth, combined with his own sleepy nature, overwhelmed Shikamaru, and he dozed off, snoring softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Shikamaru's peaceful slumber was broken as he felt a set of strong teeth tug at his coarse hair, causing a ripple of pain to spread across his scalp. Cursing under his breath, Shikamaru sat up and looked around in annoyance for the deer that had woken him. His aggravation faded, replaced by curiosity, as he found that all of the deer in the herd, from the smallest fawn to the largest, most dominant stag were staring intently off into the distance, necks stiff and chestnut ears pricked in rigid attention.

Rising to a sitting position, Shikamaru blinked and tried to bring his eyes into focus, shielding his gaze from the sun's radiance. Still unable to see what it was that had the deer so perplexed, Shikamaru creakily got to his feet, groaning at the effort. At last, through the blinding light of the mid afternoon sun, a figure became apparent. It was so thin that at first Shikamaru thought, scratching his head in curiosity, that Ino had returned, and wondered how her confrontation with Chouji had gone.

But, as the person – surely a man now, for he had to be almost six and a half feet tall – grew closer, Shikamaru could tell it was someone he had never encountered before. At least someone he hadn't encountered face to face.

Shikamaru frowned in puzzlement and was about to call out when he noticed a strange change among the deer. Where they had previously been merely attentive, fear began to spread through the ranks of the herd. Frightened huffs and clicks sounded through the congregation of animals, and one by one they bolted over the grassy hill and out of sight. Shikamaru, now wary, grit his teeth and pulled a kunai discreetly from his weapons pouch, keeping that hand clenched in a fist behind his back. _I guess the deer were trying to warn me._

The man that approached walked with a confident, at the same time _delicate_, swagger, stepping disdainfully around the abundance of deer turds splayed across the grassy knolls in steaming mounds. Indeed, he was just as thin as – or perhaps thinner than – Ino; his limbs resembled the branches of a deciduous tree stripped bare by the fierce chill of winter.

His face was covered by a mask, but Shikamaru could tell he was no ANBU member. The mask, depicting some sort of laughing demon, was a deep crimson color, accented by ivory teeth and horns. On part of the mask, the paint had been allowed to drip, creating the illusion of streaks of blood coming down from each eye. The eye slits revealed slitted serpentine eyes, and when the man spoke, his voice was venomously soft, sweet, and melodious.

"This is the Nara compound, is it not?" Shikamaru feigned a carefree smile, but kept his distance from the stranger, preparing for the worst. Although he managed to maintain a front of easy confidence, Shikamaru felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up, and a thousand needle pricks ran up his spine. _Something isn't _right_ about this guy. I've never sensed such evil chakra before..._

"Yeah, it is. My name is Shikamaru, may I assist you in some way...?" The man laughed heartily and relaxed into a slouch not unlike Shikamaru's, halting a few yards from him.

"My name is Sugekei, and yes, there is a point to my visit." Shikamaru's eyes did not register Sugekei's movements, but the next thing he knew, the lanky creature was behind him, whispering in his ear in a snakelike hiss.

"I believe you have something, or rather, some_one_, who belongs to me, boy." Before Shikamaru had time to jump away, Sugekei formed several hand signs and wrapped his thin arm around the shorter man's neck, exhibiting great strength for his stature. Just as Shikamaru yelled out, a light blinded him, and he had the sensation of falling at a great speed. When he was finally able to open his eyes, he was sprawled face down in dirt and sharp pine needles. _Wait a second... pine needles? _

Spitting out a mouthful of sow bugs and the local fauna, he rose, and found himself in completely different surroundings. Shikamaru was back in the forest surrounding Konoha; he had no idea exactly where. For a brief moment he dared to hope that Sugekei had disappeared along with the rolling pastures of the Nara estate. Then the sound of gleeful laughing reached his ears. Perched on a branch a few feet above Shikamaru's head, Sugekei sneered down at him. Somehow, the emotion managed to manifest itself on the mask, which changed from gleeful to a horrendous snarling face.

Leaping back twenty feet, Shikamaru instantly analyzed any scenery that might work to or against his advantage. _The sun is fairly low in the horizon. That will help, but I hate to go up against an opponent I know nothing about. I guess I'll have to use the element of surprise. _Carefully performing handsigns behind his back, Shikamaru stalled for time to allow his shadow to get into position.

"I assume you're one of Temari's suitors, yes?" The man nodded in confirmation. Shikamaru grinned and chuckled. "So, which are you, a chauvinistic old fart, or a sexual predator? Perhaps both?" Sugekei stiffened for a moment before letting his shoulders slump and laughed loudly, pounding his fists against the tree beside him. Shikamaru visibly winced when he saw the cracked bark and dented tree.

"Fortunately, you are nothing but a peasant worm, writhing in the filth of lower class. Your opinion doesn't matter. Tell me, _boy, _do you really think royalty like Temari-san should stoop to your level? Do you _really _think you deserve her?" Gritting his teeth, Shikamaru manipulated his shadow up the back of the tree Sugekei had landed on. _Just a little bit farther. _Sugekei again moved too fast for Shikamaru's eyes to follow. Next thing the shadow-nin knew, he was lying on his back , right cheek smarting from an open palm blow. Sugekei stood above him, mask smirking smugly down at him.

"Did you really think I'd fall for your little shadow parlor trick? You know, I saw you fight against my servant at the campsite. Your cunning and strategic prowess are remarkable, but they pale in comparison to my own. Of course, I also possess much more raw power than you could ever hope to achieve, Shikamaru. But dear me, I'm going to talk myself hoarse... Let me just finish what I came here to do..."

With a quick, surgical motion, Sugekei slashed Shikamaru across the chest with claws that had sprouted from the ends of his fingers. Blood seeped from the four parallel wounds into Sugekei's cupped palm. Shikamaru watched, stupefied as the man lapped up every drop of his blood and then belched in satisfaction. Feeling strangely calm, Shikamaru pressed a trembling hand to his own wound, felt the wetness, then matter-of-factly asked Sugekei who or what he was. Sugekei merely grunted before punching Shikamaru in the back of the head, sending the teen into a deep, peaceful slumber. Sugekei's image blurred for a moment, before changing. Looking down at the crumpled form of its mirror image, the figure grinned and flickered out of existence.

**A/N: Kinda sappy, I know. For all of you who might object to Ino's attitude this chapter, I'm sorry to stay that I stick by my character analysis. Ino is definitely not the type to fall in love with Shikamaru, but I do think that she would be the jealous type. It's already obvious that she often wants what she can't have while shunning what she does have. Still, I'm convinced that she'll come around at some point. So... Bleh. On a separate note, IWBaM's (that's my name abbreviation) word of the day is "disirregardless," a triple negative that one of my friends uses frequently. It's not a word, but it should be. :)**


	17. Identity Double

**A/N: Sorry, my parents had me tied in the basement for the last four months. That's my excuse. I am sorry to keep you people waiting, but I was distracted and stressed for the last few months. Like I said before, I have every intention of finishing this story, and even if I don't update for a while (or ages, as in this case) you shouldn't lose ALL hope. Christmas break will bring more opportunity to write, I hope, but my school only gave me two weeks off (stingy bastards). READ, PEOPLE, READ!**

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Gaara stared wearily into his sister's stubborn teal eyes. As she restlessly picked at her food, he waited patiently for an answer to his question. Nearly everyday that week, they had gone out to lunch. All of the five meals had been tense and awkward, due to the subject discussed during them: her marriage. Specifically, her marriage to a man from Suna was what was being discussed.

Gaara was still allowing her to choose her husband, but with members of the council and other nobles pressuring him constantly, he had no idea how much longer he would be able to hold out. Each of the five meals, Temari had argued vehemently, asking him why she couldn't choose her husband. None of Gaara's answers were suitable to her, and she seemed to only grow more and more furious and obstinate each day. A less patient man would have given up long ago, but Gaara knew that his sister's betrothal was very important, not only to his own power, but to the political stability of Suna.

"Temari–" His usual monotone contained a hint of pleading. "My position as Kazekage is already precarious as it is. How many people do you think feel safe having a teenager as their ruler? How many parents do you think taught their children to fear me; called me a monster; recoiled at the very sight of me? They might be hard to see, but there are enemies everywhere. We need another strong clan at our side to maintain peace and order.

"You and I both know that Kankuro's lecherous lifestyle has driven away honorable candidates for his wife, and it's not as if young women are lining up to be my wife. We need you. Suna needs you. If there were any other way. . . . As for your dating a shinobi of Konoha. . . . If word reached Suna, there would be a scandal."

Temari's fierce gaze sharpened and she rose from her chair, hissing.

"I don't care if they know. There must be a different way. You know I am devoted to Suna, but I would rather die than live a miserable life sharing a bed with one of those swine." Breathing heavily, Temari turned to leave. Gaara let her go, a pit forming in his stomach. His expression remained impassive, but inside he was torn between family loyalties and loyalty to the state. _If only there were another way..._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Temari aimlessly wandered through the city, indirectly making her way towards the Nara compound. She remained devoted to Shikamaru, but inside she was beginning to wonder if she had the right to choose love over her country. _I don't know if this is even what people call love... I know I've never felt this before, but it could be temporary. _Her internal conflict raged on as she passed by storefronts and houses. When she looked up, she found herself on the very stretch of road that Shikamaru had given her the tour of.

Looking over at a particularly familiar restaurant, Temari saw a crowd of people. _No, not people. Girls and young women. _With a start, Temari caught sight of Sasuke, and it all came back to her. _"I told you it's nothing, just where the Sasuke fan rallies usually take place. He does some kind of sick raffle to choose who's "lucky enough" to be his date." _Losing all feelings of misery, Temari let her head back and laughed heartily. Several girls turned and looked at her strangely, but they soon turned their attention back to the teen deity they were gathered around. Temari continued on her way, smiling slightly at the week old memories of her stay in Konoha. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Kankuro's black outfit and purple makeup, but she chose to ignore him and continue on her way. _If he interferes with my visit to Shikamaru this time, he won't leave with all his teeth still intact._

Passing by the local pub, Temari heard the loud, slurred voices of Shikaku, Inoichi, and Chouza, raised in sloppy unison to some nameless drinking song. _I wonder if that's what Shikamaru is going to be like in 20 years? _She grinned._ Pfft. Not if I have anything to say it. _Walking slowly with her finger thoughtfully placed over her chin, Temari didn't notice Shikamaru slouch into sight a few yards in front of her. He caught her attention when he tried to slink away unnoticed. Puzzled by his actions, Temari raised her eyebrows and cocked her head to the side.

"What are _you_ sneaking around for? I was just headed–" She stopped as she heard him mumble something. _What's wrong with him?_

"What? Speak up, boy-man-child." Raising his eyes in an uncertain manner that made Temari's stomach churn, Shikamaru met her eyes hesitantly.

"I don't want to see you anymore Temari." The sand kunoichi felt as if a hulking monstrosity of a man had hit her right between the shoulderblades with a sledgehammer. Then she laughed and socked him on the arm. _You can't fool me twice boy-o._

"Yeah, sure. I'm not falling for that again, crybaby. Now come on, let's go." She stopped dragging him and cast a look back in the direction she'd come. "We should probably bring your dad home from the bar too. I hear your mom swings a mean frying pan." Her cheerfulness faded to agitation when he kept looking at her with that melancholy face. Letting go of his hand, she started to lose her temper.

"What's your problem?" Shikamaru shrugged and continued past her, in the general direction of his abode.

"I'm sorry, but my only problem is you. Like I said before, I don't want to see you anymore. I was wrong about loving you." Temari stopped dead in her tracks, still refusing to believe that this was real.

_This can't be Shikamaru, but it's not an imitation jutsu, and the nurses said that all the poison was out of his system._

"Shikamaru, if this is an act, it _isn't _funny. Stop it." Her voice wavered a little, but she controlled it. He continued to look at her strangely, this time with his signature expression of slight annoyance.

"Listen woman, how many times do I have to say it before you'll believe me? That poison was the only thing that made me act romantically towards you. I'm sorry, but that's the all there is to it. Women like you are more trouble than they're worth."

Temari halted and rubbed her head uncertainly as Shikamaru turned his back on her and began walking home. She watched him continue steadily, even _leisurely,_ until he was out of sight, before she stopped to think.

_He talks like Shikamaru does. He has his expressions down solid. He has his memories. That IS Shikamaru, you stupid cow! _Temari stared dully at the asphalt of the street below her. She didn't feel like sobbing or yelling. She didn't even feel like breaking things ( which was her usual outlet for frustration and dismay.) She just felt... sort of hollow. Slouching into a hunched position resembling Shikamaru's usual posture, Temari took one last look back in the direction Shikamaru had dissappeared, before walking the opposite way.

Kankuro came crashing out of the bushes and ran up to her, his face turning the same color as his makeup. Temari wearily remembered that he'd been following her and had probably witnessed the whole exchange.

"That son of a. . . . I knew he was too good to be true. I'm going to smash his face in and rip his – Hey! Where are you going?" Temari gave her brother the slightest of sideways glances before continuing past him, making a bee line for the local hot springs. _ I need to relax and think for a while. _She left Kankuro sputtering behind her.

Kankuro's head repeatedly swiveled between the direction his sister was going and the direction Shikamaru had left, trying to make a decision. Finally, his face darkened and he began running in the direction Shikamaru had gone.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shikamaru, lay flat on his back in the wooded area, blood pooling around him. He had crawled for as long as he could remember, but had only managed to go a few hundred feet. Shikamaru figured he should probably keep going, but the pain was beginning to fade into a nice, warm, sleepy feeling. Small trickles of blood ran from the corners of Shikamaru's mouth, and when he coughed, his usually ivory teeth were stained crimson by the bloody sputem. He wished he could see Temari one more time, but his reasoning skills told him this was unlikely.

He had no idea how far he was from Konoha, and he was damn tired. His whole life, he'd always been lazy and sleepy, but never before had he experienced this kind of fatigue. It took all of his energy just to lift his hands to feel the rends in his chest. Sugekei's slash hadn't gone deep enough to damage any organs, but without a way to dress his wounds, Shikamaru was fairly sure that he would bleed to death soon. Sighing in resignation, Shikamaru stared up at the sky. He couldn't see the clouds through the forest's thick foliage.

_Temari._

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Temari sat neck deep, with her eyes closed, in her private bath, inhaling the warm steam that wafted up from the hot spring water. She had reached a state of calm separation, yet her mind still lingered on Shikamaru. She thought of the several years she'd known him, and smiled faintly. The usually fiery woman was unable to muster anger or dramatic misery, but the ache had begun to return. The slow, dull throbbing in her chest that made her wince slightly with every heartbeat.

She'd always imagined break ups as scream-fests full of shattered household objects and eardrums, but she had been wrong. Temari sank deeper into the bath, until everything below her eyes was sumberged. Opening her eyes slowly, she aimlessly tracked the currents of swirling eddies in the bath. Outside her stall, she heard the drunken chuckles of old men, and the high pitched giggling of harlots, but Temari managed to tune them out through sheer determination. Her eyebrows furrowed for a moment as there was a particularly painful lurch inside her chest, before she relaxed again.

_Shikamaru._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sugekei smirked as he returned to his favorite form, that of the tall willowy man he'd assimilated two centuries ago. He couldn't remember how many victims he'd claimed since then, or for that matter, before then, but Sugekei was sure of one thing. He was through hiding. For years, decades, centuries, he had been gathering power and forms, slowly working his way towards immortality. He had it all planned out. He first needed to establish a power base, which he could do in the relatively powerful Sunagakure.

His only problem was that he lacked a blood tie to the position of Kazekage. The council would most certainly not elect a mysterious vagabond, so Sugekei had to be sure that he climbed the social ladder; and more specifically that he bound himself to one of the most prominent clans. That's where Temari came in. At first, his plans for marrying her had been unpersonal and merely convenient. Things had changed, and now, Sugekei felt a primal hunger for her, both sexually and literally. When he slept, he dreamt of the warm, metallic taste of her blood, the electrifying feeling of assimilating part of her soul into himself. Sugekei would get what he wanted. He always did.

Stealthily scaling the walls of Konoha, Sugekei reflected on the last hour. He had severed all ties between Temari and the leaf boy. Sugekei snorted condescendingly when he thought about Shikamaru, the foolish child who had sought to take Sugekei's desert flower. At first, when he'd discovered the boy's diary in Temari's duffel bag after the two had escaped Kaizuketsu, Sugekei had almost destroyed it in his anger. But he had restrained himself, and, although the last date in the book was more than a year ago, had learned about Shikamaru's life. Using the knowledge he'd gained, Sugekei had had no trouble finding the Nara compound and the pasture Shikamaru had been in.

Sugekei thought back to the boy he'd left dying in the forest and almost felt a pang of remorse. But such feelings were far beneath him. Dismissing the thought, Sugekei jumped from the top of the sandstone wall down into the canopy of the surrounding forest.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shikamaru was bleary eyed and feverish when he felt a chakra presence nearby. He tried to call out, but his throat was cracked and caked with blood. He tried to crane his neck to see who the approaching figure was, but couldn't muster the energy to do so. Through half closed eyes, he saw a massive figure approach him and pause for a moment, without saying anything. The figure – Shikamaru judged he must be a man by his size – seemed to shake his head before kneeling next to the sprawled body of the leaf nin. Shikamaru lost consciousness as he felt a warm, tingling sensation begin to course through his veins.

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Kankuro stood hunched over in the middle of the busy village street, trying to catch his breath, while looking in every direction. Gritting his teeth, he dashed into a dingy alley, almost knocking over an elderly vendor and his cart. Looking wildly from side to side, Kankuro caught a glimpse of movement in a dumpster on his left. Snarling, he launched himself into the trash bin and siezed the source of movement. _Shikamaru, you son of a... _

It was a cat. To be more exact, it was a mangy, ginger, half starved, wild, vicious alley-cat. _Uh-oh. _The feline's initial surprise was replaced by its primal instinct to flee, and it had no qualms in clawing the bejeezus out of Kankuro to do so. As the cat let out a final hiss and scampered away, Kankuro cursed his luck (and the cat.) Nursing several scratches and bites, the pupeteer disdainfully pulled a piece of half eaten pizza off his hat and clambered back into the alley. Feeling his hat, Kankuro was dismayed to find it clawed beyond repair. Clenching his fist, Kankuro made a silent vow to exact double revenge on Shikamaru. One for his sister, the other for his tattered, cat-eared hat.

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**A/N: I always like a little bit of humor in my chapters, so I threw in that bit with the cat at the end. I know this chapter kind of sucked, but I'm getting back in the groove, so I hope you'll forgive me...**


	18. Conscious

**A/N: Unbelievable! A quick update time?!? You have Mussimm who wrote a very good fic called Rain that inspired me to get writing again. I guess this chapter is sort of rated M for gore and something that might disturb the more squeamish of you. But you should read it anyway! :[D (handlebar mustache smiley.)**

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Shikamaru usually dreamt of cold water and a sort of serene separation from the rest of the hectic world. This time, however, he dreamt of blazing, gritty grains of sand, scorching and soothing his skin at the same time. The pain in his chest was replaced by a tingly itch that was not entirely unpleasant.

In his dream, at first the sand merely cascaded all around him, as he watched in wonder from a bare patch of grass in the midst of it all. Then it began to grow closer. Sand swirled around him, touching him tentatively at first and then sweeping him off the ground. Startled, he stared down at the ground a hundred feet below him.

He was falling, and the sand was no longer around him, but he felt it coursing through his veins, bringing him warmth and restoring the strength he had lost. Shikamaru's tense expression relaxed and he calmly waited as the lonely patch of trodden grass grew larger.

Shikamaru woke to the sound of an owl hooting and crickets chirping. He felt a slight breeze on the sweat of his brow and sat up groggily, rubbing his head in dazed confusion. Memory returning to him, Shikamaru ran a hand over the front of his uniform, fingers tracing the tears in it. His shirt was stiff with crusted blood, and a metallic taste still lingered on his tongue, but the four wounds on him had stopped bleeding, and what felt like ten-day old scabs had formed over them.

Shikamaru stood up and examined his surroundings, still baffled at all that had happened in the last few hours. Even though night had fallen, the shadow nin could still make out the marks he'd made on the ground when he'd been crawling. Recalling his sense of urgency, Shikamaru dismissed his befuddlement and began to run in the direction of Konoha. Images of his assailant and Temari flashed through his mind's eye. _I wasn't the one he wanted._

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Kaizuketsu knelt on the Konoha rooftop, staring down into the bustling nightlife. It had been years since he'd been in a major hidden village, and he hadn't realized how much he'd missed it. Since Hotaru had died, Kaizuketsu had been a broken man. The wound left by her death had festered, twisting him into an unrecognizable person. He had never been more ashamed or confused than he was at this moment. Since he'd made the deal with Sugekei, he'd felt himself slowly lose control of his body, like there was another being sharing his corporeal form. He had no idea why he'd saved the Konoha runt, but anything that inconvenienced Sugekei seemed like a good idea.

The missing nin had almost instantly regretted his deal with the mysterious _thing. _He missed Hotaru more than anything, but deep down he knew that the only way he'd ever truly see her again would be in death. He stopped and put his finger to his chin, scratching thoughtfully at the stubble that had formed there.

_Maybe that's the solution. _Kaizuketsu stared down, suddenly struck by exactly how high up he was. The people walking in the streets below him were tiny shapeless blobs from his perspective. Steeling himself, Kaizuketsu clenched a fist, then relaxed. _No one uses me like a puppet. _Sighing in peaceful relief, he stood up and walked slowly to the edge of the building.

It wasn't to be. Every step he took became harder and harder, until he was sweating with the effort. He dropped to his knees a foot from the precipice as he felt a searing feeling tear through his body. He screamed as a hand pulled him back by the hair, dragging him away from his release. Paralyzed by some jutsu, Kaizuketsu could only listen to Sugekei's loathsome silky voice.

"You haven't held up your end of the bargain. I won't let you die until you do. Now, I'm going to explain in the simplest terms what I want you to do." Gritting his teeth, Kaizuketsu found the only thing he could do was listen. Sugekei pressed a vial of silvery liquid into his accomplice's hand and began to explain.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Temari shuddered slightly as a draft from the cool Summer night blew through the open window to the hot springs spa. Her skin had a flushed red color and steam billowed in tendrils from her bare shoulders and head. Toweling off, she left her hair down and dressed herself, slinging her tessen across her back before exiting her private room.

The escorts and their 'sugar daddies' had left, and Temari was struck by the peaceful silence that greeted her. Even though the flirtatious giggles and whispers had annoyed her, she found the absence of sound made her inexplicably sad. Her footsteps echoed throughout the building in a hollow manner, only adding to the loneliness that hit her like a wave of nausea. Fighting off any thoughts of self pity, Temari fiercely concentrated on the ground beneath her as she left the bathhouse.

As she walked back toward the Nara house, Temari thought through a thousand different conversation options for when she had to confront Yoshino about staying somewhere else. _What am I supposed to say, exactly? 'Oh hi, Yoshino-sama, I made out with your son, but then he decided I was an aggravating cow, so now I'm going to leave?'_

The sand nin let out a frustrated half-growl, half-yell and bit her lip. If worst came to worst, she decided that she'd just break into the house, grab all her luggage – which wouldn't be too hard to carry, considering she'd lost half of it on the mission – and make a hasty retreat to the hotel Gaara and Kankuro were staying at.

Having settled that, Temari began to walk more quickly, feeling the chill of night begin to set in. Shuddering slightly at the sudden drop in temperature, the Suna woman found herself imagining voices all around her, whispering in tones soft enough that they were unintelligible. Shivering uncontrollably, Temari stopped and forced herself to breathe slowly. Looking behind her, Temari glared into the darkness. She relaxed when the voices ceased, and turned to continue on her way, before stopping in silent shock. A sickeningly thin and tall figure stood in her path, moonlight reflected off the theater mask he wore.

Temari's heart began to race faster and faster as she instinctively leapt backwards, drawing her tessen. Forcing a warlike grin, Temari inwardly groaned. _This couldn't come at a worse time. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Gaara was busy with some foreign correspondence letters when one of the ANBU guards stationed came crashing through the door, splintering the ash wood and showering the fancy rug with blood-flecked splinters. The Kazekage calmly rose, organizing the papers he held and setting them aside for a later time. He watched with vague interest as the 2nd masked Konoha ninja stumbled through the door, clutching his head and foaming at the mouth. The man writhed around at Gaara's feet, puking blood and screaming in gibberish for a few more seconds before his eyes rolled back into his head and his thrashing ceased.

Small globules of quicksilver rose up from the ANBU's corpse and floated out the shattered remnants of the door, as if connected by strings to some puppeteer. Gaara, unaffected by the brutal death, uncorked his gourd and waited for the assailant to show himself.

Gaara's cold teal eyes flicked sideways at the last second and a wall of sand barely protected him from a vicious punch as a hulk of a man burst through the plaster wall on the East side of the room. Gaara's interest was piqued when he noticed the strange coloring of the man's eyes and hair. _A worthy opponent? _Considering the future inconveniences of a destroyed office, Gaara nimbly rolled under a kick aimed for his head and jumped out the window, landing on a bed of soft sand thirty feet below.

Glancing at the corpse of a chuunin who'd been on watch, Gaara felt his jaw tighten as he rose. _So much senseless killing. I've seen enough atrocities to last a lifetime. I'll end this quickly. _The red headed Kazekage crossed his arms and waited for his adversary, clouds of sand swirling all around him. Lights were flicking on, and Gaara heard a scream as someone somewhere stumbled upon a corpse.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Shikamaru heard the yells just as he had passed the security checkpoint at the gate into Konoha. Swearing under his breath, he broke into a sprint, more motivated than he'd been in a long time. Ignoring the sharp bouts of pain in his chest, Shikamaru rounded a corner – and was surprised when he ran into a fist.

Dazed, Shikamaru rubbed his jaw where he'd been hit and looked dizzily up at the purple mug above him. _Kankuro? _Shikamaru began a complaint, but it turned into an 'oooof' as the puppeteer's kick connected with the Shikamaru's ribs. Raising his hands, Shikamaru caught the next kick and struggled to his feet, dodging a flurry of strikes aimed at his head. _Taijutsu is not my forte. If I don't stop him soon, I'm royally screwed. _

Bracing himself, Shikamaru dropped his guard to perform several handsigns, taking an uppercut to the jaw from Kankuro's heavy hand. Nevertheless, Shikamaru's faint shadow enveloped Kankuro's and the sand nin found himself unable to move. Shikamaru was even more bewildered at the sound of the older man's strained laughter.

"You can't hold me forever, Nara. The second you run out of chakra, you're bloody pulp."

Shikamaru put his hands up in an appeasing manner, but inwardly winced at the way Temari's brother spat his name. Kankuro struggled to move while Shikamaru made an inquiry.

"What's going on? Did I miss something?" Kankuro shook with the effort of sneering, but managed to do so, his painted features contorting into an expression of ire.

"Don't play dumb, asshole. I saw you tell Temari you didn't want to see her anymore. I might not have liked you, but she did. She's more delicate than she seems. It is possible to hurt her. No one hurts my family and gets away with it." Kankuro's expression turned to confused surprise and his last words trailed off, when he saw Shikamaru's dumbfounded look. Realization dawned on Shikamaru's face and he looked into Kankuro's eyes. He released the shadow jutsu and was relieved to see that the puppeteer seemed willing to allow an explanation before resuming the pummeling.

"Listen Kankuro, you have to trust me. I haven't been in town all day. That wasn't me and –"

Kankuro snorted in disbelief and looked like he was about to make a move, but with great effort he restrained himself and forced himself to listen to the rest of what he no doubt saw as a poor excuse. Shikamaru sighed and gestured towards the four scars on his chest.

"A man ambushed me earlier today. He was stronger than anyone I've fought before, and I went down pretty quickly. I think he drank some of my blood, but I was all but incapacitated at that point."

Shikamaru rubbed the back of his neck, slightly ashamed of the disgraceful defeat he'd suffered. Glancing back at Kankuro to make sure he wasn't about to use one of his puppets, Shikamaru continued.

"I think he was one of Temari's suitors who wanted me out of her life. He must have some strange technique beyond a normal impersonation jutsu, like a ritual or something."

Kankuro lowered his fists but still looked uncertain. Sighing in exasperation, Shikamaru began to run again, offering a short breathed solution as he went.

"I swear, if I'm lying, I will willingly lie down and take a beating from you AND Gaara. Now do you know where she is?"

Kankuro shook his head in answer, and seemed satisfied, if only for the moment, and fell into step with Shikamaru. The pair loped through the streets of Konoha, cutting through small groups of people woken by the racket. After about 10 minutes of running, they came to the source of the noise. Gaara stood, an impassive look on his face, in the center of what had quickly turned into a ruined city block. For a brief moment, Shikamaru thought with dismay that the infamous Gaara had lost control and was the source of the rubble and fragmentation. Then, he caught sight of the missing nin who he'd done battle with twice. Wary of the dozen or so corpses scattered at their feet, Shikamaru and Kankuro tried to reach Gaara, but found their way obscured by an invisible barrier. Catching hold of several of Kaizuketsu's spikes and hurling them back with his sand, Gaara seemed like he was in control of the fight. Shikamaru nodded slowly and turned to Kankuro.

"I hate to leave Gaara without immediate reinforcements, but this is just a diversion. I think that ninja is working for the suitor I mentioned earlier. Whether he's doing it willingly or not, I don't know. Apparently the suitor sent his henchman on a suicide mission to engage the Kazekage in an open, noisy battle. It would distract the rest of us while he carried out his real objective."

Kankuro nodded in understanding.

"Right. Temari."

"Yeah. ANBU will be here soon. They'll find a way through this barrier to help your brother. We need to find Temari before the suitor accomplishes whatever it is he's trying to do..."

"We should try the bath house." Kankuro turned slightly red and huffed in self defense when Shikamaru gave him a skeptical look.

"What? She's gone there on previous trips when she's stressed out. You really think I'd want to ogle girls at a time like this?"

XXXXXXXXXX

Temari was doing her best to fend off Sugekei's attacks, but was running out of energy fast. Her observations told her that he was fighting at less than a third of his strength, and was using a probing strategy to determine her weaknesses and drain her chakra. Nevertheless, he was faster than most opponents she'd fought, and his strikes had left more than one dent in her iron tessen. Barely dodging a slash aimed at her stomach, Temari leapt backward and swung her fan for what must have been the twentieth time. Already panting from the effort, Temari grit her teeth when she saw the chakra laced wind merely force Sugekei back forty feet.

_I need to summon Kamatari, but I only have enough chakra to do it once. I'll have to wait for my best opportunity before I take that chance. If I miss, it's all over. Maybe flight would be a better course of action in this case. _A muted laugh issued from the suitor and the mask he wore contorted into an expression of gleeful humor. Temari hated to be mocked but was grudgingly thankful for the brief respite in the fighting.

"Your willpower is truly amazing, Temari of the Desert, but I know you are just as famous for your brain. Do you really think you stand any chance? Do us both a favor and give up. Save yourself the bodily harm and save me the time."

Temari snarled at him and kicked up a storm of dust with her fan, hoping to escape in the time it took for the dust to settle. She made it about a hundred feet in the direction of the bath house before a strong hand gripped her arm and tossed her to the ground effortlessly. She winced at the impact and felt something crack in her hip.

Sugekei stared down at her triumphantly and was about to make a snide comment when voices became audible, a couple hundred feet down the road from them. Grinning savagely, Temari used the distraction to nail Sugekei in his man parts with a vicious two footed kick. Gasping, the man let go of her and she rolled to safety, staring expectantly down the path. _Is it help or a couple of unlucky village people? _Sugekei performed a series of hand signs while Temari's eyes widened.

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After reaching the hot springs bath house and learning that Temari had indeed been there, Shikamaru and Kankuro had rushed along the road that led to the Nara house. As they were rounding a bend, the sound of a battle reached their ears. Picking up the pace, Shikamaru found that he was clenching and unclenching his fists repeatedly, and that he felt an urge to fight like never before.

A heart wrenching scream of pain and fear reached his ears and he felt his face harden as the battlefield came into view. Several buildings had sustained damage, and the most of the nearby trees had turned into stumps, but Shikamaru dismissed these observations quickly, his attention caught by something else. A crumpled form lay in the middle of the dirt road, the soil up to six feet away spattered with an unholy amount of blood. The Konoha ninja picked up no signs of any chakra activity nearby.

The shadow nin felt his breath catch in his throat, while beside him he heard Kankuro let out a strangled half-gasp half-sob. Ignoring the blood and gore, Shikamaru knelt beside Temari's motionless body while Kankuro desperately tried to find a pulse. Shikamaru stopped the older teen's search with a horrified gesture towards the fallen kunoichi's torso. Her ribcage had been torn asunder, and while he was no medic nin, Shikamaru could plainly see that the space between lungs reserved for the heart was empty. _That sick... Why? What could he possibly have to gain from –_

Shikamaru squeezed his eyes shut, looked away from his woman's body and retched, while Kankuro fought back tears and repeatedly called his sister's name in a hoarse voice. Shikamaru ran his hands through Temari's dry, beautiful blonde hair – and stopped, eyes narrowed.

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**A/N: HAHAHAHA! I hate cliffies when I'm the reader, but they're so much fun to write. It's not that hard to figure out, but hey... At least I updated quickly, eh? This should be the normal update time for the final three or four chapters in this story. I don't know what I'll write next, but I've been toying with the idea of Naruto meets space zombie virus :p. Review!**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Yeah, so it's been longer than a week since my last update. Sue me. The good news, is I have been toying with that disgustingly delicious idea of 'Naruto meets space zombies (with romance!)' and I think I'll go through with it. Some of you might not like science fiction, and it might just downright suck, but I am giddy as a school girl with the idea. ^_^**

As soon as he felt Temari's dry hair, Shikamaru knew his opponent was using genjutsu. Observation was one of his main strengths, and he was quick to catch the discrepancy in the illusion. _Temari just came from the hotsprings and it's a cold night. Her hair would be anywhere from damp to drenched, but this hair feels like it hasn't been in water for at least a day. He must have been rushed to be this sloppy._

Grabbing Kankuro, who was still on one knee beside his sister, Shikamaru shouted 'Dispel!' Their surroundings wavered like the disturbed surface of lake and faded. The scene around them hadn't changed much, but the spot they were standing in was no longer tainted with gore, and instead of lying sprawled in the dirt, Temari was crouched behind her metal war fan blazing eyes focused on her attacker. Shikamaru knew it was neither the place nor time for such thoughts, but the sight of her untamed, wild defiance towards Sugekei made his heart beat faster. _She's still alive._

He snapped out of his trance however, when Kankuro unfurled one of the scrolls he carried and summoned Karasu. The puppet rattled menacingly while its master took out a second scroll and began to summon Kuroari. Shikamaru meanwhile, took it upon himself to buy Kankuro time and relieve Temari.

Taking two Kunai with exploding tags attached from his equipment pouch and deftly tossed them at the ground near Sugekei. Twin explosions echoed through the empty streets and a screen of dust rose into the air. Taking the opportunity, Shikamaru darted his shadow forward to catch the man by surprise. The lanky creature jerked backwards and narrowly managed to avoid being caught by the shadow. Still, the attack met with some success, as Sugekei was forced away from Temari.

Bewildered by the sudden explosion and retreat of her enemy, Temari looked up and offered a tired, sad nod to Shikamaru. With a sick feeling, Shikamaru realized that she still thought he'd stopped caring abouth her. _There's not time for an explanation now._ Retreating back to her brother's position, Temari grinned slightly when she caught sight of the smeared purple tear streaks on Kankuro's face.

"I see you two finally woke up from your little day dream. What's a matter Kanky, were you that worried about me?"

Kankuro grumbled slightly at the use of his pet name, but couldn't resist a slight smile. The reunion was interrupted when a bolt of crackling fire whizzed towards Shikamaru's, a path of shimmering air in its wake. Before he could dodge, he felt Temari knock him out of the way. She landed next to him and gave a slight hiss of pain when her left hip made contact with the solid earth. Blowing a singed strand of hair out of her face, Temari was up just as quickly as she'd fallen, with one of Kankuro's puppets on either side of her, ready to step in between her and an attack.

Shikamaru rose slowly, biting his lip as he tried to pick out a weakness in Sugekei's fighting style, a chink in his defense to exploit. His frustration mounted as Sugekei dodged attack after attack in rapid succession, all the while firing off elemental blasts to keep the sand siblings and Shikamaru on their toes. _We're fighting a losing battle. We're all running low on chakra, especially Temari, while this guy shows no signs of slowing down or easing up. If I don't come up with something soon– _

At last Shikamaru picked up a pattern in the man's attacks. Testing his theory, Shikamaru tried approaching Sugekei from different angles and ranges. At ranges of over twenty yards, he relied on fire attacks of varying sizes. When Shikamaru was between ten and twenty yards away, with several handsigns the shapeshifter tended to surround himself with granite and asphalt spikes, brought up from the road and ground. The few times the shadow manipulator got about 5 yards away, he had to dodge volleys of ice shurikens.

All that was useful enough, but what really caught Shikamaru's attention was the lightning that sprouted from Sugekei's right hand, radiating crackling energy in the form of a six foot long blade. Shikamaru hoped he wouldn't have to feel the bite of the sword, but he knew that he'd have to get very close for any plan to work. _All right, now all I need is a source of water._

Shikamaru's train of thought was derailed with the sound of shattering wood and twanging strings, followed by sailor-like cursing. Kankuro looked astounded and dismayed as a bolt of fire shattered Kuroari, sending a hail of blazing splinters in every direction.

Even though Sugekei had taken up a fighting style that was intended mainly to drain his opponents and avoid taijutsu, he was still amazingly dangerous. _As soon as we're too drained to help each other at close range, he'll revert back to his hand to hand fighting, and we'll be finished._

Shikamaru ground his teeth together and his gaze switched between his allies, gauging how much stamina they each had. Kankuro looked like he was tiring quickly, but Temari looked like she was about to collapse into an unconscious heap at any moment. A vision came through his mind as Temari struggled to block or dodge the countless balls of fire aimed in her direction.

He felt a wave of nausea the vision of his own corpse lying next to Kankuro's – each scorched beyond recognition and cut into several pieces– invaded his mind. What really made him sick was the idea of Temari slung over the shoulder of a triumphant Sugekei, as he escaped Konohagakure completely unscathed and having achieved everything he wanted.

Squeezing the stiff outline of a scroll enveloped in the heavy green cloth of his front pocket, Shikamaru made a decision. Hopping back to Kankuro's position, he spoke in a low voice to the puppeteer.

"I need you to make a direct assault with Karasu. This guy will probably turn your beloved puppet into firewood and toothpicks, but I need the distraction to get close enough."

Kankuro looked pained for a moment before nodding his consent. Shikamaru mentally slapped himself at the lump he felt in his throat and the way his voice cracked ever so slightly when he continued.

"Listen, Kankuro. If something happens to me– Would you tell Temari that it wasn't me who dumped her today? That I did... and do love her." The Suna-nin looked at him strangely before nodding.

"Don't do anything corny, Nara. My sister would hunt you down in the afterlife and brutally murder you again if you sacrificed your life for her." Flashing a faux grin, Shikamaru moved away, calling back over his shoulder.

"You give me way too much credit. I'm not a hero like that."

Shikamaru couldn't help but smile a little sadly as he leapt to the top of a nearby one story building. _I hope it doesn't come to that._

XXXXXXXXXX

Gaara sucked in air greedily as he stumbled back from the punch that had caught him in the stomach. Konoha ANBU were working on breaking through the barrier that surrounded him and his assailant, and Gaara had great confidence in his abilities, but even the legendary demon Kazekage was having trouble keeping up with this beast of a missing ninja.

The sand nin heard a distinct groaning from behind him and rolled to the side as rebar from the building behind him broke free from the cement confining it and sped towards him. Gaara played the part of an opponent on his heels, dodging attacks and pretending to be off balance and off guard, while he maneuvered his sand in a flanking method, so that it approached his opponent from the rear.

With a slight smirk, Gaara closed his pale fist and watched as the sand hardened into a cocoon around Kaizuketsu, driving all air from the man's lungs. Still, the Kazekage was surprised when the last desperate sound of a dying man didn't reach his ears. He'd revelled in the feeling brought about by that scream of anguish for such a long time that he still subconciously took note of his enemies' death rattles. _Nothing. _Gaara's eyes widened as a metal hand shot out of the grainy coffin he'd created, tearing chunk after chunk of hardened sand out of the tomb. Grinning as the dented suit of improvised armor that had protected him fell to the ground with a clang, Kaizuketsu advanced towards the stunned red-head.

What Gaara didn't realize was that the grin was one of insanity and despair, rather than a taunt. It had started with Kaziuketsu losing control of his extremities. Before the battle with the sand nin had begun, he had lost feeling in his hands and feet, and was surprised when they acted for themselves, moving him in an awkward, shambling gait towards some unseen goal . Gradually, he'd lost more and more control before eventually finding himself with only his head at his own disposal.

Fighting futilely to gain control of his body, Kaizuketsu felt himself close the distance between himself and the Sand nin. Some strange energy coursed through his veins and he effortlessly destroyed every barrier Gaara brought up, leaving a trail of crumbling sand in his wake. For the first time, he sensed true desperate fear in his opponent, and the impassive expression that had remained plastered on the red head's face flickered for a moment.

The old Kaizuketsu would have taken great satisfaction in this development, but now he just felt sick. Globules of mercury floated in the air around the missing nin, before spreading and meshing into a sort of net. Gaara was cornered, with his back to the invisible barrier and, try as he might, could not completely subdue the look of a hunted animal. Kaizuketsu closed his eyes as he felt the mercury that his body was controlling begin to break the Kazekage's skin. _No. _

Eyes hardening with determination, Kaizuketsu bit down on his tongue with all his might, sending a spurt of warm blood into his mouth. The action had its desired result, and his body doubled over in pain as he began to spit blood, losing control of the mercury. Whatever it was that was trying to control his body had been caught by surprise, and Kaizuketsu found that, while he could not regain control of his limbs, he was fight the force to a standstill.

Gaara looked at the man with interest, cocking his head slightly to the side and sizing up his opponent, before hopping back into the middle of the makeshift arena. The figure he saw was visibly jerking, like a patient overcome by siezures. _Does he have some sort of chronic illness, like that sound nin did? Whatever it is... _Gaara formed a lengthy lance from sand and hefted it once before hurling it into Kaizuketsu's exposed back.

Hardened and sharpened by chakra, the spear tore through the paralyzed man's flesh, and the tip protruded from his chest as Kaizuketsu let out a gurgling, pained sound. The hulking body swayed for a few seconds before crashing to the ground. Gaara was almost too caught up in the victory to notice the thirty second delay between the incapacitation of his opponent and the faltering of the barrier ANBU from assisting him did not go down when he incapacitated his flashed across the Kazekage's face, as well as anger at being tricked.

"You two, keep this man alive. I'll want to talk to him later. The rest of you, either inform the Hokage that my sister and brother are in danger, or spread out to look for them." Bewildered at the orders issued to them, the ANBU nevertheless set about following them. New adrenaline flushed the fatigue from Gaara's veins as he began sprinting towards the Nara household. Gaara was not particularly religious, but he found himself praying under his breath.

XXXXXXXXXX

Waiting for the opportune moment, Shikamaru cast himself away from the building in a flash, making what looked like a carefully calculated attack from behind. Just as Sugeki dodged an attack from Karasu, Shikamaru launched himself towards the man's back, a razor sharp kunai grasped in each hand. Whirling around, Sugeki laughed and sent a ball of fire Shikamaru's way. Dropping the kunai in a show of surprised dismay, Shikamaru felt his momentum carry him until he skidded to a halt, a few yards from his target. Muttering the summoning jutsu while writhing in all too real agony, Shikamaru felt the small pool of water flash into existence, hidden from view beneath his contorted body. Eyes narrowed in silent expectation, Shikamaru felt a warm bead of sweat trickle lazily down the side of his singed face. Inside his head, he heard a nervous drawl. _'This had better work, Shikamaru...'_

XXXXXXXXXX

Temari watched in silent shock as Shikamaru hit the ground with a sickening thud and skidded to a stop. She grit her teeth and was about to make a furious charge at Sugeki when she felt a strong hand grab her by the back of her kimono. Staring back in wild frustraation, she tried to wrench herself free from Kankuro, but found that her brother had a determined hold on her. He rasped in a harsh whisper as she ceased her struggles.

"Do you really have that little faith in him? I don't spend nearly as much time with him as _you _do, and even I know that Shikamaru isn't the type to rush into a situation blindly. He has a plan."

Temari bit back an venomous retort and forced herself to watch, clenching her fists to stop herself from doing something rash. '_What do you care if he lives? You're his jilted lover, you're supposed to hate him...' _Temari was no stranger to righteous fury, but try as she might, she couldn't muster any of her usual fire when it came to hating Shikamaru. _Please, Shikamaru, have something up your sleeve. Grow up to wed your average wife and have your two children. Be happy. _

Electricity surged from Sugeki's outstretched hand, crackling and dancing into the form of a wicked blade as he stepped towards the fallen leaf nin. The snarling mask he wore changed into one of smug satisfaction as the shape changer allowed himself a derisive snicker."You smell like chicken, kid."

He brought the blade back and made a stabbing motion at Shikamaru's unprotected, still smouldering back. Shikamaru moved in a blur, but Temari's trained eye caught every millisecond of motion as he twisted himself up from his fallen position, lurched around the oncoming blade and siezed Sugeki's wrist. The teenager gave a smile of satisfaction as he tugged the arm down with all his might, towards a deep pool of water that had been hidden from view by his body. Making sure Sugeki was off balance, Shikamaru spun gracefully, and leapt towards safety, catching Temari's eye with a twinkle in his own ochre orbs. Temari dared to shoot him a lopsided, crooked smirk.

A disoriented hand shot out and grabbed him by the ankle, ending the brief moment of triumph. Even as the blue electr icity made contact with the murky water, Sugeki, unable to prevent his own electrocution, had made sure that he wouldn't die alone. Both men tensed up immediately and their bodies shook for a few seconds as electricity coursed through their systems. Temari couldn't see their bones in flashes, but Shikamaru's hair did puff out in every direction, straining against his hairband. Horrified, she watched as Shikamaru fell to the ground with a resounding thwack, and Sugeki swayed in place. Finally, the suitor sank to his knees, groaning in pain. _Oh no, you don't._

With a snarl, Temari rushed to the wounded man and hit him across the face with her furled fan, relishing the wet sound of forty pounds of iron against bone and flesh. His only response was to fall the rest of the way down and grunt as most of his teeth left his mouth in a violent exodus. She hit him four or five times more to make sure he was dead before turning to Shikamaru. Kankuro stood quietly behind her, as she knelt beside Shikamaru, knots forming in her throat and stomach. She put a hand a few centimeters above his mouth. No breath. Kankuro's head turned as the sound of hurried footsteps reached their ears. Hands shaking, she closed her eyes and checked his pulse. Nothing.

XXXXXXXXXX

Kaizuketsu grinned, showing off a multitude of gore stained teeth as he felt full control of his body return to him. In spite of the wound in his midsection, he felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Flexing his muscles and clenching his fists, he rose, as both ANBU turned from their defensive positions, evidently sensing the change in him. Too late. Kaizuketsu drove a fist into each of their stomachs and twisted, knocking them down and breaking several ribs. The stunned ninja stared up at him through their masks, both panting in apprehension. Angered by the masks, Kaizuketsu siezed both ceramic depictions of animals and smashed them against the cement of a nearby building. Then he paused, shaking his head. _ I really _**have**_ gone soft. _

Crouching between them, the metal nin sent each of them to dreamworld with a deft jab to the side of the head. Rising, Kaizuketsu looked around, and was pleasantly surprised not to see any other people around. Gingerly touching the whole in his stomach and spitting out a mouthful of blood from his torn tongue, he wondered where he would go. He smiled sheepishly. _Anywhere but here would be a nice start._

XXXXXXXXXX

Surrounded by several squads of ANBUs, Tsunade and Gaara rushed to Shikamaru's side as soon as they rounded the curve in the path. Gaara was about to shoot his sister an expression of disapproval when he saw that she was straddling Shikamaru, but he stopped himself when he saw that she was performing CPR and he wasn't responding. Tsunade rushed to Temari's aid and used a medical jutsu to get the fallen ninja's heart beating again. Temari breathed a sigh of extensive relief as she was granted the visual of Shikamaru's chest rising and falling on its own. She was all smiles and relieved laughter, and even Kankuro cracked a slight smile.

She saw out of the corner of her eye that Tsunade shook her head and walked away, a solemn expression on her face. Temari noted this as odd, but was too ecstatic to follow her observation up with an inquiry. Bending close to Shikamaru, Temari slapped him gently several times, expectantly waiting for his eyelids to flutter open. She waited to see his crooked smirk, to hear his sarcastic drawl, to witness the miraculous awakening of Konoha's laziest ninja after being deprived of oxygen for six minutes. Her relieved grin faded and was replaced by numb realization. His eyes didn't open.

XXXXXXXXXX

**A/N: So sad. Well, only one more chapter to go, then MAYBE an epilogue, but probably not. I loved writing this story, even during my lenghty hiatuses (hiati?) I'm not the best at closing stories, but I hope I did/do a decent job with this one. Thank you all for tolerating my unreliability and still reading.**


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